I have been a Christian for 46 years, and are in reluctant but frank agreement with your view of the parlous state of the Christian church at present, and it is regrettable that your personal interaction with Christians as you grew up, and your familial circumstances contributed to your rejection of Christianity and the Christian God. This is understandable. You have eloquently explained your experience, and I believe it, having shared some of those same experiences of churches who had developed into nothing more than social clubs, a long way from the way Jesus had led and commanded of His followers. But that situation, while true in many places, is not common to every church. It is sad you didn't get to see that there is another side to the Christian church. A side that does have compassion, that truly cares about the downtrodden and the lost, and goes out of their way to help in whatever ways they can, sacrificing self on behalf of others.
I also have a lady friend who is pagan. She is kind, loving, and generous. But sadly, she is not saved. Her sins, her lifestyle, albeit in a human sense outwardly socially acceptable, hides an inner existence bereft of the true God...a life and mindset that rejects the one true God of the Bible as the ultimate and solely worthy authority and Lord. As the apostle Paul said,
KJV 1 Corinthians 8:5-6
5 For though there be that are called gods, whether in heaven or in earth, (as there be gods many, and lords many,)
6 But to us there is but one God, the Father, of whom are all things, and we in him; and one Lord Jesus Christ, by whom are all things, and we by him.
As to your statement that your gods predate the God of the bible... Not so. The one true God created all things, be they spirits or human, whether in this world or others, and He created them through His only Son, Jesus, who said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life, no man comes to the Father except by Me".
While you give credit to your gods for the good things that have taken place in your life, I would suggest the glory be given the Creator, He who loves you enough to give His only Son to die on your behalf. KJV Romans 2:4
4 Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance?