Just curious....

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TLHKAJ

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This isn't a traumatic memory, but some of it has implications into MK. This is an example of a "good memory" that I can look at without being overridden with the negative (while still acknowledging the truth related to MK).

Bear with me....
I remember what my older sister and I got for Christmas when I was 2 (and she was 4).

From our parents, we both got our own baby dolls and bassinets. And we got a little table and chairs set to share. From an aunt and uncle, I got a Mickey Mouse plaque (made of plaster) ... Mickey's face on a pink background. My sister got Donald Duck ...the face on a baby blue background.

Now, I know that seeing Mickey on my wall was to be a subconscious reminder that "Mickey" was always watching. Mickey was Lt Col Michael Aquino, a top illuminati MK programmer. My sister's "Donald" was also a subconscious reminder of a programmer/handler.

When I was smack dab in middle of deprogramming, I overheard an alter (inside) saying... "It's time to see the Colonel." Aquino had different code names ...one was "Mickey" and one was "the Colonel."

Btw .... I'm not retraumatized by remembering these things. They are just true events and the ......wow....WOW, I have to interrupt this to say ....I am watching a homesteading video on my Roku and a Disney commercial came on just now as I was typing this, lol ....whose face is plastered first on the screen? ....none other than "Mickey." Anyway ....Aquino is no longer with us!! lol

Back to my regularly scheduled sharing.....lol.....
Those are true events, and I can share them without feeling retraumatized. Now ...if I am sharing and I begin to sense fear, pain, trauma ... that's a perfect opportunity to bring it back to Him and allow Him to bring deeper healing! He wants us to walk in truth and not fear! :)

 
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TLHKAJ

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@Mantis Well, I guess so.....
This is why He places so much importance on children, childhood, and parents bringing up children in His ways. I'm not saying your parents were bad. But I'm reminded of how over and over in scripture, we are told that God hears our cries, He sees our tears, and stores them in a bottle. He remembers ......

Edit: this was supposed to quote @Mantis. My apologies....
 
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TLHKAJ

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My earliest memory was probably as a toddler. I was in a big house and my mom brought me a spinning top and one of those springy slingy things.

And also my mom and my grandmother used to sing me the song "You Are My Sunshine."
Sweet. :)
 
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GaryAnderson

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Okay... I have 2 curious questions that may seem odd. Idk if I'll have any takers. lol

1.What is your earliest memory?

2. Do you remember the layout of the home your family lived in when you were 1 yr old?


I remember my childhood vividly. I had a wonderful childhood. My first memory was around 2-3 years old in my grandparent’s house and on the table there were fruit, apples and oranges. I reached out to the edge of the table to grab one, and an apple fell in my head. That moment I became aware of my existence.
I remember the house very vividly too. 2 bedrooms and one kitchen.

Along the lines of "memory" ...have you ever gone on a trip and (being a passenger), you fall asleep and somewhere inside you recognize you're about to arrive at your destination by the turns in the road (before you open your eyes)?


Yes this has happened to me a couple of times.
 
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Hidden In Him

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And also my mom and my grandmother used to sing me the song "You Are My Sunshine."

HEY! Now that brings back a good memory. I used to visit with my great grandmother, the only Christian in the family. She would play Monopoly with me and always let me win, and then we'd sing, "The Little Train That Could," and get all excited at the end when he did, Lol.
 

TLHKAJ

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My first memory was around 2-3 years old in my grandparent’s house and on the table there were fruit, apples and oranges. I reached out to the edge of the table to grab one, and an apple fell in my head. That moment I became aware of my existence.
Sir ...Isaac Newton? Haha!
Yes, you had to be small for not reaching the tabletop very well. :)

I have a similar memory ...but will share in a separate post. :)
 

TLHKAJ

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@GaryAnderson I wanted to let your post be what it was and share this separately.

I have always had this memory (since I was small), of being taken to a military base. I always remember it being night time when I was taken there, walking hand in hand with a man of large build and large stature.

This one particular time, I was taken there for a specific reason ....this was "think tank" stuff where MK programmers bring their successes and show them off to each other and share ideas. Kinda a brag session, more or less. (They are very prideful!!)

So they brought me there and I don't remember any of the bad stuff (although it's a given that bad things happened). But the next morning, I'm walking down the halls toward the cafeteria (or whatever it's called). People are looking at me in passing, smiling, and greeting me by name.....pats on the head and such. Then I get to the counter to tell the lady what I wanted to eat ....she smiles and greets me by name. But my head was barely up to where I could see over the counter. I was somewhere around age 4.
 
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farouk

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HEY! Now that brings back a good memory. I used to visit with my great grandmother, the only Christian in the family. She would play Monopoly with me and always let me win, and then we'd sing, "The Little Train That Could," and get all excited at the end when he did, Lol.
@Hidden In Him I'm sure your great-grandmother's prayers have been a source of blessing for your family....
 

TLHKAJ

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I have several memories from when I was about four years old. They are the earliest memories I have. One is playing with the next door neighbor girl, Robin, who was about my age. I did not like her for some reason. After we moved a few years later I learned she had gotten hit and killed by a car out in front of her house by a drunk driver. Her older sister is Bambi. She grew up to be the infamous female marine who got kicked out of the service for posing for Playboy Magazine in the 80's (I think that's when it was). We have family photos of her as a young teen at a birthday party we were having at our house. Her older brother, Ronnie, was a jerk and one time he was taunting me and I chased him every time he did that, but he could outrun me. Finally, when chasing him I slipped and fell in a puddle in a grassy low spot in the empty lot on the other side of our house and was embarrassed in front of the whole neighborhood. I went home completely soaked.
It sounds like you somehow knew or sensed something wasn't right in that family.
 
