The Body Rejects The Transplant- AKA: Shunned By Believers

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Jan 16, 2024
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I’ll get straight to the point. My greatest difficulty in continuing my walk with God is other believers. Or rather, I should say, a lack of support or encouragement from them. I completely understand that my past plays a huge role in my situation and I do not disregard that fact. However, to be completely shunned by several churches and then basically lost in the mix at the church I found that has yet to judge me based on my history, has hurt so deeply that I just don’t know what to do. I’ll not give up my faith, but am tired of feeling as if I will never belong until I’m called home.
To be blatantly honest, I was arrested for charges involving visiting websites that were illegal (children). I am not justifying what I did, but several factors played into that occurring and although I could go into detail I won’t as the demons of my past will get no glory in this situation. At the end of the day I was the one who made the wrong choices. However, while in jail, I had a Damascus Road experience which I will put in the testimony section sometime, and completely surrendered to God. I am no longer the man I was. By the grace of God I have been released with all charges dropped. I had hoped that there would be exponential growth with my freedom, but it has been slow going. Churches refusing to discuss my attendance. People refusing to talk to me. I gained Christ in the walls of the jail, but lost everything I owned, all of my friends, and all but one family member. I hoped the body of believers would be welcoming, but I feel like the organ that the body rejects after transplant. I feel like the leper who is “unclean” although I’ve been cleansed. I feel like my truth, my testimony, my existence cannot be accepted by humanity. I understand that Paul faced a tough journey in overcoming his past, but at least he had someone who stood with him and believed in him (Barnabas).
I am just feeling discouraged. I’ll not lie about what I did, but wish believers truly understood that sins weigh the same. Our lies, our selfishness, our inability to forgive, our cruelty, and our self righteousness are the same as the horrendous viewing habits of my past. All are covered by the blood of Jesus. I forgive my abusers, my haters, my rejectors- because I am no better. Only by the grace of God am I forgiven and by His grace, “I am what I am.”
 

Jay Ross

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People who are part of a church believe that they have to protect themselves from those who are around them or come into their church.

Let me give you an example. A beautiful widow joins a church and the other married women within that community become fearful of her because their husbands might develop a wandering eye for her. So, they pray that God will give her a husband so that they can feel safe with her still in the church. The truth of the matter is that they are operating out of their self and not out of God's love and as such the poor widow is cursed with a new husband that is rushed by the other women in the church.

The same is true for other "repentant" sinners joining a church. Because we are so different from the average Church goer, they become protective of their "imperfect relationship" with the Lord and shuns us.

Fortunately, this is God's battle to fight on our behalf and we need to hand the situation over to God to correct the "Church." All that we can do is to keep pressing into God's loving embrace for us and to love the people within the church that are shunning us and not judge them.

We have to allow God to deal with our rejection within the Church and be patient because of the hard nuts that God has to crack to get into the heart of the matter with them to change them to be more like Him.

Ask God for patience as He draws people around you to nourish you and to feed you within His church as you send your roots down into the fertile field which is His true Church.

Shalom
 
Jan 16, 2024
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People who are part of a church believe that they have to protect themselves from those who are around them or come into their church.

Let me give you an example. A beautiful widow joins a church and the other married women within that community become fearful of her because their husbands might develop a wandering eye for her. So, they pray that God will give her a husband so that they can feel safe with her still in the church. The truth of the matter is that they are operating out of their self and not out of God's love and as such the poor widow is cursed with a new husband that is rushed by the other women in the church.

The same is true for other "repentant" sinners joining a church. Because we are so different from the average Church goer, they become protective of their "imperfect relationship" with the Lord and shuns us.

Fortunately, this is God's battle to fight on our behalf and we need to hand the situation over to God to correct the "Church." All that we can do is to keep pressing into God's loving embrace for us and to love the people within the church that are shunning us and not judge them.

We have to allow God to deal with our rejection within the Church and be patient because of the hard nuts that God has to crack to get into the heart of the matter with them to change them to be more like Him.

Ask God for patience as He draws people around you to nourish you and to feed you within His church as you send your roots down into the fertile field which is His true Church.

