Wives submit to your husbands

[Axehead]

It's true there are many divorces in the Church today, but I do wonder if feminism is the highest cause of these divorces. I've wondered about the cause myself, and from what I've observed, I think people are just lazy. Things get hard, so they get out. They, neither of them, seem to understand that to 'love' your spouse is to commit to them no matter the circumstances. If it gets hard, you just need to commit and support even more.
As far as feminism....it's possibly the stupidest thing I've ever heard of (the movement...not your mentioning of it!). I'm all for equality...but let's face it....a truly biblical perspective brings 'equality' for women...sure we have different roles, but as equal image bearers of God, we have equal worth. Feminism doesn't seek equality, they seek a reversal of roles. They want to be boss, they want to be able to subjugate males, they want what often comes naturally to women...to take charge and have no one gainsay them. And you know what....I very much doubt even if they got that they would be happy.
But as a woman, I have to say that I love my place. I simply could not do some of the things my husband does, but then, he could not do some of the things I do. I love that the things I CAN do help and support him and make him happy and content to come home after a really hard days work. It's how God intended it to be...same worth, different roles. In the end, it's always better to go with how God designed it!!

Marriage is a picture of our relationship with Christ. Some marriages have no commitment, no faithfulness and no love carrying out marital duties like a robot. They really don't know each other and Christ will say the same thing to many. "Depart from Me, I never knew you". This "knowing" is an intimate knowing as in deep relationship. It is not knowing about you for God knows about all.

Loving your wife more than yourself requires the cross laid out against your flesh life. Same thing with Jesus. So, we can conclude that a relationship with your spouse and with the Lord, take work. They take time (your time) and that requires you to turn away from your own pursuits and engage with your wife (and the Lord).

Axehead

 

[Angelina]

Amen Axehead!
I agree wholeheartedly ^_^

Shalom!

 

[Rex]

NIV this is every verse that contains wife but I would like to post the last before you read the others, It interesting to say the least, a wife has a responsibility as well.

Proverbs 12:4
A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, <<<<<<---------------The man place her above himself he supports her ....BUT
but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.

The last mention of Wife's


Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character

10 [b]A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up while it is still night;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her female servants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.



Pr 2:16
Pr 5:18-20
Pr 6:24
Pr 6:29
Pr 7:5
Pr 12:4
Pr 18:22
Pr 19:13-14
Pr 21:9
Pr 21:19
Pr 23:27
Pr 25:24
Pr 27:15

 

[Selene]

Do you think that churches today are afraid to preach about the roles of a Christian wife? It seems many Christians shy away from this verse. The husband is the head of the wife and she is to obey him.

I don't think this verse is saying that a woman should become a slave or a doormat to her husband. St. Paul was comparing the marriage of man and woman to that of Christ and the Church. Christ is the head of the Church, and Christ served the Church and even gave up his life for her. When Christ came to serve the Church, this does not mean that He put Himself subject under the Church as a servant is under his master. He served the Church out of love for her. A husband is also called to the do the same to his wife. The husband is to protect and give up his life for his wife just as Christ protected and gave up His life for the Church.

Wives, on the other hand, are called to submit to their husband just as the Church submits to Christ. The Church submits to Christ by trusting and having faith in Christ. The Church trusts all the promises that Christ promised to her. In the same way, wives are called to trust and have faith in their husbands in fulfilling the promises they made to them in their marriage vows.

This is what the end of Ephesians 5 says:

Ephesians 5:32-22 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

After reading the entire chapter of Ephesians 5, it is saying that husbands are to love their wives the way Christ loved His Church, and wives are to respect and trust their husbands just as the Church is called to trust and respect Christ. It does not mean that wives are to be a servant to their husbands or a doormat.

