Disappointed ?
No. Not understanding some things yes but that comes with spiritual growth. We begin as babes, then toddlers, children, teenagers, young adults, adults, mature adults, grandparents etc...... And there is a direct correlation of time we put in and what we get from studying and applying Gods word to our life. We are disciples( learners, apprenticeship ) and we learn and grow day by day, week by week, year by year, decade by decade. Scripture uses terms /phrases like running the race, being a soldier , a builder, fighting the good fight, enduring , cultivating, study thyself to be approved and many other things that our daily life can relate to in the spiritual life. Things like thirsting after God like a deer pants for the water-brook, hunger for the word and being nourished by it, obedience, submission to the Lord, denying self among many other such things. It is a never ending quest of seeking first His kingdom and His Righteousness and trusting in Him. We are promised a difficult time in this world its not easy, there could be persecution and suffering as we stand for the Lord. But in all these things we can be more than conquerors through Christ. Trials/ testings will come along with temptations but He has provided a way of escape for us that we might be able to endure them. He promises us His peace in all circumstances as we trust in Him and not ourselves, our money, status, retirement etc....... All those things are temporal but his kingdom, His will is eternal. We set our minds on the things above not on the things of this earth that perish. We are citizens of heaven and strangers and aliens in this world. This world is not our home we are just passing through. We are transforming our minds daily and not being conformed to the ways of this world. And by this we prove what the will of God is that which is good and acceptable. I'm just paraphrasing scripture above and what the christian life is all about. We are all called to be His witnesses and we all have a testimony that can be shared with unbelievers. Some plant seed, others water, some till the ground, others reap the harvest but we all play a part in the process. We are salt and light in this world so even though we might not say anything our good deeds, how we act and live tells a lost world we are His disciples ( all men will know we are by our love for one another and how we love our neighbor) and march to a different drummer.
The Christian life is never boring and there is always something new we can learn each and every day. As long as we feed ourselves we will grow. Our relationship with God and its growth has a 1 to 1 correlation to the amount of quality time we spend and invest with the Lord through His word and prayer. He speaks to us though His word and us to Him through prayer. As long as its a priority to develop that relationship then God through His Holy Spirit will lead and guide you into the truth. If God is an afterthought then we will be tossed around to and fro by every wind of doctrine. I could ramble on and on about this but this is my summary off the top of my head. I was just typing as I was thinking. This can be a great place so just pray for discernment. This is just my 2 cents fwiw.
hope this helps !!!
