Divorce and Remarriage

[Dave L]

Right, now I am really confused -somehow that comes across as a contradiction to what you originally posted - and you still haven't answered my question - unless of course you do not believe that I am saved !!!

Please re-state your question so I'm sure about how to answer.

 

[stunnedbygrace]

Can you explain that? I can't believe that you just said that. I was reading yesterday "I was in the Spirit on the Lord's Day..." and pondering what exactly it meant. I've been striving to get to a stronger place with God and I wondered what that verse meant. What does "in the Spirit" mean? I've had times that I've felt face to face with God and yet other times that seem dry and unproductive. How does a believer get "in the Spirit" - I prayed about that yesterday and have many times. I've had a strong desire to step higher or closer to God, is the best way to describe it. But at times it seems elusive.

Well...I can try to help with what I've learned of it but its not easy, so i'll stumble around a bit and we will both pray that He comes and teaches us, okay?

 

[Butterfly]

I think there are two ways to deal with this. The easy way is to separate as in any divorce but for good reasons. Or trust that God will resolve the situation. This could lead to a forceful separation by death, or desertion of the unbeliever, or worse.

what about the Christian who is already divorced , by the way I have no desire to remarry or have another partner. To date my ex was and has been my only partner.

 

[Butterfly]

Please re-state your question so I'm sure about how to answer.

I have asked it a number of times, do you think I have committed an unforgivable sin .

 

[Soverign Grace]

Its like the man who Jesus gave sight to and then asked him what he saw. The man said, well I see something moving around. I think it's trees...wait a minute, it can't be trees because trees don't move that way so...its men! I think I'm seeing men moving around!

And then Jesus did something else and the man then saw even more clearly.

Does it take God two tries to get a healing right? Or is even this true life story a parable for us?

What about the 3 men Who received their sight? They all ran off in excitement crying, I can see! I can see! Then only one of them returned to Jesus.

If a blind man has never seen anything and then he can suddenly see something, he might assume he is now seeing, even if his sight is really very dim and blurry. And how would he know he was only seeing very dimly when he only has complete darkness to compare it to?

I know the verse but I'm missing the point. I don't believe it would take two tries to get a healing right. I think you're pointing to a fault within the individual who couldn't see clearly yet. Are you saying that it's due to lack of spiritual sight?

I don't know if my experience resonates with anyone - it's something I have been striving for - a deeper connection to God. Maybe the answer is reading the Bible more, but even after reading it I sometimes walk away feeling unfulfilled - as if something is missing, but I don't know what yet. Maybe it's that I don't study enough and I'm spiritually anemic. Maybe it's that I've buried my talents. It's just something that I have struggled with and have been seeking an answer to. I'm sure it will come in time, but sometimes another believer can say something that resonates and you know God has communicated something to you. I spoke with a believer who told me God once spoke to her through Bonanza. I didn't doubt it because she was a solid Christian. Someone had remarked to me that I was like the person in Scripture who buried their talents. I wondered if that was God speaking to me through another believer. I did start a ministry of writing to prisoners, but outside of that I haven't done much to further God's kingdom. I thought maybe that was it. I used to evangelize more but had stopped so maybe that was it. Sometimes it's very hard to discern what God may be saying to you. I'm trying to listen for the still small voice. I think it takes practice since I have a lot of static.

 

[stunnedbygrace]

Can you explain that? I can't believe that you just said that. I was reading yesterday "I was in the Spirit on the Lord's Day..." and pondering what exactly it meant. I've been striving to get to a stronger place with God and I wondered what that verse meant. What does "in the Spirit" mean? I've had times that I've felt face to face with God and yet other times that seem dry and unproductive. How does a believer get "in the Spirit" - I prayed about that yesterday and have many times. I've had a strong desire to step higher or closer to God, is the best way to describe it. But at times it seems elusive.

First of all, you can't force it.

Second of all, it doesn't mean you are closer to God because you feel and sense Him. That's a baser way, for younger believers, and its not purer spirit. So when God sees fit to seem to disappear to your senses, and you find yourself wanting to try to push it, know that He is weaning you from this baser way of experiencing Him.
And do not kick and scream but rather determine that He knows what He is doing and submit to the dryness. It is the true fast in spirit. It is not a fast you chose. If you were given a choice, you would never choose it.

Its not easy, the true fast in spirit. You say, You promised I would never be thirsty again, so why do I feel you have led me to this dry place, this desert, and then left me here to die of thirst?

You will advance far more quickly if you do not do this, as Israel did, but instead say, my Lord knows what I have need of.

Is that enough for now? I think it might be enough for you.

I guess I have some counsel of what it would be good for you to read at this time. Read about Israel in the desert. Read how it says that He let them become very thirsty in that dry place. And then answer me, when you find it, WHY did He let them become very thirsty in the dry place. It tells why.

