How Do You Make Friends At A Church?

[Kira]

Hello. I am 63 years old, and very alone, but for the Holy Spirit. There is no family left to me, and I am disabled from a head injury in a car accident, so I have difficulty in meeting people. Friends have drifted away, as I am not in their daily schedule. I use a rolling walker, and drive myself, but get worn out still by doing so.


I have been growing spiritually for many years but find that I do so very slowly. Abba has been very kind, and keeps me going, and improving in health, but I remain alone...too much alone for comfort. I wish to have more than my dog and cat can provide, darlings though they are.


I am growing better slowly, and have reached out to a small church nearby, but find myself confused as to what to do to make friends. I am not socially inept nor am I shy in the slightest, but I am damaged, and I have no minder to tell me what is correct and not correct for a church.


Churches and how they operate are a mystery to me, but Calvary Chapel, the little Church I have begun to attend, are sweet and kind people, but they seem to be closed off to me, an outsider, and one who has a more Nazarene outlook than they and have mixed heritage as well that leaves me caught between Gentiles and Jews.


And the accident...well, it leaves me changed from who I was. I have no part of my consciousness to watch and plan and keep myself to myself as I should, being too open, too confiding, much like a young child tugging on his mother's skirt to get attention, and wanting to be seen and heard, even though I am not a known quantity to the Churchgoers.


I volunteer too much information and share too much, wanting people to get to know me all at once, and am open with all of me, and this is not desirable to others, as they do not know how to respond. And although invited to attend more, my physical health limits me to attending the quiet Wednesday Night Bible Study for the time being. This, not being a social meeting, leaves me enjoying the meeting, but feeling on the outside.


I need to know how to connect with these kindly people who are open to me being at their church, but who cannot know how hard it is for me to even attend one meeting a week, fit in between doctor visits, and the resultant emotional exhaustion and physical pain of even my minimal schedule.


I need advice from people who have gone to churches and know how they operate socially. I am aware that I have gone about trying to meet people the wrong way, trying to know people instantly, and that this is not a real possibility, but I am not really able to control that factor, due to the loss of some brain function in the car accident. Time, and contact will cure the matter, but it is very strange and uncomfortable now, and there seem to be no written guidelines on how to present yourself to the fellowship of a church, and find a welcome there, rather than tolerance.

 

[Nancy]

Hello. I am 63 years old, and very alone, but for the Holy Spirit. There is no family left to me, and I am disabled from a head injury in a car accident, so I have difficulty in meeting people. Friends have drifted away, as I am not in their daily schedule. I use a rolling walker, and drive myself, but get worn out still by doing so.


I have been growing spiritually for many years but find that I do so very slowly. Abba has been very kind, and keeps me going, and improving in health, but I remain alone...too much alone for comfort. I wish to have more than my dog and cat can provide, darlings though they are.


I am growing better slowly, and have reached out to a small church nearby, but find myself confused as to what to do to make friends. I am not socially inept nor am I shy in the slightest, but I am damaged, and I have no minder to tell me what is correct and not correct for a church.


Churches and how they operate are a mystery to me, but Calvary Chapel, the little Church I have begun to attend, are sweet and kind people, but they seem to be closed off to me, an outsider, and one who has a more Nazarene outlook than they and have mixed heritage as well that leaves me caught between Gentiles and Jews.


And the accident...well, it leaves me changed from who I was. I have no part of my consciousness to watch and plan and keep myself to myself as I should, being too open, too confiding, much like a young child tugging on his mother's skirt to get attention, and wanting to be seen and heard, even though I am not a known quantity to the Churchgoers.


I volunteer too much information and share too much, wanting people to get to know me all at once, and am open with all of me, and this is not desirable to others, as they do not know how to respond. And although invited to attend more, my physical health limits me to attending the quiet Wednesday Night Bible Study for the time being. This, not being a social meeting, leaves me enjoying the meeting, but feeling on the outside.


I need to know how to connect with these kindly people who are open to me being at their church, but who cannot know how hard it is for me to even attend one meeting a week, fit in between doctor visits, and the resultant emotional exhaustion and physical pain of even my minimal schedule.


I need advice from people who have gone to churches and know how they operate socially. I am aware that I have gone about trying to meet people the wrong way, trying to know people instantly, and that this is not a real possibility, but I am not really able to control that factor, due to the loss of some brain function in the car accident. Time, and contact will cure the matter, but it is very strange and uncomfortable now, and there seem to be no written guidelines on how to present yourself to the fellowship of a church, and find a welcome there, rather than tolerance.

Hello Kira,
I am 60 and am and have been alone for a long time, except for my 3 schnauzers. Over the last 2 years I have tried to integrate myself and cannot seem to connect with the women in my Church, except for one or two but, I have no children or spouse and our Church is full of young mom's and a ton of kids, lol! I did go to my pastor about it and he say's to step out of my comfort zone...so, I will place that at God's feet and see what He decides.
I am a pretty new member on here, I decided to join this forum to seek out fellowship, advice, encouragement and to maybe learn a few things. Just leave it with God and thank Him that He will work BOTH of our situations to the good
Praying for you!
-nancy

 

[Hidden In Him]

Hello. I am 63 years old, and very alone, but for the Holy Spirit. There is no family left to me, and I am disabled from a head injury in a car accident, so I have difficulty in meeting people. Friends have drifted away, as I am not in their daily schedule. I use a rolling walker, and drive myself, but get worn out still by doing so.


I have been growing spiritually for many years but find that I do so very slowly. Abba has been very kind, and keeps me going, and improving in health, but I remain alone...too much alone for comfort. I wish to have more than my dog and cat can provide, darlings though they are.


I am growing better slowly, and have reached out to a small church nearby, but find myself confused as to what to do to make friends. I am not socially inept nor am I shy in the slightest, but I am damaged, and I have no minder to tell me what is correct and not correct for a church.


Churches and how they operate are a mystery to me, but Calvary Chapel, the little Church I have begun to attend, are sweet and kind people, but they seem to be closed off to me, an outsider, and one who has a more Nazarene outlook than they and have mixed heritage as well that leaves me caught between Gentiles and Jews.


And the accident...well, it leaves me changed from who I was. I have no part of my consciousness to watch and plan and keep myself to myself as I should, being too open, too confiding, much like a young child tugging on his mother's skirt to get attention, and wanting to be seen and heard, even though I am not a known quantity to the Churchgoers.


I volunteer too much information and share too much, wanting people to get to know me all at once, and am open with all of me, and this is not desirable to others, as they do not know how to respond. And although invited to attend more, my physical health limits me to attending the quiet Wednesday Night Bible Study for the time being. This, not being a social meeting, leaves me enjoying the meeting, but feeling on the outside.


I need to know how to connect with these kindly people who are open to me being at their church, but who cannot know how hard it is for me to even attend one meeting a week, fit in between doctor visits, and the resultant emotional exhaustion and physical pain of even my minimal schedule.


I need advice from people who have gone to churches and know how they operate socially. I am aware that I have gone about trying to meet people the wrong way, trying to know people instantly, and that this is not a real possibility, but I am not really able to control that factor, due to the loss of some brain function in the car accident. Time, and contact will cure the matter, but it is very strange and uncomfortable now, and there seem to be no written guidelines on how to present yourself to the fellowship of a church, and find a welcome there, rather than tolerance.

Hi Kira, and welcome to Christianity Board.

For starters, I think you found a good online community here. Many of the active members are older like yourself and more mature. They are also fairly tight-knit and welcoming, so I don't think you would have many problems fitting in here.

About loneliness, let me quote you something. This is from Thomas a' Kempis:

"What is more at rest than a heart focused solely on You, and what is more free than the person who desires nothing on earth? We should rise above all creatures, therefore, and perfectly forsake ourselves and remain in an intense joy of mind as we see that among all creatures there is nothing like You, the Creator of all things." I know it may seem hard to do this, but he was right. Try to refocus your emotional and social dependence upon Him as much as possible. He will always be there for you and never let you down.

As for church friendships, I think that's something you should pray for rather than just attending and hoping for the best. Pray to Him that He guides you to some potential friends in the Lord. It might come by attending specific functions, or it might not come through that church at all. It might come through just meeting someone in your everyday affairs.

I hope this helps.
Blessings in Christ.

