From the way I understand what you are saying, I think we are saying the same thing. Of course I don't advocate following the Law legalistically or for righteousness. But if we are righteous following Him we will tend to emulate that same Law. For new comers to the faith, the Law gives one a direction as to what God expects in which the convert will see himself or herself indeed "following" it when they follow Christ.
Clarity is needed when you refer to the Law, seeing how you are saying that God has expectations on the believers.
I know we will be held accountable to what we sow towards; the works of the flesh or the fruits of the Spirit, but I regard that standard of judgment as not on me to achieve when I am trusting the Lord as my Good Shepherd to correct me when I go astray, getting involved in something I should not be or watching something even though I am trying to avoid the worldly influence in it by fastforwarding it. A dream warned me that I was failing and so I had returned the dvd back to the library the next day without continuing to watch it towards the end and the next season of it too. So He is doing a really great job helping me walk through this valley of death & I thank Him for it. This is what I am trusting Him for.
My issue is with those who say "we are not under the Law" interprets it to mean "no human can keep it so why try?" and "do as you want" approach. And they even go one step further as to say "those Laws are not in effect any longer" thus nullifying the pragmatic definition of righteousness because where there is no Law, there is no sin. If they are not aligning themselves with the commandments, then they are deceiving themselves.
You need to address those who say these things to be clear in how they are applying the scripture.
Romans 3:19 Now we know that what things soever the law saith, it saith to them who are under the law: that every mouth may be stopped, and all the world may become guilty before God.20 Therefore by the deeds of the law there shall no flesh be justified in his sight: for by the law is the knowledge of sin.21 But now the righteousness of God without the law is manifested, being witnessed by the law and the prophets;22 Even the righteousness of God which is by faith of Jesus Christ unto all and upon all them that believe: for there is no difference:
If they say that no human can keep the law so why try it? then they may be thinking of these verses above. They are right if they are referring to how they even live as His because being under the law in trying to keep them by their religious flesh in doing the best they can is vain as Galatians 3rd chapter had addressed.
But if they really mean to say I can live in sin so why repent? Then they fail to see why Jesus had to come; to deliver them from living in sin; to destroy the works of the devil in their lives so that they are free to follow Him and walk with Him in the light to maintain that fellowship with the Father & the Son so that their joy may be full.
The Law under the Old Covenant does not help us to follow Him. Jesus helps us to abide in His words in the New Covenant to follow Him when we trust Him as our Good Shepherd and not just as our Saviour.
When most believers refer to the Law, they usually are hyping on keeping the sabbath day, yet disregarding His words in Matthew 12:1-8 as to why believers are blameless for not keeping the sabbath day.
So it is about our identity. How are we identify as His? By faith in Jesus Christ or by our identity in keeping the Law? Do they know we are christians by our love or do they see us as looking to others in being serious in being good and to do good when Jesus testified that no matter how much the spirit is willing, the flesh is weak.... so why look to them to be serious when we are to look to Him in professing Him that He is serious in helping them to follow Him and live as His so that not only sinners will place their hopes in Him, but suffering believers and religious believers shall also.
That is the only way we can know Him & the power of His resurrection when we stop looking to the Law to help us to do good, but trust Jesus Christ to help us to be good and do good for which we shall praise Him even more in Heaven for and noy just for our salvation.