Love Beyond Belief: Dating an Atheist and Nurturing Spiritual Conversations

[Rheeder]

I've recently found my home in Jesus Christ and I am forever grateful. I often pray for things in my life that are not meant for me to be taken away or for my eyes to be opened. My boyfriend is an atheist, it didn't bother me at first as I was not religious at the time. I have spoken to him about it and raised my concerns that there might come a time where I can no longer be with him. He is understanding about it. I also have discussions about Christianity with him on a regular basis, he likes to talk and listen about my experiences and the changes it has made to my life. He is willing to be open to it. I am afraid he will only try for the sake of our relationship and create a false belief, I don't want him to believe just for me but for the unconditional love of Jesus Christ and everything good that it entails. I want our relationship to grow in the love of Jesus Christ and celebrate it together. I pray for him and I am going to teach him how to pray. His reason for being an atheist is logic. He does not believe in things that he can't see or touch. It is not his fault. I want to see him being saved, not for me but for him.

 

[L.A.M.B.]

Welcome to Christianity Boards.
Praying for you to be led of God and he to be saved!

 

[MatthewG]

I've recently found my home in Jesus Christ and I am forever grateful. I often pray for things in my life that are not meant for me to be taken away or for my eyes to be opened. My boyfriend is an atheist, it didn't bother me at first as I was not religious at the time. I have spoken to him about it and raised my concerns that there might come a time where I can no longer be with him. He is understanding about it. I also have discussions about Christianity with him on a regular basis, he likes to talk and listen about my experiences and the changes it has made to my life. He is willing to be open to it. I am afraid he will only try for the sake of our relationship and create a false belief, I don't want him to believe just for me but for the unconditional love of Jesus Christ and everything good that it entails. I want our relationship to grow in the love of Jesus Christ and celebrate it together. I pray for him and I am going to teach him how to pray. His reason for being an atheist is logic. He does not believe in things that he can't see or touch. It is not his fault. I want to see him being saved, not for me but for him.

May Yahava guide you to doing what is right, and be kind and gentle to the other. Just always remember that when two people become one, that is marriage in God's sight. Perhaps it is a good thing to save oneself for that special day ; and continue to grow in learning and having a loving relationship with your chosen partner. Hope that he will come to the light, and find rest in the Lord Yeshua as well, for his own sake.

 

[Windmillcharge]

His reason for being an atheist is logic. He does not believe in things that he can't see or touch. It is not his fault. I want to see him being saved, not for me but for him

Welcome to the forum.
Your boy friends reason for not believing is logic, he does not believe in things he cannot see or touch.
May I suggest that you introduce him to reasonable faith Web site.
It is run by a Professor of Philosophy and his q+a page is full of logical questions and answers that demonstrate the reasonableness of faith in God.
There are also videos of his debates with atheists.
Or show him this site and the long list of arguments for God, all based on science, for him to read and refute.

Physicist Michael Strauss discusses Christianity and science at Stanford University

This is one of my favorite lectures. The lecture: Dr. Strauss delivered this lecture at Stanford University in 1999. It is fairly easy to understand, and it even includes useful dating tips. Here i…

winteryknight.com

Lastly take him to church with you.
It is no5 enough to argue and pray, he needs to be exposed to Christians,vto experiences live worship and fellowship with believers.

God is capable of saving him because of your prayers, but the more his brain and thoughts are engaged by the reasons for God, with the truth of the Bible, the real experience of worship at church and the friendship with other Christian men the harder it is for the devil to confuse him and snatch away what will save him.

 

[quietthinker]

I've recently found my home in Jesus Christ and I am forever grateful. I often pray for things in my life that are not meant for me to be taken away or for my eyes to be opened. My boyfriend is an atheist, it didn't bother me at first as I was not religious at the time. I have spoken to him about it and raised my concerns that there might come a time where I can no longer be with him. He is understanding about it. I also have discussions about Christianity with him on a regular basis, he likes to talk and listen about my experiences and the changes it has made to my life. He is willing to be open to it. I am afraid he will only try for the sake of our relationship and create a false belief, I don't want him to believe just for me but for the unconditional love of Jesus Christ and everything good that it entails. I want our relationship to grow in the love of Jesus Christ and celebrate it together. I pray for him and I am going to teach him how to pray. His reason for being an atheist is logic. He does not believe in things that he can't see or touch. It is not his fault. I want to see him being saved, not for me but for him.