 

[Stephen100]

I don't think this verse is saying that a woman should become a slave or a doormat to her husband. St. Paul was comparing the marriage of man and woman to that of Christ and the Church. Christ is the head of the Church, and Christ served the Church and even gave up his life for her. When Christ came to serve the Church, this does not mean that He put Himself subject under the Church as a servant is under his master. He served the Church out of love for her. A husband is also called to the do the same to his wife. The husband is to protect and give up his life for his wife just as Christ protected and gave up His life for the Church.

Wives, on the other hand, are called to submit to their husband just as the Church submits to Christ. The Church submits to Christ by trusting and having faith in Christ. The Church trusts all the promises that Christ promised to her. In the same way, wives are called to trust and have faith in their husbands in fulfilling the promises they made to them in their marriage vows.

This is what the end of Ephesians 5 says:

Ephesians 5:32-22 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

After reading the entire chapter of Ephesians 5, it is saying that husbands are to love their wives the way Christ loved His Church, and wives are to respect and trust their husbands just as the Church is called to trust and respect Christ. It does not mean that wives are to be a servant to their husbands or a doormat.

I agree, but many churches are afraid to teach wives to submit to their husbands. Because of the pervasiveness and acceptance of feminism, even many Christian women hate the idea of submission. But what exactly does it mean to submit anyway? Let me elaborate:

Suppose the wife wanted to watch a chat show--one of those stupid chat shows where feminist women like to slander men. Suppose the husband wasn't happy with his wife watching it, so he asked her not to watch it because it was ungodly. Some would say that the husband was in the right, while others would say that the husband was abusing his authority.

Submit can mean different things to different people.

 

[Angelina]

If say...a wife submits to not watching such a show, even though she enjoys watching it....and let's say the husbands reasons may be that he thinks that it is feminist [that is his opinion] If he thinks that it stops them from communication as a family on a weekly basis. Well that sounds reasonable... :huh:

Now if the wife wants to take the kids out with hubby to go to the park or have some family time but the husband does not because he wants to watch the game....that is unreasonable


See how things can explode into something else??? :huh:

 

[SilenceInMotion]

It's interesting how you turned everything around and turned the attention on the husband. I was talking about the roles of a Christian wife. Also, there are many husbands who love their wives as Christ loved the church, and still their wives will refuse to obey their roles. But why did you try to evade my point? I was pointing out that wives should submit to their husbands because the husband is the head.

That's pretty much how most are when it comes to this subject. They'll put it all on the husband.

There are abusive husbands, sure, but there are far more simply controlling, disobediant wives. It's the consequence of new age feminism. There are an incredible amount of women in which marriage for them is practically a bi-annual thing, because their husbands didn't do this or that, setting their standards to pretty much having everything be about herself and never the interests of who they are with.

There is a very visible problem with many women these days, and you are witnessing how it is consistently evaded.

 

[Stephen100]

If say...a wife submits to not watching such a show, even though she enjoys watching it....and let's say the husbands reasons may be that he thinks that it is feminist [that is his opinion] If he thinks that it stops them from communication as a family on a weekly basis. Well that sounds reasonable... :huh:

Now if the wife wants to take the kids out with hubby to go to the park or have some family time but the husband does not because he wants to watch the game....that is unreasonable


See how things can explode into something else??? :huh:

Ah ha, but remember, the husband is not under his wife's authority or leadership. A husbands job is to love, honor, and protect his wife. If the husband wanted to watch the game, the wife should wait until the game is finished or pick a different day. The wife is a helper. She is to bring happiness to her husbands life, and that means letting him watch the game. A husbands job is to love and protect his wife, even to the point of death.

 

[Angelina]

Oh come on! ^_^ To be under the Lordship of Jesus does not give a man license to have rules set for your partner but not the same applying for yourself! Hehe! There should be unity between wife and husband and they need to agree not be unequally yoked in the sense of one rule applying to the wife and no rules for the husband is that how Jesus loved the Church???

 

[Stephen100]

That's pretty much how most are when it comes to this subject. They'll put it all on the husband.

