I think the problem is that you don't understand what Calvin taught.
I say this because your post above is so confusing that I can't really answer to it.
Tell me if you agree with the following:
The anagram for calvinism is the TULIP. It's much more complicated than this, but this is the simple form...
T: Total Depravity
Man was born TOTALLY depraved. So depraved that he cannot raise himself up to know God or to accept God. God must raise a man up to meet Him or that man will NEVER attain to God because of his totally depraved nature. I said TOTALLY.
U: Unconditional Election
God choose, from before time, who will be saved by Him. This choice is not based on anyting..it is unconditional. Man has no say in this decision. God chooses who will be saved and who will be damned, no part of this choice is left to man. God alone makes the choice.
L: Limited Atonement
Jesus died ONLY for the persons that God elected to be saved from before time, as in the U. Jesus DID NOT die for any human being that wishes to be saved. They may not call on His name. ONLY those who were chosen by God can avail themselves of the atonement of Christ. No one else.
I: Irresistible Grace
God not only pours His grace on those He elects, but His grace is irrisistible. The person cannot say no to it...the person thinks they WANT to do something, bur really it's God making them do it and in a very sneaky way.
P: Perseverance of the Saints
Those that God chooses will make it to the end. This is where the idea of eternal security, or OSAS, comes from. And, just like all of Calvin's teachings, this one is also not biblically correct. AND, to persevere, it is necessary to do God's works.
Yes, works. Quite a conflict of ideas, right?
Some day, when you have nothing to do, read Calvin's Institutes. You'll be pretty horrified and you'll forever watch your language when speaking about spirituality.
Here's one: 3.24.8
Immediately, Calvin brings up Jesus’ words in Matthew 22:14: “Many are called, but few are chosen.” Does this not contradict Calvin’s teaching that God calls only the elect, and does this not indicate that God desires many more to be saved than only the elect? Not at all, says Calvin, for
there are two species of calling—there is a universal call, by which God, through the external preaching of the word, invites all men alike, even those for whom He designs the call to be a savour of death, and the ground of a severer condemnation.
Besides this there is a special call which, for the most part, God bestows on believers only, when by the internal illumination of the Spirit He causes the word preached to take deep root in their hearts.7
The “special call,” or efficacious call, which consists of both the preaching of the gospel and the “internal illumination of the Spirit,”8 is for the elect alone. The call in the preaching comes also to many reprobates, but God’s “design” with the call to them is that it be to them a savour of death and the ground of worse condemnation. Calvin does not regard the external call of the gospel as grace to all hearers or as an expression of God’s sincere desire to save all.
As the Lord by the efficacy of His calling accomplishes towards His elect the salvation to which He had by His eternal counsel destined them, so He has judgments against the reprobate, by which He executes His counsel concerning them. Those, therefore, whom He has created for dishonour during life and destruction at death, that they may be vessels of wrath and examples of severity, in bringing to their doom, He at one time deprives of the means of hearing His word, at another by the preaching of it blinds and stupefies them the more.9
source: http://www.cprf.co.uk/articles/calvinsdoctrineofcall.html#.W0orUNUzZOc
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