Shalom
I understand it, but it is still a source of sadness as I am finally following Him and am constantly feeling rejected, dejected, and subjected to judgement from others. Not fun for someone who faces codependency and abandonment issues. At least I have God.
 
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Cassandra

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but wish believers truly understood that sins weigh the same. Our lies, our selfishness, our inability to forgive, our cruelty, and our self righteousness are the same as the horrendous viewing habits of my past. All are covered by the blood of Jesus. I forgive my abusers, my haters, my rejectors- because I am no better.
This is true of all of us, and we will be judged on it.
God bless you for saying so. It is a daily struggle for everyone.
 

quietthinker

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I’ll get straight to the point. My greatest difficulty in continuing my walk with God is other believers. Or rather, I should say, a lack of support or encouragement from them. I completely understand that my past plays a huge role in my situation and I do not disregard that fact. However, to be completely shunned by several churches and then basically lost in the mix at the church I found that has yet to judge me based on my history, has hurt so deeply that I just don’t know what to do. I’ll not give up my faith, but am tired of feeling as if I will never belong until I’m called home.
To be blatantly honest, I was arrested for charges involving visiting websites that were illegal (children). I am not justifying what I did, but several factors played into that occurring and although I could go into detail I won’t as the demons of my past will get no glory in this situation. At the end of the day I was the one who made the wrong choices. However, while in jail, I had a Damascus Road experience which I will put in the testimony section sometime, and completely surrendered to God. I am no longer the man I was. By the grace of God I have been released with all charges dropped. I had hoped that there would be exponential growth with my freedom, but it has been slow going. Churches refusing to discuss my attendance. People refusing to talk to me. I gained Christ in the walls of the jail, but lost everything I owned, all of my friends, and all but one family member. I hoped the body of believers would be welcoming, but I feel like the organ that the body rejects after transplant. I feel like the leper who is “unclean” although I’ve been cleansed. I feel like my truth, my testimony, my existence cannot be accepted by humanity. I understand that Paul faced a tough journey in overcoming his past, but at least he had someone who stood with him and believed in him (Barnabas).
I am just feeling discouraged. I’ll not lie about what I did, but wish believers truly understood that sins weigh the same. Our lies, our selfishness, our inability to forgive, our cruelty, and our self righteousness are the same as the horrendous viewing habits of my past. All are covered by the blood of Jesus. I forgive my abusers, my haters, my rejectors- because I am no better. Only by the grace of God am I forgiven and by His grace, “I am what I am.”
There is no solution in self focus. All it does is flatter the ego under the guise of 'how right I'm and how wrong others are'
Being isolated is not new or unexpected so getting our head out of our own proverbial backside is a good objective.
Jesus was abandoned and betrayed even by his mates yet it didn't consume him. He knew his Father was right beside him and would never abandon him.....contrary to what is believed by many.
 

Big Boy Johnson

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I’ll get straight to the point. My greatest difficulty in continuing my walk with God is other believers.

Then you don't have much of a walk with the Lord to begin with...

If you really loved the Lord, it would not matter what others do or don't do because your first love should be the Lord and the top priority in your life should be your personal relationship with Him above all others!

God was willing to forgive David for intentional murder! So if you walk with the Lord after repenting like David did, He will accept you, and cleanse you.

And... you're not obligated to tell everyone all about your past as doing so causes people to reject you. I learned that years ago after tell people I used to be a drug addict, a drunk and a womanizer... to this day I still have hair half way down my back and I've had lots of people reject me over that, mostly older people.