 

[Willie T]

I'm not one to flit around subjects. I like to land right on them, so I will.
If the people at this church are not given to introducing themselves to strangers visiting their place.... are you sure this is really where you want to be?

 

[Helen]

Hello Kira,
I am 60 and am and have been alone for a long time, except for my 3 schnauzers. Over the last 2 years I have tried to integrate myself and cannot seem to connect with the women in my Church, except for one or two but, I have no children or spouse and our Church is full of young mom's and a ton of kids, lol! I did go to my pastor about it and he say's to step out of my comfort zone...so, I will place that at God's feet and see what He decides.
I am a pretty new member on here, I decided to join this forum to seek out fellowship, advice, encouragement and to maybe learn a few things. Just leave it with God and thank Him that He will work BOTH of our situations to the good
Praying for you!
-nancy

Good word.

When I saw the topic "How do you make friends in church"? I almost just wrote my answer as "with difficulty" !!
The majority of churches I find unfriendly.
If the word is good and the worship good , you are on the winning side..but to get ..A good rich word, and good holy Spirit worship AND friendly people...well I have not found that for the last 20yrs since ( well never mind since....) I am just thankful for my first 30 years when it was so. But what "church" was back in the 60's, 70's and 80's is much different to today...most places are too slick now.

The only answer I have is " Invite people over to your house" out of the many you invite over ( not all at the same time lol) you may reap one...two if you are lucky.
Be prepared, the invite is not usually reciprocal .

 

[Helen]

@Kira
WELCOME TO THIS SITE.... You have some good answers here in the posts, I hope they help you.

 

[Willie T]

This Sunday, we are leaving a new church we have been attending for about 4 or 5 months. There are several reasons, but one of them is that my wife and I (especially my wife) do about three times more greeting of strangers than do the long-time members there.

 

[larry2]

Hello. I am 63 years old, and very alone, but for the Holy Spirit.

Hello dear Sister Kira, and welcome to these forums of Christian fellowship.
I read your post with utmost interest, and find no reason you would not be met with Christian love you seem to desire. I personally am not able to attend church services regularly, and when I do I am just myself; jeans, a t-shirt, and a smile for any who I meet. Families are usually adsorbed in their own prearranged get-togethers, and then many of the singles are just keeping their heads above water so to speak.

Friendships are built most time with effort; pain, sufferings, and love. One manner of becoming one with others is to become involved in Church organized dinners, such as cooking, serving, or even cleaning up afterwards.

Most churches have people that visit the sick that you may want to seek out through your pastor. Your present thorn in the flesh and ability to go forward is certainly fodder to some that may be struggling with their own lives. Such love shown most times produces the very comradeship among brethren you want.

I see the need to pray for your deliverance, and to find the very real mission our Father is preparing you for exclusively. Don’t despise the day of small things, for God can make them days of rejoicing. King David with all he had once said: Restore unto me the joy of Thy salvation, and that’s what we should want.

Blessings in Christ Jesus.

 

[Nancy]

Good word.

When I saw the topic "How do you make friends in church"? I almost just wrote my answer as "with difficulty" !!
The majority of churches I find unfriendly.
If the word is good and the worship good , you are on the winning side..but to get ..A good rich word, and good holy Spirit worship AND friendly people...well I have not found that for the last 20yrs since ( well never mind since....) I am just thankful for my first 30 years when it was so. But what "church" was back in the 60's, 70's and 80's is much different to today...most places are too slick now.

The only answer I have is " Invite people over to your house" out of the many you invite over ( not all at the same time lol) you may reap one...two if you are lucky.
Be prepared, the invite is not usually reciprocal .

