Man Rules Over His Wife?
- Thread starter Bob Estey
- Start date
-
Welcome to Christian Forums, a Christian Forum that recognizes that all Christians are a work in progress.
You will need to register to be able to join in fellowship with Christians all over the world.
We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless!
Ruler (rules), is one of those funky words that have duel meanings and caveats.
Sure, in the aspect of a marriage, either, man or woman can take on the role of Ruler in the aspect of complete Dominance, dictatorial, demanding, of the other, and all household members, without consideration of anything else, other than, “I” said so.
Scripturally, the caveat begins and ends with,
A Ruler being appointed to have governance over his household, (husband over wife and children)… with the Caveat….THAT;
The husband, man, govern his household, According to Gods dominance, commands, chief, leader, instructions, guidance.
* God is BOTH a Ruler and a Servant.
So also is the Man appointed to BE BOTH, a Ruler and a Servant over his Household.
No doubt, some men (as well as some women who are, by choice or circumstances, head of household, void of a mans presence)…
Take on the role of ONE or the OTHER;
(And some to the extreme)…
Only ruler, not a Servant;
(Dictator)
Only servant, not a Ruler;
(Yielding, maid)
Result is an “IMBALANCE”.
* Men of the world would call that a medical term of a “Mental Illness caused by a Mental ‘imbalance’, or broadly a Mental “disorder”….and the (implied) solution is a combination of Drugs and Psychotherapy.
* Men in the world would lean more toward calling that a “Spiritual illness”, caused by the conflict between the minds thoughts and hearts thoughts….and the solution being Gods role as Servant, guiding one through the conflict to reach that delicate BALANCE.
Glory to God,
Taken
Lambano
Well-Known Member
That's an interesting take on that passage. While some parts of Evangelicalism take this as God's endorsement of Patriarchy, the context is part of The Curse.
My oldest stepson and his first wife were both strong Type A personalities, and just about EVERYTHING became a battle for control. The actual issues were less important than who got their own way. When they finally announced their decision to divorce after 20 years of constant battles, my first response was, "What took you so long?"
At least I got a couple of grandchildren out of it.
ScottA
Well-Known Member
Oh, right. Not really either, but simply part of the "image" of God portrayed in the creation of mankind, which shows Christ as Head from the beginning.
Arthur81
Well-Known Member
To say God's word was merely making a prediction, you must ignore the parallel phrase in Gn. 4:7, and also you must claim higher understanding by inspiration than the Apostle Paul on this statement in Gn. 3:16. I'll go with Paul rather than Bob Estey.
CadyandZoe
Well-Known Member
The latter. In 1 Timothy, Paul argues that Eve attempted to "take command" and rule over her husband. In Genesis, God is telling Adam that Eve will be tempted to do the same thing again, so he must rule over his wife.
According to the Bible, God created Eve to be Adam's helper, meaning she was not intended to be his servant or slave. The term "ezer" in Hebrew refers to a helper who provides necessary support. Just like God is an ezer for Israel, Eve was supposed to support Adam's life project and help him fulfill his God-given responsibilities. Adam's life project was to name all the animals, and Eve was there to assist him. However, Adam sinned by placing himself in a subservient position under his wife and eating from the tree as she suggested. As a result, God told Adam that Eve would desire him, but he must rule over her.
Ronald Nolette
Well-Known Member
Where does it say that in Genesis? Are your referring to the scripture I quoted in my original post? I don't think that is a command. I believe that is a prediction.
I've never married, but we are taught to love our neighbors as ourselves, and I am quite certain I wouldn't want a wife ordering me around. I doubt wives want to be ordered around, either.
Okay, don't call it a prediction - call it a prophesy. God prophesized that because of Eve's sin, Adam would rule over her. (Genesis 3:16)
I can't find a verse where God commands Adam to rule over his wife. I just see the verse I quoted in the original post, where God is telling Eve that, as the result of her sin, Adam will rule over her. I think that was a prediction (or prophesy), not a command.