Hello Rheeder,
I have found this bunch of essays helpful in learning about God. It has helped me in understanding the Gospel and how I share it with others.
You might be interested?

 

[Rita]

Hi Rheeder
I came to faith three years into my marriage, I can relate to you having the desire to share that spiritual live, and love of Jesus with your boy friend. For me it just didn’t happen and we were often on different pages with morals and choices. It does make it difficult at times, and I can well understand why scripture warns us of being yoked to a non believer.
However I must say that Gods grace enabled me to get through the 27years. Sadly my marriage didn’t survive, and he blamed my faith, but the reality was it was his unfaithfulness.
We remained friends until he passed away four years ago.
I hope you move forward and rely on the Lord to help you through what ever the future holds. God can and does move in peoples hearts, my son was an atheist and came to faith two years ago ( he was 28 years old )
Muchlove
Rita

 

[VictoryinJesus]

I've recently found my home in Jesus Christ and I am forever grateful. I often pray for things in my life that are not meant for me to be taken away or for my eyes to be opened. My boyfriend is an atheist, it didn't bother me at first as I was not religious at the time. I have spoken to him about it and raised my concerns that there might come a time where I can no longer be with him. He is understanding about it. I also have discussions about Christianity with him on a regular basis, he likes to talk and listen about my experiences and the changes it has made to my life. He is willing to be open to it. I am afraid he will only try for the sake of our relationship and create a false belief, I don't want him to believe just for me but for the unconditional love of Jesus Christ and everything good that it entails. I want our relationship to grow in the love of Jesus Christ and celebrate it together. I pray for him and I am going to teach him how to pray. His reason for being an atheist is logic. He does not believe in things that he can't see or touch. It is not his fault. I want to see him being saved, not for me but for him.

You title makes me think of loving beyond belief. That is the love Christ has for us …a love which reaches beyond belief…in He first loved us while we were yet in sin.

 

[Pearl]

Hi Rheeder
I came to faith three years into my marriage, I can relate to you having the desire to share that spiritual live, and love of Jesus with your boy friend. For me it just didn’t happen and we were often on different pages with morals and choices. It does make it difficult at times, and I can well understand why scripture warns us of being yoked to a non believer.
However I must say that Gods grace enabled me to get through the 27years. Sadly my marriage didn’t survive, and he blamed my faith, but the reality was it was his unfaithfulness.
We remained friends until he passed away four years ago.
I hope you move forward and rely on the Lord to help you through what ever the future holds. God can and does move in peoples hearts, my son was an atheist and came to faith two years ago ( he was 28 years old )
Muchlove
Rita

If after you've been together for a while one of you comes to faith is a lot different from knowingly choosing to marry or be with a person who does not believe.

 

[Rita]

If after you've been together for a while one of you comes to faith is a lot different from knowingly choosing to marry or be with a person who does not believe.

If Rheeder has been in a relationship for awhile in many respects they are committed to one another, they are already yoked together ( just my opinion ) I just see things differently and I don’t feel that I have the right to say what is right for her and her boyfriend.

 

[Ritajanice]

I just thank God, my marriage had already ended before I was Born Again....I could never live, as in married with an unbeliever, I talk God all the time.

I can most definitely relate to Rita and her marriage to an unbeliever....my word, I can’t imagine how difficult that must have been....as she said...only God’s Grace could have got her through that...

Praying for you @Rheeder , thanks for sharing.

 

[MatthewG]

There are verses in the bible that state that people can be in relationships with non-believers. I think that is really amazing. I haven't sought or seeked out an relationship in a long time, for me I would desire to have a woman of understand which the LORD can provide, that loves God and loves others, maybe one day, but then again perhaps its better to stay abstention.

 

[Rita]

I just thank God, my marriage had already ended before I was Born Again....I could never live, as in married with an unbeliever, I talk God all the time.

I can most definitely relate to Rita and her marriage to an unbeliever....my word, I can’t imagine how difficult that must have been....as she said...only God’s Grace could have got her through that...

Praying for you @Rheeder , thanks for sharing.

Please it doesn’t need a sad emoji - i have four wonderful children and years of experiencing Gods hand on my life - I am who I am today because of those years. I don’t live with regrets because God ultimately proved Romans 8:28 to be true.

 

[Rockerduck]

Hello Rheeder,
I was married to a non-believer myself too. It didn't survive and she never came to Christ. Trust me, any relationship between and non-believer and a Christian will not survive because there will be a point of contention that will be unreconcilable. God warns of this.

2 Corinthians 6:14 - Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness; And what communion has light with darkness.

 

[Ritajanice]

Please it doesn’t need a sad emoji - i have four wonderful children and years of experiencing Gods hand on my life - I am who I am today because of those years. I don’t live with regrets because God ultimately proved Romans 8:28 to be true.

Yes, I was just voicing my opinion, that was all, I could not imagine living with a non believer...it would destroy me, God also blessed me with 3 wonderful sons.....I also thank him for the abuse I suffered throughout my life, ..he’s made me the person he wants me to be now...and I’m most definitely in his hands.

I will delete the sad emoji as it upsets you so much...I just saw the difficulty that you must have gone through, living with an unbeliever, that was all.

I think it’s a shame that you took the sad emoji personally.

 

[Ritajanice]

Hello Rheeder,
I was married to a non-believer myself too. It didn't survive and she never came to Christ. Trust me, any relationship between and non-believer and a Christian will not survive because there will be a point of contention that will be unreconcilable. God warns of this.

2 Corinthians 6:14 - Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness; And what communion has light with darkness.

Amen!!....I’ve been divorced for over 31 years....I’d rather die alone, than marry a non believer....not that I’m alone, as God is in my heart.

I have never ever dated a man since I became Born Again....I was in my 30s when God came to me....as soon as I came to the Lord, he gave me the faith to believe, that if a husband is out there, another Born Again, he will bring him to me ,as in our paths will cross.

 

[Rheeder]

Welcome to the forum.
Your boy friends reason for not believing is logic, he does not believe in things he cannot see or touch.
May I suggest that you introduce him to reasonable faith Web site.
It is run by a Professor of Philosophy and his q+a page is full of logical questions and answers that demonstrate the reasonableness of faith in God.
There are also videos of his debates with atheists.
Or show him this site and the long list of arguments for God, all based on science, for him to read and refute.

Physicist Michael Strauss discusses Christianity and science at Stanford University

This is one of my favorite lectures. The lecture: Dr. Strauss delivered this lecture at Stanford University in 1999. It is fairly easy to understand, and it even includes useful dating tips. Here i…

winteryknight.com

Lastly take him to church with you.
It is no5 enough to argue and pray, he needs to be exposed to Christians,vto experiences live worship and fellowship with believers.

God is capable of saving him because of your prayers, but the more his brain and thoughts are engaged by the reasons for God, with the truth of the Bible, the real experience of worship at church and the friendship with other Christian men the harder it is for the devil to confuse him and snatch away what will save him.

Thank you so much for your advice, I really appreciate it I do believe God will save him but I think that it will take some time.

 

[Rheeder]

Hello Rheeder,
I was married to a non-believer myself too. It didn't survive and she never came to Christ. Trust me, any relationship between and non-believer and a Christian will not survive because there will be a point of contention that will be unreconcilable. God warns of this.

2 Corinthians 6:14 - Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness; And what communion has light with darkness.

Hello, thank you for your response and I respect what you have said. The thing that's bothering me is, he is not an atheist out of choice, he has never been exposed and introduced to the Lord. His parents are atheists so he was raised that way. Like I said, he is open to it and I truly believe that when I take him to church and he experiences it, he will change. I have made peace with the fact that if he doesn't, I will have to leave, but for now I am the only person in his life that can help him be saved.

 

[Rita]

Yes, I was just voicing my opinion, that was all, I could not imagine living with a non believer...it would destroy me, God also blessed me with 3 wonderful sons.....I also thank him for the abuse I suffered throughout my life, ..he’s made me the person he wants me to be now...and I’m most definitely in his hands.

I will delete the sad emoji as it upsets you so much...I just saw the difficulty that you must have gone through, living with an unbeliever, that was all.

I think it’s a shame that you took the sad emoji personally.

I didn’t take offence or take it personally, I was merely explaining that a lot of good came out of my marriage. I was just sharing xx
I wasn’t upset in the slightest-

 

[Rockerduck]

Hello, thank you for your response and I respect what you have said. The thing that's bothering me is, he is not an atheist out of choice, he has never been exposed and introduced to the Lord. His parents are atheists so he was raised that way. Like I said, he is open to it and I truly believe that when I take him to church and he experiences it, he will change. I have made peace with the fact that if he doesn't, I will have to leave, but for now I am the only person in his life that can help him be saved.

Give your boyfriend a book by CS Lewis called "Mere Christianity". CS Lewis was an Atheist who came to Christ. Your boyfriend could learn from his experience

 

[Papa Smurf]

I've recently found my home in Jesus Christ and I am forever grateful.

Hello again Rheeder (I just replied to you on a different thread), you certainly come to us with the most wonderful news

Thank you for sharing it with us, and WELCOME TO THE FAMILY OF GOD

I often pray for things in my life that are not meant for me to be taken away or for my eyes to be opened.

That is a big part of what "sanctification"/becoming more and more Christlike is about. Perhaps more than anything else, it means becoming less and less sinful (the Holy Spirit convicts us when we sin and we immediately seek to be forgiven, cleansed and restored to full fellowship with Him .. 1 John 1:9, and of course, to repent/turn away from continuing in it .. though this can be hard to do at times).

It's also true that God does take certain sins away from us when we become believers, those that He knows we cannot handle, but He certainly does not take it all away. Like everything else in our Christian walk, continual growth in the knowledge and understanding of God and of His word (the Bible) is the principal part of/the key to our sanctification .. e.g. John 17:17.

My boyfriend is an atheist, it didn't bother me at first as I was not religious at the time. I have spoken to him about it and raised my concerns that there might come a time where I can no longer be with him. He is understanding about it. I also have discussions about Christianity with him on a regular basis, he likes to talk and listen about my experiences and the changes it has made to my life. He is willing to be open to it. I am afraid he will only try for the sake of our relationship and create a false belief, I don't want him to believe just for me but for the unconditional love of Jesus Christ and everything good that it entails. I want our relationship to grow in the love of Jesus Christ and celebrate it together. I pray for him and I am going to teach him how to pray. His reason for being an atheist is logic. He does not believe in things that he can't see or touch. It is not his fault. I want to see him being saved, not for me but for him.

You are very wise to be concerned about the reason behind your boyfriend's conversion (if he gets to that point, that is). You are also correct about needing to separate from him (especially if you are still in a physical relationship with him .. e.g. 2 Corinthians 6:14-16; 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, both for your good as a Christian, as well for his, because it's hard to believe that a Christian's words are true if they are not living them out in their own life). The Christian life is the most wonderful and joyous life that anyone in this world can have, but it is rarely easy!

God bless you!! (Numbers 6:24-26)

--Papa Smurf
p.s. - here's a Christian quote (from pastor and theologian, Dr. Sinclair Ferguson) that I try to live by, ~especially~ when I don't know what to do next/which choice to make in a particular situation that I am confronted with, trusting that God does (cf Proverbs 3:5-6).

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