"with difficulty" !! Hahahaha...you got that right! Now, wouldn't you think it should be the opposite?
It is funny you say that about inviting people over and that is exactly what I want to do but...there is work needing to be done and certain projects in the making. And yes Helen, I will be prepared for the turn downs, lol. Even so...we sill have many people in my Church who also need reaching out to and, lot's of folks avoid them it seems. They can be very clingy and or needy but then, Christ does call us to love the hard to love people

 

[Kira]

Hello Kira,
I am 60 and am and have been alone for a long time, except for my 3 schnauzers. Over the last 2 years I have tried to integrate myself and cannot seem to connect with the women in my Church, except for one or two but, I have no children or spouse and our Church is full of young mom's and a ton of kids, lol! I did go to my pastor about it and he say's to step out of my comfort zone...so, I will place that at God's feet and see what He decides.
I am a pretty new member on here, I decided to join this forum to seek out fellowship, advice, encouragement and to maybe learn a few things. Just leave it with God and thank Him that He will work BOTH of our situations to the good
Praying for you!
-nancy

Thank you, Nancy. Oddly, even as I wrote the post, I got the feeling that it was out of my hands for the present. There is no way to 'rush' a church as one would a sorority without having youth and a lot of energy to press into the various projects, and bump into all the people a lot to discover those that might be friendly, or even open to friendship.

I don't have the energy, due to my health, which although improving, is not putting in the active status yet. Abba has been working with me for over two decades since the auto accident that sidelined me from an exterior kind of life, and has told me directly what he wants done...and I think I may have strayed beyond where I am meant to be for now.

I am better in some ways than the person I was before, but I am reminded again as I write that I was sidelined for some specific reasons and for other purposes than I wanted for myself. I know what I am supposed to do, but oddly, I did not seek Abba's advice or even consent to align myself with these people, or any church. Scripture seems plain enough that we are to find fellowship with each other, but I do have a lot wrong with me, from a relationship point of view. People using walkers are common enough in any church, but I also need a sign or badge to tell people I don't think like they do...as in permanent differences in how I think due to injury.

And by saying that, I mean that I really don't notice the same things I might were I able to be engaged with a full mind, nor respond properly to the cues and signals people give off, even though I used to read those signals well before I was hurt. It is a reminder to me to not expect understanding much anywhere, as one cannot go about looking normal if slightly knocked about due to the accident, yet feeling as if you are not able to connect in the right ways anymore. It doesn't help that I have never been a church member, so I don't know what is wanted at a church...only that I have nothing to give in the normal ways I see the others doing by simply being at four to five meetings a week. One a week is already almost too much for me.

 

[Kira]

Hello Kira,
I am 60 and am and have been alone for a long time, except for my 3 schnauzers. Over the last 2 years I have tried to integrate myself and cannot seem to connect with the women in my Church, except for one or two but, I have no children or spouse and our Church is full of young mom's and a ton of kids, lol! I did go to my pastor about it and he say's to step out of my comfort zone...so, I will place that at God's feet and see what He decides.
I am a pretty new member on here, I decided to join this forum to seek out fellowship, advice, encouragement and to maybe learn a few things. Just leave it with God and thank Him that He will work BOTH of our situations to the good
Praying for you!
-nancy

Thank you, I need the prayers. I am also willing to simply let things be for a while, until G-d makes a way for me.

 

[Kira]

Hello dear Sister Kira, and welcome to these forums of Christian fellowship.
I read your post with utmost interest, and find no reason you would not be met with Christian love you seem to desire. I personally am not able to attend church services regularly, and when I do I am just myself; jeans, a t-shirt, and a smile for any who I meet. Families are usually adsorbed in their own prearranged get-togethers, and then many of the singles are just keeping their heads above water so to speak.

Friendships are built most time with effort; pain, sufferings, and love. One manner of becoming one with others is to become involved in Church organized dinners, such as cooking, serving, or even cleaning up afterwards.

Most churches have people that visit the sick that you may want to seek out through your pastor. Your present thorn in the flesh and ability to go forward is certainly fodder to some that may be struggling with their own lives. Such love shown most times produces the very comradeship among brethren you want.

I see the need to pray for your deliverance, and to find the very real mission our Father is preparing you for exclusively. Don’t despise the day of small things, for God can make them days of rejoicing. King David with all he had once said: Restore unto me the joy of Thy salvation, and that’s what we should want.

Blessings in Christ Jesus.

Indeed, I covet your prayers, particularly as I know hat I am supposed to be doing and am not doing it in the limited time and energy I have. I need to pull back, and consolidate my attention where I have already been told to, and not stray into social outings merely because I can finally stretch my abilities to do so.

 

[Kira]

This Sunday, we are leaving a new church we have been attending for about 4 or 5 months. There are several reasons, but one of them is that my wife and I (especially my wife) do about three times more greeting of strangers than do the long-time members there.