There are abusive husbands, sure, but there are far more simply controlling, disobediant wives. It's the consequence of new age feminism. There are an incredible amount of women in which marriage for them is practically a bi-annual thing, because their husbands didn't do this or that, setting their standards to pretty much having everything be about herself and never the interests of who they are with.

There is a very visible problem with many women these days, and you are witnessing how it is consistently evaded.

I agree. Ever since I became a Christian, which was nearly 5 years ago, I noticed that this was a very sensitive subject. I noticed that Christians had no problem bashing men over the head and telling them that they must be prepared to die for their wives, but when it came to wives submitting to their husbands, they would try to water it down. They would say that the word submit is a mistranslation, or that it no longer applies to women today.

It all boils down to our culture. In Jesus' day, it was the norm for women to submit to their husband's authority. Everybody understood their roles. But now, because of feminism and government corruption, everything has changed. Instead of sticking to Biblical Scripture, the church has been influenced by the world. That's why many churches embrace homosexuality, fornication, abortion, etc.

The thing is, many Christian women did not become Christians until their twenties or thirties. Before they became Christians they were following the ways of the world. The idea of a wife submitting to her husband's authority was unimaginable. However, in Jesus' day this was the norm. Women, since childhood, was taught that the husband is the head. But today, this seems alien to most women. This is why many Christian women refuse to obey their roles as a godly wife, because prior to becoming a Christian, they grew up despising male authority.

The only way to have a successful and happy marriage is for both men and women to separate themselves from the world and hold firm to Biblical Scripture.

Oh come on! ^_^ To be under the Lordship of Jesus does not give a man license to have rules set for your partner but not the same applying for yourself! Hehe! There should be unity between wife and husband and they need to agree not be unequally yoked in the sense of one rule applying to the wife and no rules for the husband is that how Jesus loved the Church???

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that I'm using double standards. Well okay, if what you say is correct, then I can say that wives should be willing to die for their husbands. The problem is that the Bible does not command wives to do this. Whether you like it or not, there IS a difference in the roles of husbands and wives. Let me elaborate:

Let's pretend I was married. I am the lord of the house. I am also lord of my wife and children, just like Sarah called Abraham lord. Just like Christ is not under the churches authority, husbands are not under the authority of their wives. If the husband wants to watch a game on television, the wife should respect that. If she wants to go to the park, she should wait until the game is finished. The husband is in authority.

Now, I am not ashamed at what I've said, not at all. The reason I'm not ashamed is because I have a bigger burden of responsibility. I must provide for my wife and honor her and love her--even to the point of death. I must carry the burden of responsibility. I must graft and sweat blood.

If my wife cannot even tolerate me watching a game, why would I want to die for her? A man wants a wife that will help and support him.

 

[JB_Reformed Baptist]

I agree. Ever since I became a Christian, which was nearly 5 years ago, I noticed that this was a very sensitive subject. I noticed that Christians had no problem bashing men over the head and telling them that they must be prepared to die for their wives, but when it came to wives submitting to their husbands, they would try to water it down. They would say that the word submit is a mistranslation, or that it no longer applies to women today.

It all boils down to our culture. In Jesus' day, it was the norm for women to submit to their husband's authority. Everybody understood their roles. But now, because of feminism and government corruption, everything has changed. Instead of sticking to Biblical Scripture, the church has been influenced by the world. That's why many churches embrace homosexuality, fornication, abortion, etc.

The thing is, many Christian women did not become Christians until their twenties or thirties. Before they became Christians they were following the ways of the world. The idea of a wife submitting to her husband's authority was unimaginable. However, in Jesus' day this was the norm. Women, since childhood, was taught that the husband is the head. But today, this seems alien to most women. This is why many Christian women refuse to obey their roles as a godly wife, because prior to becoming a Christian, they grew up despising male authority.

The only way to have a successful and happy marriage is for both men and women to separate themselves from the world and hold firm to Biblical Scripture.



