Ah,, the old Predestination debate. It's so easy to see both sides of this deal. I'll mention what I usually mention about this subject.
Firstly,, the confusion about this with many people stems from fear. Fear that maybe just as Judas, God chose us for a vessel of dishonor, and are serving a purpose to lead others to Him, yet in the mean time are headed for our own destruction and damnation.
Well, that's a lie straight from the pits of hell. That's what devils wisper in our ears, "God didn't choose you! You're believing for nothing, just wait and see!" It's the same old battle, and the same old lies.
And, not to give all the credit to devils either,,,, Our own insecurities and doubts play a huge role in this too.
Now we look and read these seemingly harsh words. And some argue that God chose between Jacob and Esau before either had done good or bad. They use that as the argument against free will. And, use Pauls argument also. Let's look a little closer at this.
In the first place, people try to explain this and quote the verses, yet leave out an explaination of "Who can know the mind of God?" also, to imply that God chose them before they had done anything implies that God can't see the future. Don't be so surprised, if you look back more towards the calvinistic doctrine, you'll see that it's believed that God can't see the future. It would have to be that way if Election was what we as humans see election.
But, if we study and read God's choice in his election of Jacob was a far wiser chose than an election of Esau. Even though Jacob had his sins, Esau was far worse, and was not an honorable man throughout his life. Some can blame that on jealousy, and that if he were chosen then he wouldn't have acted that way. But we can see Jealousy eating at his heart. Rather than being supportive of his brother, and honoring him we see him plotting against him. We see Esau being irresponsible, even the offerings Esau left were not of faith. Jacobs offerings were counted because they were of faith. Jus some small examples.
Now, on to "Those He foreknew he predestined to become the sons of God",,, why do we argue about a single word? Foreknew.
Strongs Greek 4267 Forknown: To know beforehand, ie. foresee: foreknow, foreordain, know, know before.
So, God knew before hand, before anyone had done good or bad. So, before Esau and Jacob were born, God knew them, knew their hearts, and their futures.
Pauls argument of, "what if" as in God chosing to show his glory and mercy through the vessels of wrath,,, Is a case of,, "Why did God create these beings knowing that they would be damned, and if God knew, then why is it their fault?" So, we see an explaination of why, But, even so,,, as SwampFox said,,, There's no indication that anyone is chosen for death and destruction.
Pharoh could've repented at any time, but refused to do so. Same with Judas, he didn't have to commit suicide, he could've repented, just as some of the soldiers who crucified Jesus did.
Mostly this all seems to imply more of a "free will" in that, those who chose to do evil, are not chosen. This goes with what Swamp Fox said,," So the case here is that God is certainly not playing. Remember that God gave mercy to whomsoever will believe despite our unworthy "
While we're still unworthy of ourselves, and since we were chosen before birth, it still makes God's election soverign and the choice still his. Because we all sin, and can't take away any of them, God still shows mercy on us.
Think of it this way,,, If you know a brick will never be able to read, would you try to teach it?
(edited to add)
Another thing to consider is, "God is not willing that anyone should perish, but all come to repentence" If you take people being chosen for destruction, that would nulify that scripture, and thus make God a liar.
Yet even more to consider is this,, God CHOSE some to be apostles, some to be teachers, some to be prophets, etc, etc,, could it be possible that some are chosen to believe from birth and thus predestined to be followers, while some were not chosen from birth, yet will be lead by those who were chosen?