It's sad that we are all so rushed that we do not put the people first, and the schedule second, but that is our world at present. It was waht I have been experiencing, despite the reluctance I see in the litle church to absorb another member, and one who cannot be at every meeting they wish to have people attend. And yet, I can see them being family-like, were there only energy and time enough in the world for me to participate properly.

I will pray for you to find a friendlier group

 

[larry2]

I know hat I am supposed to be doing and am not doing it in the limited time and energy I have.

Thank you Sister Kira for your reply. This is just my thoughts, but I've never had to be doing something spiritually to know it was God's leading that makes the way in those things He wills for me.

Php 2:13 For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure. There has been no toil as My Father arranges every part of my life to be in His perfect will for me. I'm thankful you're able to be here among brethren of like faith, as God continues to work in your life to attain unto His very best for you.

If you remember the thorn in the flesh of Paul, he certainly didn't want it (2 Cor 12:8), but it gave him the necessary qualifications to become what God wanted for his life, and then actually writes of God's revealed testimony (Gal 1:11-12) in Rom 8:28 that all those things worked together for his good.

God bless you in Jesus' name.

 

[Nancy]

Thank you, Nancy. Oddly, even as I wrote the post, I got the feeling that it was out of my hands for the present. There is no way to 'rush' a church as one would a sorority without having youth and a lot of energy to press into the various projects, and bump into all the people a lot to discover those that might be friendly, or even open to friendship.

I don't have the energy, due to my health, which although improving, is not putting in the active status yet. Abba has been working with me for over two decades since the auto accident that sidelined me from an exterior kind of life, and has told me directly what he wants done...and I think I may have strayed beyond where I am meant to be for now.

I am better in some ways than the person I was before, but I am reminded again as I write that I was sidelined for some specific reasons and for other purposes than I wanted for myself. I know what I am supposed to do, but oddly, I did not seek Abba's advice or even consent to align myself with these people, or any church. Scripture seems plain enough that we are to find fellowship with each other, but I do have a lot wrong with me, from a relationship point of view. People using walkers are common enough in any church, but I also need a sign or badge to tell people I don't think like they do...as in permanent differences in how I think due to injury.

And by saying that, I mean that I really don't notice the same things I might were I able to be engaged with a full mind, nor respond properly to the cues and signals people give off, even though I used to read those signals well before I was hurt. It is a reminder to me to not expect understanding much anywhere, as one cannot go about looking normal if slightly knocked about due to the accident, yet feeling as if you are not able to connect in the right ways anymore. It doesn't help that I have never been a church member, so I don't know what is wanted at a church...only that I have nothing to give in the normal ways I see the others doing by simply being at four to five meetings a week. One a week is already almost too much for me.

Oh Kira, I can definitely relate, to the physical trauma (no TBI as I was wearing a helmet) done to my body in a motorcycle accident in the 80's
Since then, I have had 6 surgeries and at the preset, I am pretty much house bound as I had foot surgery that will keep me non weight bearing for 8 weeks...I know my limitations as I am sure you know yours. So, in regards to being able to find a niche where you feel comfortable and welcomed, if their true Christian, they should understand these things. Have you talked to the pastor at all? Well, you have given this to our King and have acknowledged Him about it so...now it's the waiting game, lol.
We have a Calvary Chapel near us, I think it is in Elma Ny...one of my brothers went there for awhile and now he goes to my Church.
Know that I am praying for some sort of a breakthrough for you where this is concerned. And, BTW---God can use us in any way He sees fit despite our limitations!
God bless you!
-nancy

 

[actionsub]

But what "church" was back in the 60's, 70's and 80's is much different to today...most places are too slick now.

That says it all right there. Church has become a show one attends, not a place of worship. It can be really quite
discouraging.

 

[kit]

Hello. I am 63 years old, and very alone, but for the Holy Spirit. There is no family left to me, and I am disabled from a head injury in a car accident, so I have difficulty in meeting people. Friends have drifted away, as I am not in their daily schedule. I use a rolling walker, and drive myself, but get worn out still by doing so.