It should not be about “ordering”, rather being as asset, helper and pleasing one to the other.
No doubt there are many tasks and chores to managing a household….an agreement of helping and at times having to realistically compromise can all smoothly work out satisfactorily.
I am in a music collaboration with a lady. We've made two CDs (of Christian songs we've written) and have performed several concerts. We work together. Neither of us tells the other what to do - we are respectful of each other. I suspect marriage partners need to learn to respect each other.
CadyandZoe
Well-Known Member
Well, I'm not sure if I agree or disagree. I mean, you make some good points but it all depends on what God meant by "rule over" Eve. In my mind the word "over" seems to indicate an asymmetrical, high-handed, overbearing relationship. And if that is what God meant to say, then I would agree with you. God never commanded Adam to treat Eve in that way. And so perhaps God was predicting Adam's counter-response to Eve's behavior.
That being the case, it would seem that God was predicting that Eve would "desire" her husband in such a way that would tempt Adam to become an overbearing husband. I'm not sure how that works exactly but I have seen it happen.
In fact, the New Testament picture of marriage is also asymmetrical, but in a good way and I'm convinced that their teaching is based on God's will for marriage as recorded in Genesis. I believe one can extrapolate God's will for marriage from the following verse.
Genesis 2:17-19
Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name.
The Hebrew word for "helper" is the term "ezer" (pronounced "ate zair") And since the Bible speaks about God as Israel's "ezer" then we can safely conclude that Adam's "ezer", his helper" was not lower in dignity. The relationship was not asymmetrical in terms of their dignity, importance or worth. Eve was due just as much dignity, love, and honor as her husband. But the relationship was asymmetrical in other ways. After all, God made Eve to be a helper suitable for Adam, and by strong implication, suitable to help Adam with his life project -- naming all the animals. She would need to have all the good qualities of a helper: patience, intelligence, respectfulness, creativity, wisdom, and things such as these. But her role in the marriage would be one of helper, not leader.
But as we saw in later chapters of Genesis, Eve was tempted to take the lead and she convinced her husband to eat of the forbidden fruit. And Adam agreed with her. And yet, the NT authors put the blame on Adam rather than Eve as the one who brought sin into the world.
Thoughts?
I would assume that just as Eve was meant to be Adam's helper, so Adam was meant to be Eve's helper.
It seems to me that if God created Eve to be Adam's helper, and if he also didn't intend for Adam to be Eve's helper, then God was creating Eve to be Adam's slave. I don't think that's what happened.
CadyandZoe
Well-Known Member
The term "ezer" signifies an asymmetrical relationship. Although a husband may assist his wife in various ways, the "ezer" is not merely a verb implying assistance; rather, it refers to a person who is designated to provide help.
CadyandZoe
Well-Known Member
Remember I said that God described himself as Israel's "ezer", which strongly suggests that Eve was NOT Adam's slave since God didn't mean to suggest that he was Israel's slave. Also, since God described himself as Israel's "ezer" we understand that although the roles are asymmetrical in focus, they are not asymmetrical in dignity. In fact, God is more worthy of dignity than Israel, even though, for a time, he acted in the role of the "ezer."
For instance, take a football team where the quarterback serves as the leader of the offense, and the remaining players act as his "ezer." However, in some situations, the quarterback may need to block or tackle an opposing player. In such exigent circumstances, the quarterback becomes the "ezer" of the team, temporarily taking on another player's role.
The role of a wife is to be a helper to her husband, just as God intended. Although she may sometimes have to take on other roles, her core responsibility is to support and assist her husband. According to God's design, the husband is the head of the household and the wife is his helper, fulfilling their respective roles. The larger issue here is one of responsibility. Why does God command children to obey their parents? Because God has entrusted parents with the responsibility of caring for their children, and they will be held accountable if they neglect or abandon that responsibility. Why does a wife obey her husband, because the husband will be held accountable for the actions of the family.
Then what it seems to amount to is slavery - Eve was Adam's slave. I don't think that was the Lord's intention.
Similar threads