But, I also learned that when the chips are down... God's Word, praying in the Holy Ghost, praise and worship, and maintaining an attitude of thankfulness are all worth more than all the money and "friends" in the world! thumbsup2.gif

So, IF you are really serious about the Lord... He won't give up on you, unless you give up on Him.
 

dev553344

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I’ll get straight to the point. My greatest difficulty in continuing my walk with God is other believers. Or rather, I should say, a lack of support or encouragement from them. I completely understand that my past plays a huge role in my situation and I do not disregard that fact. However, to be completely shunned by several churches and then basically lost in the mix at the church I found that has yet to judge me based on my history, has hurt so deeply that I just don’t know what to do. I’ll not give up my faith, but am tired of feeling as if I will never belong until I’m called home.
To be blatantly honest, I was arrested for charges involving visiting websites that were illegal (children). I am not justifying what I did, but several factors played into that occurring and although I could go into detail I won’t as the demons of my past will get no glory in this situation. At the end of the day I was the one who made the wrong choices. However, while in jail, I had a Damascus Road experience which I will put in the testimony section sometime, and completely surrendered to God. I am no longer the man I was. By the grace of God I have been released with all charges dropped. I had hoped that there would be exponential growth with my freedom, but it has been slow going. Churches refusing to discuss my attendance. People refusing to talk to me. I gained Christ in the walls of the jail, but lost everything I owned, all of my friends, and all but one family member. I hoped the body of believers would be welcoming, but I feel like the organ that the body rejects after transplant. I feel like the leper who is “unclean” although I’ve been cleansed. I feel like my truth, my testimony, my existence cannot be accepted by humanity. I understand that Paul faced a tough journey in overcoming his past, but at least he had someone who stood with him and believed in him (Barnabas).
I am just feeling discouraged. I’ll not lie about what I did, but wish believers truly understood that sins weigh the same. Our lies, our selfishness, our inability to forgive, our cruelty, and our self righteousness are the same as the horrendous viewing habits of my past. All are covered by the blood of Jesus. I forgive my abusers, my haters, my rejectors- because I am no better. Only by the grace of God am I forgiven and by His grace, “I am what I am.”
People can have an affect on us and that is true. It is important to pray and read scriptures daily and attend church regularly. Our identity should not be governed by the affect people around us have. It should be from the Holy Spirit. If people seem judgmental then perhaps you have found the wrong flock or perhaps some other reason makes them appear judgmental. Hmmm. Well I can't help you there.

And we here like to make sure our individual doctrines are represented in the threads we post in. And that may appear judgmental. And I think it is important to separate what is judgmental of good and evil and what is judgmental of a person.

Some people like to judge sinners. I consider myself a sinner and in hopes that God will save me in the end. Some people like to tell everyone they're saved too. Hmmm. I usually try to ignore them all and walk my own walk with God.
 

dev553344

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You need to REPENT and quit being a sinner.

If you don't, you won't be saved in the end.
This is you're judgment? Can you prove it's God's too? I can only assume you're are speaking on God's behalf.
 

dev553344

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Luke 18:9-14​

The Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector​

9 Also He spoke this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others: 10 “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, ‘God, I thank You that I am not like other men—extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I possess.’ 13 And the tax collector, standing afar off, would not so much as raise his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me a sinner!’ 14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”

@Big Boy Johnson read again the above. The judgment you are passing onto me is not biblical.
 

Big Boy Johnson

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All things are possible thru Christ (Philippians 4:13), so THRU JESUS we actually DO have the ability to stop sinning


1 John 3:6
Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not

1 John 2:4
He that saith, I know him, and keepeth not his commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him.

1 John 1:6
if we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth:

1 John 2:1
I write these things unto you, that ye sin not

Galatians 5:16
Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh

James 4:17
Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.

1 John 3:8
He that committeth sin is of the devil

John 8:34
Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin.

1 Corinthians 15:34
Awake to righteousness, and sin not; for some have not the knowledge of God: I speak this to your shame.

We should not be willingly or knowingly doing sinful things... it should be a very rare occasion for a Christian to sin and IF they did it would NOT be a situation where it's something they knew it was sinful and they decided to do it anyway.

1 John 1:8 is obviously speaking of if we claim we have never sinned... or if we make a mistake such as dropping something on the floor accidentally which is an imperfection that is not unto death (does not cause us to be separated from God like sin does)

The very next verse tells us if we confess out sins the Lord cleanses us of ALL unrighteousness... so is 1 John1:8 claiming 1 John1:9 is un-true???
 