I have been growing spiritually for many years but find that I do so very slowly. Abba has been very kind, and keeps me going, and improving in health, but I remain alone...too much alone for comfort. I wish to have more than my dog and cat can provide, darlings though they are.


I am growing better slowly, and have reached out to a small church nearby, but find myself confused as to what to do to make friends. I am not socially inept nor am I shy in the slightest, but I am damaged, and I have no minder to tell me what is correct and not correct for a church.


Churches and how they operate are a mystery to me, but Calvary Chapel, the little Church I have begun to attend, are sweet and kind people, but they seem to be closed off to me, an outsider, and one who has a more Nazarene outlook than they and have mixed heritage as well that leaves me caught between Gentiles and Jews.


And the accident...well, it leaves me changed from who I was. I have no part of my consciousness to watch and plan and keep myself to myself as I should, being too open, too confiding, much like a young child tugging on his mother's skirt to get attention, and wanting to be seen and heard, even though I am not a known quantity to the Churchgoers.


I volunteer too much information and share too much, wanting people to get to know me all at once, and am open with all of me, and this is not desirable to others, as they do not know how to respond. And although invited to attend more, my physical health limits me to attending the quiet Wednesday Night Bible Study for the time being. This, not being a social meeting, leaves me enjoying the meeting, but feeling on the outside.


I need to know how to connect with these kindly people who are open to me being at their church, but who cannot know how hard it is for me to even attend one meeting a week, fit in between doctor visits, and the resultant emotional exhaustion and physical pain of even my minimal schedule.


I need advice from people who have gone to churches and know how they operate socially. I am aware that I have gone about trying to meet people the wrong way, trying to know people instantly, and that this is not a real possibility, but I am not really able to control that factor, due to the loss of some brain function in the car accident. Time, and contact will cure the matter, but it is very strange and uncomfortable now, and there seem to be no written guidelines on how to present yourself to the fellowship of a church, and find a welcome there, rather than tolerance.

Hi Kira, Im new here too. I came here for more fellowship and to grow the community of people that I can grow in Christ with. I like it here!

Churches, like the wider society are not typically great with disability. Also the 'no kids' thing is often a barrier to entering the social circles. Its sad and falls short of Christs calling. I am very inspired by the unyielding grace you are offering your church by seeing things from their side too. I pray God will bless them with the same wisdom He's given you.

As for how to make friends? I dunno either! I wonder if people would like to add a social aspect to the Wednesday Bible Study you attend? Brownies and fruit punch seem to glue a church together, lol!

"There will be refreshments provided following the Service." Should be a line in a hymn of praise!

 

[JesusIsFaithful]

Hello. I am 63 years old, and very alone, but for the Holy Spirit. There is no family left to me, and I am disabled from a head injury in a car accident, so I have difficulty in meeting people. Friends have drifted away, as I am not in their daily schedule. I use a rolling walker, and drive myself, but get worn out still by doing so.


I have been growing spiritually for many years but find that I do so very slowly. Abba has been very kind, and keeps me going, and improving in health, but I remain alone...too much alone for comfort. I wish to have more than my dog and cat can provide, darlings though they are.


I am growing better slowly, and have reached out to a small church nearby, but find myself confused as to what to do to make friends. I am not socially inept nor am I shy in the slightest, but I am damaged, and I have no minder to tell me what is correct and not correct for a church.


Churches and how they operate are a mystery to me, but Calvary Chapel, the little Church I have begun to attend, are sweet and kind people, but they seem to be closed off to me, an outsider, and one who has a more Nazarene outlook than they and have mixed heritage as well that leaves me caught between Gentiles and Jews.


And the accident...well, it leaves me changed from who I was. I have no part of my consciousness to watch and plan and keep myself to myself as I should, being too open, too confiding, much like a young child tugging on his mother's skirt to get attention, and wanting to be seen and heard, even though I am not a known quantity to the Churchgoers.


I volunteer too much information and share too much, wanting people to get to know me all at once, and am open with all of me, and this is not desirable to others, as they do not know how to respond. And although invited to attend more, my physical health limits me to attending the quiet Wednesday Night Bible Study for the time being. This, not being a social meeting, leaves me enjoying the meeting, but feeling on the outside.