 

[Waiting on him]

I guess my impression is that people trust their "specialists" in the word and assume they've got it covered.

Huge difference in independent study verses following the doctrine of men

 

[Waiting on him]

I have asked it a number of times, do you think I have committed an unforgivable sin .

There is no unforgivable sin.

 

[Waiting on him]

Divorce is always a product of selfishness either on both or one or the others part. The way I view marriage is God gave me my wife to help encourage me to conform to the image of Christ, which is very hard given my selfish tendency.

 

[stunnedbygrace]

I know the verse but I'm missing the point. I don't believe it would take two tries to get a healing right. I think you're pointing to a fault within the individual who couldn't see clearly yet. Are you saying that it's due to lack of spiritual sight?

I don't know if my experience resonates with anyone - it's something I have been striving for - a deeper connection to God. Maybe the answer is reading the Bible more, but even after reading it I sometimes walk away feeling unfulfilled - as if something is missing, but I don't know what yet. Maybe it's that I don't study enough and I'm spiritually anemic. Maybe it's that I've buried my talents. It's just something that I have struggled with and have been seeking an answer to. I'm sure it will come in time, but sometimes another believer can say something that resonates and you know God has communicated something to you. I spoke with a believer who told me God once spoke to her through Bonanza. I didn't doubt it because she was a solid Christian. Someone had remarked to me that I was like the person in Scripture who buried their talents. I wondered if that was God speaking to me through another believer. I did start a ministry of writing to prisoners, but outside of that I haven't done much to further God's kingdom. I thought maybe that was it. I used to evangelize more but had stopped so maybe that was it. Sometimes it's very hard to discern what God may be saying to you. I'm trying to listen for the still small voice. I think it takes practice since I have a lot of static.

Stop trying to figure out what you have done wrong. Stop trying to come up with ways to fix this. Submit to the fast, and wait. If you can't read the bible much and you can't pray much, don't force things. The best you are really capable of when it seems He has removed your bread and water, is small sighs and few words, like...have mercy, or...my Lord knows what I need. You will pray in these small sighs.And wait in trust.

 

[stunnedbygrace]

And SG, He is purifying you in a fast, so you can receive more light. It won't feel that way. In truth, you are being bombarded with light right now, but it is so bright that it has overwhelmed you and appears like complete darkness.

Its like...when you stare at the sun. Its too much light for your eyes to receive, so it blinds you for a bit. The truth is, your eyes received a lot of light, but it also overwhelmed them and then you couldn't see.

 

[Butterfly]

There is no unforgivable sin.

So have miss read the OP - because it came across and gave me the impression that this was what was believed about divorce - I did ask in a later post if I had interpreted it the right way - how do you read it ?
Rita

 

[Helen]

Right, now I am really confused -somehow that comes across as a contradiction to what you originally posted - and you still haven't answered my question - unless of course you do not believe that I am saved !!!

I believe ( as you well know) that trouble comes when we trying to demand that 'one size fits all'.
I will always maintain that God will do what He likes without asking us.
He does not always 'stay neatly in His box' even though so many declare that He does! Not one of us was saved the very same way.
Poor old Hosea , as a living prophesy to Israel, was commanded to marry a prostitute who had been with many men.

Either way Rita. "Let not your heart be troubled..." ♥︎
You would only have to agonise over theses issues if you were considering remarriage...

You did not sin , you were sinned against by your Ex.
Your only issue is forgiveness and healing of betrayal...which is what you are working through, or worked through.

While out friend Dave here is on one hand a grace man, he is very obviously an unbending legalist too.

The bottom line is...each one of us is accountable before the Lord, and to HIM only we will answer. So we better know how to "Hear His Voice" personally when these issues arise.
Confusion come when everyone of us has an opinion and we are dishing out our advice. :)

 

[Helen]

There is no unforgivable sin.

Thank you brother...not many are brave enough to say that.
Agree!!

 

[Waiting on him]

So have miss read the OP - because it came across and gave me the impression that this was what was believed about divorce - I did ask in a later post if I had interpreted it the right way - how do you read it ?
Rita

I read the op as giving all of us insight as to how desperately we need Christ. You have a husband, he’ll never leave or forsake you... despite your human ability to be pleasing to him. This is the good news.

 

[Butterfly]

I believe ( as you well know) that trouble comes when we trying to demand that 'one size fits all'.
I will always maintain that God will do what He likes without asking us.
He does not always 'stay neatly in His box' even though so many declare that He does! Not one of us was saved the very same way.
Poor old Hosea , as a living prophesy to Israel, was commanded to marry a prostitute who had been with many men.

Either way Rita. "Let not your heart be troubled..." ♥︎
You would only have to agonise over theses issues if you were considering remarriage...

You did not sin , you were sinned against by your Ex.
Your only issue is forgiveness and healing of betrayal...which is what you are working through, or worked through.