ShineTheLight

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Then you don't have much of a walk with the Lord to begin with...

If you really loved the Lord, it would not matter what others do or don't do because your first love should be the Lord and the top priority in your life should be your personal relationship with Him above all others!

God was willing to forgive David for intentional murder! So if you walk with the Lord after repenting like David did, He will accept you, and cleanse you.

And... you're not obligated to tell everyone all about your past as doing so causes people to reject you. I learned that years ago after tell people I used to be a drug addict, a drunk and a womanizer... to this day I still have hair half way down my back and I've had lots of people reject me over that, mostly older people.

But, I also learned that when the chips are down... God's Word, praying in the Holy Ghost, praise and worship, and maintaining an attitude of thankfulness are all worth more than all the money and "friends" in the world! View attachment 40375

So, IF you are really serious about the Lord... He won't give up on you, unless you give up on Him.
All things are possible thru Christ (Philippians 4:13), so THRU JESUS we actually DO have the ability to stop sinning


1 John 3:6
Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not

1 John 2:4
He that saith, I know him, and keepeth not his commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him.

1 John 1:6
if we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth:

1 John 2:1
I write these things unto you, that ye sin not

Galatians 5:16
Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh

James 4:17
Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.

1 John 3:8
He that committeth sin is of the devil

John 8:34
Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin.

1 Corinthians 15:34
Awake to righteousness, and sin not; for some have not the knowledge of God: I speak this to your shame.

We should not be willingly or knowingly doing sinful things... it should be a very rare occasion for a Christian to sin and IF they did it would NOT be a situation where it's something they knew it was sinful and they decided to do it anyway.

1 John 1:8 is obviously speaking of if we claim we have never sinned... or if we make a mistake such as dropping something on the floor accidentally which is an imperfection that is not unto death (does not cause us to be separated from God like sin does)

The very next verse tells us if we confess out sins the Lord cleanses us of ALL unrighteousness... so is 1 John1:8 claiming 1 John1:9 is un-true???

May I add something?

Hebrews 13:3
Remember them that are in bonds, as bound with them; and them which suffer adversity, as being yourselves also in the body.
 
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Then you don't have much of a walk with the Lord to begin with...

If you really loved the Lord, it would not matter what others do or don't do because your first love should be the Lord and the top priority in your life should be your personal relationship with Him above all others!

God was willing to forgive David for intentional murder! So if you walk with the Lord after repenting like David did, He will accept you, and cleanse you.

And... you're not obligated to tell everyone all about your past as doing so causes people to reject you. I learned that years ago after tell people I used to be a drug addict, a drunk and a womanizer... to this day I still have hair half way down my back and I've had lots of people reject me over that, mostly older people.

But, I also learned that when the chips are down... God's Word, praying in the Holy Ghost, praise and worship, and maintaining an attitude of thankfulness are all worth more than all the money and "friends" in the world! View attachment 40375

So, IF you are really serious about the Lord... He won't give up on you, unless you give up on Him.
Thank you for your input and proving the point I had regarding judgemental believers. I never once said that I was backing out, I simply stated that the walk was made more difficult due to lack of support. Your initial claim that I don’t have much of a walk to begin with is exactly the kind of response I am eluding to.
- The body is to edify, instruct, and love.
- All have sinned, all fall short.
- Even Paul struggled in being supported as a believer.
- My walk is not based on other’s beliefs about me, but my belief in Him.
- I do not tell everyone my entire journey, but several in leadership positions have chosen to turn their back due to prior knowledge of my charges.
- You reiterate my exact experience with “IF”, but I still love you and appreciate your candor.
 
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Big Boy Johnson

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May I add something?

Hebrews 13:3
Remember them that are in bonds, as bound with them; and them which suffer adversity, as being yourselves also in the body.

Yes, and if they refuse to walk with the Lord... we can all pray till we're blue in the face and it's not going to help.

Sometimes there is need for teaching those that oppose themselves, the need instruction!

2 Timothy 2:25
In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth;



I never once said that I was backing out, I simply stated that the walk was made more difficult due to lack of support. Your initial claim that I don’t have much of a walk to begin with is exactly the kind of response I am eluding to.