I need to know how to connect with these kindly people who are open to me being at their church, but who cannot know how hard it is for me to even attend one meeting a week, fit in between doctor visits, and the resultant emotional exhaustion and physical pain of even my minimal schedule.


I need advice from people who have gone to churches and know how they operate socially. I am aware that I have gone about trying to meet people the wrong way, trying to know people instantly, and that this is not a real possibility, but I am not really able to control that factor, due to the loss of some brain function in the car accident. Time, and contact will cure the matter, but it is very strange and uncomfortable now, and there seem to be no written guidelines on how to present yourself to the fellowship of a church, and find a welcome there, rather than tolerance.

Seek to be a friend rather than seeking people to be friends with you.

Maybe listening more is better than talking about yourself, then share what is relevant to those you listen to, but trust Him to help you not over do it.

Maybe letting people know that you are available to talk to that they can stop by or call anytime if they want to is a ministry of Him through you to others by itself. You may find that by helping others, you may be helping yourself. So give your request to God for help in this area of your life.

 

[Helen]

That says it all right there. Church has become a show one attends, not a place of worship. It can be really quite
discouraging.

Yes agree.
Good to see you here.

 

[Kira]

I wish that they had such a ministry in their group, but they seem to have no one going about doing good, so to speak, and I haven't the ability or health yet to start u

Thank you Sister Kira for your reply. This is just my thoughts, but I've never had to be doing something spiritually to know it was God's leading that makes the way in those things He wills for me.

Php 2:13 For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure. There has been no toil as My Father arranges every part of my life to be in His perfect will for me. I'm thankful you're able to be here among brethren of like faith, as God continues to work in your life to attain unto His very best for you.

If you remember the thorn in the flesh of Paul, he certainly didn't want it (2 Cor 12:8), but it gave him the necessary qualifications to become what God wanted for his life, and then actually writes of God's revealed testimony (Gal 1:11-12) in Rom 8:28 that all those things worked together for his good.

God bless you in Jesus' name.

Thorns in the flesh have come a lot to my mind since I was told 'with authority' at my last visit to the little chapel that demons do not afflict people filled with the Ruach haKodesh. I don't think fast enough for repartee anymore, but as I was driving home after the last meeting, I recalled Sha'ul having just such a demon by his own statement, because he was prone to pride, and that G-d would not relieve him of the problem. I too once had brilliance and much capability and was too high in my own estimation. The fall was noisy and painful.

I seem to be aware of a lot of the unseen world...not by sight or sound except in dreams, or if G-d wants me to see something, where I can tell the bad messages from those sent from the Ruach as a teaching, but I am aware that a lot of people simply do not want to get to close to that realm, not even at second hand. But even the demons who approach me flee when I realise just what is speaking at me, and flee promptly when I remind them they have no part in me because of Yeshua.

You are correct in reminding me that the corrective measures allowed in the car accident were and are a training tool. It is unfortunate that my mind is as scattered by the accident as well, or I would be more able to make use of what I have learned, instead of bumbling after each new thing I am shown, or what is revealed from scripture when I am not being able to put them together as yet in a way to make use of them. I understand what I have been shown, but I am distracted too easily by the least little things of the outer world, and they do get in my way of using any new understanding. Consequently, I need to cling to the inner world in the quiet of my home as much as I am able and do what I have been told to do.

I know that Abba continues to recall that my mind and body are not yet able to live up to what I must begin to do, but he reminds me that I have been made so unable to cope outwardly so as to turn inwardly, to listening, reading and writing. It seems unproductive and lonely, but I do not know the final result or the outcomes of what will happen in the future, or how what little I am capable of will be used.

Thank you all for hearing me out, and for allowing me to gather my thoughts in your collective presence. I took a wrong turning and thought my inabilities were showing themselves to me as a social problem, rather than a spiritual reining in.

I have been told long since to do three specific things that I am able to do at home, that I cannot do elsewhere, and must be done alone. I need to find a way to remind myself of them, day in and day out and to prioritize what there is of useful time to me to get them done. Going after what seems to be a more ordinary course of being with people, fellowshipping and working with others is not in my path for the present, and after trying so hard to do what I have NOT been told to do, it actually seems to be in relief that I turn back to my G-d given tasks.