What do you do when God doesn't answer prayer?

[Dan57]

When my mother was dying of cancer she prayed and no healing came. I remember her telling God: "I know you hear me." That's where I think we as believers have an even greater struggle than unbelievers: We know God hears us, yet withholds answers.

I spoke with a lawyer one time who handled a well-known case of priests molesting youth. I knew he was struggling when he said: "There is no God!

If God favorably answered the prayer of every Christian who was sick or dying, no one would ever die. Its better to pray for the strength to endure sickness, hardships, or death, than to expect God to deliver us from it. "For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us" (Romans 8:18)

The lawyer made the mistake of confusing man with God.. The works of a priest should never be confused or compared with the perfect example of Christ; e.g, I saw another Christian screw-up, so I no longer believe in God? That don't cut it, we don't put our faith in other men.

 

[Soverign Grace]

Joel Osteen and a lot of others are nothing but cons. And they will pay in the lake of fire.

Don't give up. I have multiple disc ruptures in my back that have caused me pain for many years. And a couple of other issues.

But with God's support and the simple realization going into a self pity party only make it worse, I am probably happier than most.

My wife also has a back problem, but you won't get to the self-pity from her. She supports me and I support her.

We have a nicer than most home and a yard full very happy birds that it is fun to watch and feed.

Thanks for the encouragement. I deal with a lot of physical pain every day and it gets hard to bear - and it was from someone else's mistake. Then I see other prayers go unanswered and it doesn't make sense.

I too think Osteen is a fraud but he doesn't seem to be judged. He certainly has a nicer life than most it seems.

 

[marksman]

I know that this struggle is as old as the hills but I'd still like to get feedback from other believers. I've seen some prayers miraculously answered; I knew it was from God. Yet other answers - very deep and heartfelt longings and prayer for good things for family members and answers have not come to pass. I go before God many many many times throughout my day and pray for things that I believe are in keeping with His will, yet my prayers result in nothing.

I know that other believers have this happen and I wonder how you deal with it? I've had people say that there must be some sin in one's life, (Job's friends) or that God's timing is not ready yet, but the petitioning to God continues to bear nothing and yet I know God hears me.

When my mother was dying of cancer she prayed and no healing came. I remember her telling God: "I know you hear me." That's where I think we as believers have an even greater struggle than unbelievers: We know God hears us, yet withholds answers.

I spoke with a lawyer one time who handled a well-known case of priests molesting youth. I knew he was struggling when he said: "There is no God! That's why you're suffering!" I knew instinctively that the horrid things he heard had caused him to lose his faith. There have been many times when I felt like turning my back on God, and at times I have. But then I learn there is nowhere else to go. ("Whom have I in heaven but you?")

So how do you reconcile the suffering in this world - and your own - of good people and the seeming non-suffering of heathens? I've read Psalm 73 a number of times but it still doesn't cut it. I still petition God and ask Him to answer.

The trouble a lot of the time is that we want God to be our personal Santa Claus. If we are a good boy or a good girl he will reward us with presents.

I shocked the church one day when they had been asked to pray for a young man who was brain dead from a punch to the head and hitting it on the concrete path.

I was in the back row and I quickly grasped what was going to happen, so I got up and walked to the front and said for all to hear, "I don't pray" and paused for effect and to see the look on their faces (shock horror) and then continued, "until I know what God wants me to pray."

I said that God had shown me that we were to go to the hospital where he was being cared for, pray over a cloth and put it under his pillow."

The leader of the fellowship said he agreed with what I said and two others and myself went to the hospital and did just that. We told the staff what we were doing and not to remove the cloth.

The hospital had told the parents that he would never recover and he would be a vegetable for the rest of his life such was the brain damage.

A couple of weeks later he walked out of the hospital a normal person.

We all want people to benefit from the prayers we offer but the only thing that matters is what is God's will.

In another case, a lady's mother got cancer but she had this conviction that her mother should not die of it so she gave herself to prayer. She heard right and her mother was cured of the cancer. When her mother did die it was peacefully in her sleep.

The only answer to prayer that is worth having is the one that God wants.

 

[Soverign Grace]

Walk in faith and remember, what is a long life on this earth compared to eternity.

We are here to prepare for eternity and help others in their efforts.

That is one reason I so strongly oppose Calvinism.

They have no allowance self preparation for helping others. To them is all done and sealed issue before one is even born.

I know that we sometimes lose sight of that but it still gets hard. Then it hurts when you see your family struggling - I think there is no greater hurt.

I never studied Calvinism - I've heard of it. Do they practice it in a specific denomination?

 

[Soverign Grace]

I am learning to be very careful for what I pray for, lol. Prayers for myself are pretty much to accomplish His will in my life and that I would see others through His eyes. But lately, it is often about recognizing the doors He opens and closes, and to act (or not) on it. I begged God to spare my mother but, it was her time. It did not make me angry at God as, like you said @amadeus , we have our appointed times to die and I knew that. I think, in hindsight sometimes we are GRATEFUL for unanswered prayer if He allows us to see why He did not grant it!
His Will Be Done!

You have expressed a struggle I have a lot: when are we to act and when are we to leave a matter to God. In spite of seeking answers carefully it's still hard to discern.

My mother died a horrible cancer death - so that I didn't understand. I know we're appointed once to die, but I have trouble with one dying before their supposed time.