I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that I'm using double standards. Well okay, if what you say is correct, then I can say that wives should be willing to die for their husbands. The problem is that the Bible does not command wives to do this. Whether you like it or not, there IS a difference in the roles of husbands and wives. Let me elaborate:

Let's pretend I was married. I am the lord of the house. I am also lord of my wife and children, just like Sarah called Abraham lord. Just like Christ is not under the churches authority, husbands are not under the authority of their wives. If the husband wants to watch a game on television, the wife should respect that. If she wants to go to the part, she should wait until the game is finished. The husband is in authority.

Now, I am not ashamed at what I've said, not at all. The reason I'm not ashamed is because I have a bigger burden of responsibility. I must provide for my wife and honor her and love her--even to the point of death. I must carry the burden of responsibility. I must graft and sweat blood.

If my wife cannot even tolerate me watching a game, why would I want to die for her? A man wants a wife that will help and support him.

I agree. Ever since I became a Christian, which was nearly 5 years ago, I noticed that this was a very sensitive subject. I noticed that Christians had no problem bashing men over the head and telling them that they must be prepared to die for their wives, but when it came to wives submitting to their husbands, they would try to water it down. They would say that the word submit is a mistranslation, or that it no longer applies to women today.

It all boils down to our culture. In Jesus' day, it was the norm for women to submit to their husband's authority. Everybody understood their roles. But now, because of feminism and government corruption, everything has changed. Instead of sticking to Biblical Scripture, the church has been influenced by the world. That's why many churches embrace homosexuality, fornication, abortion, etc.

The thing is, many Christian women did not become Christians until their twenties or thirties. Before they became Christians they were following the ways of the world. The idea of a wife submitting to her husband's authority was unimaginable. However, in Jesus' day this was the norm. Women, since childhood, was taught that the husband is the head. But today, this seems alien to most women. This is why many Christian women refuse to obey their roles as a godly wife, because prior to becoming a Christian, they grew up despising male authority.

The only way to have a successful and happy marriage is for both men and women to separate themselves from the world and hold firm to Biblical Scripture.



I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that I'm using double standards. Well okay, if what you say is correct, then I can say that wives should be willing to die for their husbands. The problem is that the Bible does not command wives to do this. Whether you like it or not, there IS a difference in the roles of husbands and wives. Let me elaborate:

Let's pretend I was married. I am the lord of the house. I am also lord of my wife and children, just like Sarah called Abraham lord. Just like Christ is not under the churches authority, husbands are not under the authority of their wives. If the husband wants to watch a game on television, the wife should respect that. If she wants to go to the part, she should wait until the game is finished. The husband is in authority.

Now, I am not ashamed at what I've said, not at all. The reason I'm not ashamed is because I have a bigger burden of responsibility. I must provide for my wife and honor her and love her--even to the point of death. I must carry the burden of responsibility. I must graft and sweat blood.

If my wife cannot even tolerate me watching a game, why would I want to die for her? A man wants a wife that will help and support him.

LOL!. Now you're stirring the pot.

 

[Stephen100]

LOL!. Now you're stirring the pot.

I'm not. I am very serious.

 

[JB_Reformed Baptist]

I'm not. I am very serious.

I'm not. I am very serious.

Why would you be serious, when you're not married. Or is it your family(parents) having problems?

 

[Stephen100]

Why would you be serious, when you're not married. Or is it your family(parents) having problems?

I am serious because it's not often Christians are willing to tell the truth regarding this subject. Even though I'm not married I still like to voice my opinion. I'm also interested in other people's opinion, because I would like to see how many other Christians agree with me.

 

[Angelina]

You seem to expect high standards for women as a Christian wife and no standard for yourself. Good luck with that.. :unsure:

Shalom!

 

[Stephen100]

I don't even want a wife. Single is best.

 

[JB_Reformed Baptist]

I am serious because it's not often Christians are willing to tell the truth regarding this subject. Even though I'm not married I still like to voice my opinion. I'm also interested in other people's opinion, because I would like to see how many other Christians agree with me.