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Brakelite

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Okay... I have 2 curious questions that may seem odd. Idk if I'll have any takers. lol

1.What is your earliest memory?

2. Do you remember the layout of the home your family lived in when you were 1 yr old?
I have some early memories, and remember my first home as well as if I still live there. I did live there from a baby till I was 17, so, there's that.
But I remember 2 major events but have no idea how old I was...a new carpet arriving for the living room. I remember it was a birthday or Christmas gift from dad to mum, a red patterned Persian pattern type concoction which mum loved. The second was an addition to the dining room. An add on porch or sun room. This was used for several purposes...mAh jong games with the neighbors... Naps in the daytime for parents... Sewing room... And my father's gun collection on the wall. I also remember it well because it was where I found my dad when I returned home from school at age 12... He had died in his sleep.
 
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Lambano

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Back to my regularly scheduled sharing.....lol.....
Those are true events, and I can share them without feeling retraumatized. Now ...if I am sharing and I begin to sense fear, pain, trauma ... that's a perfect opportunity to bring it back to Him and allow Him to bring deeper healing! He wants us to walk in truth and not fear
It feels like the Great Physician has just given me a front row seat to watch His healing work.

(Whispers a quiet prayer of thanks.)
 
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dev553344

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Okay... I have 2 curious questions that may seem odd. Idk if I'll have any takers. lol

1.What is your earliest memory?

2. Do you remember the layout of the home your family lived in when you were 1 yr old?
My earliest memory is 2 years old and I remember the layout of the house.
 
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TLHKAJ

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It feels like the Great Physician has just given me a front row seat to watch His healing work.

(Whispers a quiet prayer of thanks.)
I'm curious what you believe you're seeing.
 

TLHKAJ

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May I ask why you chose to start a thread on early childhood memories?

It’s good that you can talk about it now without flicking scar tissue.
It was mainly just a curiosity, because although I have had an extensive amount of trauma from in the womb, I still have early childhood memories.

I have a sort of insider's understanding of how the mind, brain, and memories work. It's very complex. I was trained at a young age (sad to say) by my programmers, many things related to trauma and its effects on the brain to induce dissociation. And through my years of healing, I have learned how the mind/brain works to protect itself through dissociation, and storing away memories into files, very much like a computer. And those files often act like a cache on a computer....they are there for quick access when needed, then stored away (out of sight, out of mind) when not in use. So it's like you don't remember the info in those files, until you need to.

When there has been extensive trauma to the point of shattering one's mind (creating alter personalities), each part (or alter personality) has a different set of files. And sometimes alters share certain files (memory). For me, I had to learn how to access files (memory) and hold onto that information rather than just use the "quick cache" system ....of only accessing info as needed, then releasing it. I was only one part of the whole and so shattered, I had hundreds of thousands of alter personalities. God has brought much healing, integration, etc! And the healing continues.

Goodness, I could go on and on. And it's quite complex. I'
m not sure I'm explaining this very well.
 
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TLHKAJ

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Someone with a fairly untraumatic history should have childhood memories. And not everyone is exactly the same. But one of the telltale indications that something's amiss is when a person has zero or almost no childhood memories ....and gaps in teen years and early adulthood, and even gaps in their more recent personal history.

A study into the infant brain shows that infants naturally dissociate, yet without walls of amnesia. When you see a baby smiling and getting excited by looking at mommy's face, and then they look away ....it is because their brain hasn't built the capacity for joy and they become overstimulated. This is dissociation without amnesia.
They look away ....then they turn and seek out mommy's face smiling again, and the process begins again....joy builds up, baby is overwhelmed, looks away ....then finds mommy's face again. Each time, their brain is building capacity for joy. It's a good thing. And science proves that a brain's level and capacity for joy is equivalent to the amount of negative (stress, trauma, pain, etc) they can process. (This verifies ....."the joy of the Lord is your strength!")

So an infant growing up in a loving, safe, nurturing environment is so very important.

What happens when a baby is raised in a healthy, safe, loving, nurturing environment? Their brain develops integrity in a way that their level and capacity for joy is nice and high. The natural dissociation is not needed anymore once they grow into early childhood and adolescence.

But what happens when an infant is raised in a stressful and/or abusive environment? Their natural ability to dissociate kicks in. There is no safety outside, so their mind uses that ability to dissociate in order to survive, and because of the lack of "joy" (love, nurture, etc) the mind's integrity is compromised ....it breaks and shatters, and forms amnesic walls around traumatic memories.
 
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TLHKAJ

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Aside from all of that ....I believe it's good to hear other people's reminiscings. It can be therapeutic. It can also be a good exercise for the brain to make connections by remembering one's own history.
 

Brakelite

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My wife had a traumatic childhood. One particular incident as a two year old scarred her for life, literally and emotionally. Then by happenstance, or providence, we found ourselves living just a few miles from the home where that that incident took place. Neither of us knew this when we moved there. That information came to my wife a few years after we had arrived. As a 2yo she had no idea where the house was, it wasn't her own family home, but she was staying at an aunts. Upon finding out the location, she wanted to see the house. She had directions, and had a description, but we couldn't find it. It would have already been an old home 50 years previously, even older when we looked, so we surmised it had either burnt down, fell down, or demolished. All that was there were farmland and a couple of much newer homes in it's place. But the fact my wife was willing to return there, was healing. Or at least contributed to the process which continues today. She has progressed infinitely beyond from where she was when I first met her at 19.
 
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