While out friend Dave here is on one hand a grace man, he is very obviously an unbending legalist too.

The bottom line is...each one of us is accountable before the Lord, and to HIM only we will answer. So we better know how to "Hear His Voice" personally when these issues arise.
Confusion come when everyone of us has an opinion and we are dishing out our advice. :)

It's ok Helen I worked through everything and have complete peace with where i am ect. However i would rather know where I stand with others, thats why I have been pushing for a direct answer. Its one thing to blanket judge an issue, like divorce but it's quite another to actually admit where you believe a person is before God because of that issue.
I have met many Christians who proclaim ' I would never divorce my husband ' , until things goes wrong and the issue of divorce is slap bang in front of them.
I believe In a God that knows all the facts, dilemmas, all the sole searching and circumstances - and thats why i said 'i am glad that God is my judge ' xx

 

[Helen]

So have miss read the OP - because it came across and gave me the impression that this was what was believed about divorce - I did ask in a later post if I had interpreted it the right way - how do you read it ?
Rita

Just because it is the OP doesn't make it right, true, or God's intent.

In my life , some of the most loving, caring and anointed preachers I have met or heard, have been remarried.

I will be one to not answer these kind of questions by saying "I know" and have all the answers. I don't...neither does anyone else!!

God is God. God has done some strange things in strange ways.
Who can plumb His depth or understand His ways..

The only thing I do know is that we will each answer to God Himself on that Day. If we have listened to Him, and followed as faithfully as we can..then we have done all that we know how to do to be well pleasing in His sight.

Bottom line is...Who really cares if Dave thinks that because your husband betrayed, left, and divorced you...that is some crazy way "you sinned"!

Last time I looked, God had not died and put Dave L in His place as the supreme last word on all things....

 

[Butterfly]

Just because it is the OP doesn't make it right, true, or God's intent.

In my life , some of the most loving, caring and anointed preachers I have met or heard, have been remarried.

I will be one to not answer these kind of questions by saying "I know" and have the answer. I don't...neither does anyone else.

God is God. God has done some strange things in strange ways.
Who can plumb His depth or understand His ways..

The only thing I do know is that we will each answer to God Himself on that Day. If we have listened to Him, and followed as faithfully as we can..then we have done all that we know how to do to be well pleasing in His sight.

Bottom line is...Who really cares if Dave thinks that because your husband betrayed, left, and divorced you...that is some crazy way "you sinned"!

Last time I looked, God had not died and put Dave L in His place as the supreme last word on all things....

Yes, I know
Just for the record, my husband betrayed me, it was me that asked him to leave , and me who divorced him- I can own that x
There were reasons why I felt able to do that - and that's between me and God x
Rita

 

[Butterfly]

Maybe I am just looking for some honesty here x

 

[stunnedbygrace]

I know the verse but I'm missing the point. I don't believe it would take two tries to get a healing right. I think you're pointing to a fault within the individual who couldn't see clearly yet. Are you saying that it's due to lack of spiritual sight?

I don't know if my experience resonates with anyone - it's something I have been striving for - a deeper connection to God. Maybe the answer is reading the Bible more, but even after reading it I sometimes walk away feeling unfulfilled - as if something is missing, but I don't know what yet. Maybe it's that I don't study enough and I'm spiritually anemic. Maybe it's that I've buried my talents. It's just something that I have struggled with and have been seeking an answer to. I'm sure it will come in time, but sometimes another believer can say something that resonates and you know God has communicated something to you. I spoke with a believer who told me God once spoke to her through Bonanza. I didn't doubt it because she was a solid Christian. Someone had remarked to me that I was like the person in Scripture who buried their talents. I wondered if that was God speaking to me through another believer. I did start a ministry of writing to prisoners, but outside of that I haven't done much to further God's kingdom. I thought maybe that was it. I used to evangelize more but had stopped so maybe that was it. Sometimes it's very hard to discern what God may be saying to you. I'm trying to listen for the still small voice. I think it takes practice since I have a lot of static.

Maybe you are missing my point. Obviously it was a lack in the man. There's no lack in God! But maybe when we can suddenly see that God IS, it isn't complete sight. There is another thing He does to give us clearer sight.

In your 2nd paragraph, you say you don't know if your experience resonates with anyone but that you have been striving. But your experience DOES resonate with me and you should STOP striving and just go forward in calm trust that He knows what He is doing.

Cease all striving and know that I am God.

You feel no one is understanding you, but I absolutely do. You are searching around for what you have done wrong to cause this lack of feeling close to Him and want to find it and correct it. But having begun in Spirit, can you now perfect by your own effort? That's the opposite of trusting God. That's trying to help God in your perfecting. Won't work. You received the Spirit through some kind of hard work? You suppose you will take over from there?