I think whether others agree or see it your way -as nice as it may be - in the end is superfluous. Why, because the word of God has set the standard for marriage relationships and that cannot be altered, without an ever increasing decay within the marriage and society as a whole.

Whilst we may be striving for unity in the faith the stark reality is we're all at different stages of growth/maturity/faithfulness in our life.

Whilst I may hold some what to the old path in regards to marriage and headship. I'm some what of an enigma. For instance whilst I hold to the scripture that wives should be a keeper at home the scripture also indicates that a wife can work, albeit part-time. i.e. Proverbs 31ff. not necessary here primary focus.

So in-fact a wife's duties can encompass a wider spectrum than one may have been traditionally taught. Rather, the scripture seems to indicate a concentric pattern exists. Home-> church (good deeds)-> working(part-time), if capable or indeed if applicable.

Food for thought.

NB: If at any stage a husband requires or demands from his wife something that is clearly contrary to the teachings of Christ, she is under NO duty to adhere to it. Even though she may meekly acknowledge his request or demand.

 

[soupy]

Stephen, I think you've been in the wrong churches if you see them reluctant to teach the Bible.

...and around the wrong people who are criticizing their mate and refusing to obey the Bible.

 

[JB_Reformed Baptist]

Love and Respect go together. It is difficult to respect someone that does not love you.

Don't just put this on women. It is a two way street. I know many that bear their cross and respect their husband even though he does not lay down his life for them as Christ did for the church.

Yes, there are some that do not show their husband any respect and the thing is, they want to, but they have been hurt by his lack of love.

Col 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

Let's start with the leader of the home. Do you think churches are afraid to call men on the carpet who are abusing their wives and not showing love? Demanding obedience from someone without demonstrating whole hearted love for them, is not what God had in mind.

Eph 5:24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

We are able to subject ourselves to Christ because He laid down His life for us and has our best interests at heart.

I guarantee you that if a husband lays down his life for his wife as Christ did for the Church and demonstrates to his bride that he absolutely has her best interests at heart, she will respect him and subject herself to his leadership because she trusts him and knows he loves her with a love that will not defraud her (take advantage of her). Yet, many bear a cross of respecting an unloving and abusive husband.

By the way God did not put the following verse in the Bible for men. So you men out there, just ignore it and make believe it is not there and don't use it against your wife. This scripture is for them, not you. Leave it alone.
Eph 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

These verses are for you, husbands:

Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
Eph 5:26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
Eph 5:27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
Eph 5:28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

If you love yourself, be nice to your wife.

Axehead

Actually, how a man love's himself determines how he will relate to his wife. But, love yourself you know doubt will, even if it's distorted.

 

[Selene]

Ah ha, but remember, the husband is not under his wife's authority or leadership. A husbands job is to love, honor, and protect his wife. If the husband wanted to watch the game, the wife should wait until the game is finished or pick a different day. The wife is a helper. She is to bring happiness to her husbands life, and that means letting him watch the game. A husbands job is to love and protect his wife, even to the point of death.

It's true that the husband is not under his wife's authority or leadership.....and a good wife who trusts and has faith in her husband becomes the crown on her husband's head. A woman who desires to take the title of her husband as "Head of the family" is a woman who does not trust or has faith in her husband because she thinks she can do a better job as "Head of the family."

Proverbs 12:4 A virtuous woman [is] a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed [is] as rottenness in his bones.

If a man loves his wife, he will serve her out of love just as Christ served the Church out of love. And the woman will have no problems being obedient and trusting of her husband. But if the husband is selfish and thinks only of himself, then it would be difficult for his wife to trust him. This means that if the husband cares more about his game than the feelings of his wife...then he is being selfish. You are correct that the man is supposed to love his wife even to the point of death. That means.....the man must sacrifice the game. Be glad that it's only a game. After all, Christ sacrificed His life for His bride.