I guess I understand the surface reason, but I'm interested in what you, who have dealt with family members/close friends who are addicted, have to say about anything to do with this area of the dynamics of addiction.
I have a family member, a younger sibling, who I was very close with from early on until around their time in college, where I believe their addictions/habits really solidified.
They are addicted to alcohol and ritalin/stratera/adderall drugs. I do see how they have formulated a logic to their use of the drugs to help them do their job, and I, personally, am of the belief, from my own experience, that anybody who uses any type of stimulant on a regular basis will experience very strong cravings for a downer chemical; in this case, alcohol.
I believe the mind/body becomes so taxed by the upper that it craves rest and some opposite chemical to provide that rest, or at least balance itself out more.
Because I have tried the hardest to get through to this sibling about their drug/alc use, they have banned me from their life; banned all communication and conducted a many-years-long smear campaign against me to all other family members, as well as mutual friends. This has not been a fruitless effort on their part. They have permanently damaged multiple relationships of mine and caused massive pain, stress and anxiety in me.
One of the main topics I'd like to discuss is all of the gaslighting tactics these type of addicts employ. This person lies constantly and often accuses me of doing the very things they are doing, which I am not doing. They've convinced themselves that I am a bad, evil person and relentlessly speak to me as such, as well as to others about me.
They've made an unspoken rule that we are not allowed to ever speak of anything they do, or have done, wrong and never speak of anything to do with their use of drugs/alc to them. We are punished with text message attacks, sometimes all throughout the middle of the night - often months/years after the "offense", as well as excommunication for long periods if we break these rules. I sometimes will go along with it for short periods because I value communication with this younger sibling and love them very much (at least the person they were before the substance issues), but I am forced at times to address certain actions/behaviors because I refuse to accept that they should be allowed to never experience any consequences for their behavior; and often times their behavior is hurtful or damaging to our elderly parents.
This person's idea of making amends is for you to sit quietly and allow them to criticize, insult and accuse you of all manner of nonsense, and you must apologize for all things they've deemed you guilty of, some from years back, until they have satisfied themselves.
I have read, in my research upon this topic, that long term users of alcohol exist in a certifiable state of insanity. I am convinced, and saddened, that this is accurate.
I'm not sure I can narrow this down to any specific questions, besides that of the title, but I would very much appreciate any feedback on these aspects of addiction.
Thank you.
I have a family member, a younger sibling, who I was very close with from early on until around their time in college, where I believe their addictions/habits really solidified.
They are addicted to alcohol and ritalin/stratera/adderall drugs. I do see how they have formulated a logic to their use of the drugs to help them do their job, and I, personally, am of the belief, from my own experience, that anybody who uses any type of stimulant on a regular basis will experience very strong cravings for a downer chemical; in this case, alcohol.
I believe the mind/body becomes so taxed by the upper that it craves rest and some opposite chemical to provide that rest, or at least balance itself out more.
Because I have tried the hardest to get through to this sibling about their drug/alc use, they have banned me from their life; banned all communication and conducted a many-years-long smear campaign against me to all other family members, as well as mutual friends. This has not been a fruitless effort on their part. They have permanently damaged multiple relationships of mine and caused massive pain, stress and anxiety in me.
One of the main topics I'd like to discuss is all of the gaslighting tactics these type of addicts employ. This person lies constantly and often accuses me of doing the very things they are doing, which I am not doing. They've convinced themselves that I am a bad, evil person and relentlessly speak to me as such, as well as to others about me.
They've made an unspoken rule that we are not allowed to ever speak of anything they do, or have done, wrong and never speak of anything to do with their use of drugs/alc to them. We are punished with text message attacks, sometimes all throughout the middle of the night - often months/years after the "offense", as well as excommunication for long periods if we break these rules. I sometimes will go along with it for short periods because I value communication with this younger sibling and love them very much (at least the person they were before the substance issues), but I am forced at times to address certain actions/behaviors because I refuse to accept that they should be allowed to never experience any consequences for their behavior; and often times their behavior is hurtful or damaging to our elderly parents.
This person's idea of making amends is for you to sit quietly and allow them to criticize, insult and accuse you of all manner of nonsense, and you must apologize for all things they've deemed you guilty of, some from years back, until they have satisfied themselves.
I have read, in my research upon this topic, that long term users of alcohol exist in a certifiable state of insanity. I am convinced, and saddened, that this is accurate.
I'm not sure I can narrow this down to any specific questions, besides that of the title, but I would very much appreciate any feedback on these aspects of addiction.
Thank you.
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