IF... you were going to fall away from the Lord just because some who claim to be His people act badly towards you... then that would point to not having much a walk with the Lord to begin with.

My point was that no matter what others do or don't do... our relationship with the Lord is first and foremost and we should definitely NOT be looking at man's actions regardless of if they are good or bad.

Besides, if one has done some terrible sin like this and they tell people about it... then they are helping to create their own rejection.

And if it was in the news and everyone around town knows without you telling them... then this is one of the down sides of doing sin that you'll just have to live with. Part of repentance is being humble and being sorry for what we have done.,.. not grumbling and complaining.

When someone has done a terrible sin, they have to prove themselves to be trustworthy and sincerely repentant and over time display good works unto repentance before people can trust you again. This is not out of the ordinary and if you were in their shoes you'd be leery of trusting someone too if you knew they had done some terrible sin.
 

Cassandra

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I understand it, but it is still a source of sadness as I am finally following Him and am constantly feeling rejected, dejected, and subjected to judgement from others. Not fun for someone who faces codependency and abandonment issues. At least I have God.
you are more than welcome to share any sadness or disappointment with us.
You will find that some on this board possess the spiritual gift of mercy (Hello dev!)God had a reason for bestowing that gift. Those people were placed in the church to help the other Christians. Don't be discouraged.
You can always bring your concerns here. We also have a prayer area, so you can put requests there.as well.
God bless you!
 

dev553344

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you are more than welcome to share any sadness or disappointment with us.
You will find that some on this board possess the spiritual gift of mercy (Hello dev!)God had a reason for bestowing that gift. Those people were placed in the church to help the other Christians. Don't be discouraged.
You can always bring your concerns here. We also have a prayer area, so you can put requests there.as well.
God bless you!
Thank you Cassandra. Prayer requests sounds like a great idea!
 

VictoryinJesus

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but I feel like the organ that the body rejects after transplant.
Wow …when I read the title of your thread …I didn’t mean to, but I think I stopped reading after the body rejects the transplant. I didn’t catch you related it to “shunned by believers”. After reading your post to me you have every right to speak up concerning the body rejects a transplant. You have every right to be grieved in the Spirit. To me it’s an opportunity for “believers” to ask why they reject the transplant? An opportunity for their doing some soul searching…instead of your coming away with questioning if you are unacceptable after being restored and “regenerated” by God …to me the bigger question is why does the body refuse the transplant? It’s like when Jesus Christ asked Saul “Saul Saul why do you persecute Me?” One of the best questions Jesus Christ ever asked someone (Imo). Your OP reminded me immediately of branches cut off but how God can graft them back in and how to not “be so high minded” that if God cut them off, He can also cut you off.

i hope you continue on with the mindset of being a new organ transplanted into the body of Christ. But I hope you look at it from the Joyful perspective of being a newly transplanted necessary part of the body… received of God. and not by the perspective of being a necessary part (joy) then rejected. instead what God has translated into the body? No man can dismember? It is admirable too that you shared what you were arrested for. That to me is what it means to walk in the Light. To me it’s not walking in perfection but instead bringing that which is imperfect into the perfect Light of Christ for the destruction of the imperfect by the Light. Men hate the light and don’t want to come to it so that their deeds be made known. Paul never justified or supported all the evil things he had done. He used it to shout “you know what kind of man I was. You have seen all that I did.” “Now I preach the Faith I once destroyed.”
 
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Big Boy Johnson

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And one needs to understand that lots of folks will want to stay away from those that look at kiddie porn as they are concerned about the safety of children which is a very valid concern.

In many cases, those that have child sexual attractions don't get over them easily so if one is going to walk with the Lord after having done this sort of thing... they will have to demonstrate that they are faithful to the Lord and should not be mumbling and complaining as they are the ones that did the disgusting deed.

For those working with people that have done sin:

Galatians 6:1
Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.


For those that have done the sin:

1 Peter 5:6
Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:

Philippians 2:14
Do all things without grumbling or complaining