 

[Soverign Grace]

If God favorably answered the prayer of every Christian who was sick or dying, no one would ever die. Its better to pray for the strength to endure sickness, hardships, or death, than to expect God to deliver us from it. "For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us" (Romans 8:18)

The lawyer made the mistake of confusing man with God.. The works of a priest should never be confused or compared with the perfect example of Christ; e.g, I saw another Christian screw-up, so I no longer believe in God? That don't cut it, we don't put our faith in other men.

I'm sure the things the lawyer was forced to listen to were indeed horrific and quite sickening. I had a feeling that he was Catholic which is why it may have troubled him even more. Irregardless of whether it was man who committed the sin one has to question why God allowed a child to be harmed like that.

 

[Soverign Grace]

The trouble a lot of the time is that we want God to be our personal Santa Claus. If we are a good boy or a good girl he will reward us with presents.

I shocked the church one day when they had been asked to pray for a young man who was brain dead from a punch to the head and hitting it on the concrete path.

I was in the back row and I quickly grasped what was going to happen, so I got up and walked to the front and said for all to hear, "I don't pray" and paused for effect and to see the look on their faces (shock horror) and then continued, "until I know what God wants me to pray."

I said that God had shown me that we were to go to the hospital where he was being cared for, pray over a cloth and put it under his pillow."

The leader of the fellowship said he agreed with what I said and two others and myself went to the hospital and did just that. We told the staff what we were doing and not to remove the cloth.

The hospital had told the parents that he would never recover and he would be a vegetable for the rest of his life such was the brain damage.

A couple of weeks later he walked out of the hospital a normal person.

We all want people to benefit from the prayers we offer but the only thing that matters is what is God's will.

In another case, a lady's mother got cancer but she had this conviction that her mother should not die of it so she gave herself to prayer. She heard right and her mother was cured of the cancer. When her mother did die it was peacefully in her sleep.

The only answer to prayer that is worth having is the one that God wants.

That's an uplifting story. I wish all prayers were answered that way. Unfortunately there seem to be some prayers that we labor over and yet don't see the results.

 

[Mike Dwight]

This discussion could be deep as Protestant Reformation sorry! Warning! But, what the Heck did Jesus ever pray for besides the Bread, and Thanks, and, hey Dad sure you need to kill me today?

Of course, none of them work that way. Of course not. People sure like to know you're praying about it. I guess there's Ask, Seek, Knock.

 

[amadeus]

So you're saying to basically walk by faith?

Yes, of course, but in walking by faith stay always in touch with God and read the scriptures daily. He will talk to your heart and give you the answers you need when you need them. Never presume that your wants are the same as your needs. Ultimately as we approach God more closely our wants should be moving closer to what God says we need. For a faithful believer God will supply every need, but remember that is according to what He knows that you need as opposed to what you believe that you need.

"And when he putteth forth his own sheep, he goeth before them, and the sheep follow him: for they know his voice.
And a stranger will they not follow, but will flee from him: for they know not the voice of strangers." John 10:4-5

We are, or should be, His sheep! If we are not that is something we need to talk to Him about...

 

[amadeus]

I am learning to be very careful for what I pray for, lol. Prayers for myself are pretty much to accomplish His will in my life and that I would see others through His eyes. But lately, it is often about recognizing the doors He opens and closes, and to act (or not) on it. I begged God to spare my mother but, it was her time. It did not make me angry at God as, like you said @amadeus , we have our appointed times to die and I knew that. I think, in hindsight sometimes we are GRATEFUL for unanswered prayer if He allows us to see why He did not grant it!
His Will Be Done!

Sometimes it a very difficult thing when dealing with very sick, very dear and very elderly people. Now for these last few years, since my pastor's wife died [in 2012] I have taken or been given by God responsibility for much of his doings... especially secular. He is very frail and will be 94 years of age this coming July. Sometimes I pray that he will simply pass on from this life, but I recognize all too well that sometimes that has at least a selfish vein in it... because the responsibility for him weighs heavily on me. My wife understands when I have to take time for him, but she must be my primary responsibility and at times there is not enough time and I get weary. How much weariness can we handle?

"And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not." Gal 6:9

Pray for me in this!

 

[pompadour]

Soverign Grace. I'm 77, many times I have been where you seem to be. No mater what we must go through there are hundreds of people that have a much bigger hill to clime then we do.
One thing I remind my self of from time to time was from Roger Kipling ( I complained because I had no shoes until I met a man that had no feet )

Prayer: yes, no, wait. Most of mine seem to be no, and wait. But we don't know what GOD is doing and why. There is so much going on in the unseen realm that it make s my brain ache.
People mention Job. Who was God testing? Job, the Devil, falling angels, Demons? one of them, all of them? we don't know what God is up to.

One time I was up for a job opening. A group chose me to fill it. some one didn't want me so they had a different group choose and they chose some one else. there were 5 people in the group. 3 against me 2 for me.
I didn't get the job. 5 yrs latter, the 3 that were against me had died. The 2 that were for me 25 yrs latter are alive and well. Was God involved in that? was God testing me ? Was God testing them ? Or do thing just happen.
Who is there to trust in but God... Though He slay me yet will I trust Him...

 

[Soverign Grace]

Yes, of course, but in walking by faith stay always in touch with God and read the scriptures daily. He will talk to your heart and give you the answers you need when you need them. Never presume that your wants are the same as your needs. Ultimately as we approach God more closely our wants should be moving closer to what God says we need. For a faithful believer God will supply every need, but remember that is according to what He knows that you need as opposed to what you believe that you need.

"And when he putteth forth his own sheep, he goeth before them, and the sheep follow him: for they know his voice.
And a stranger will they not follow, but will flee from him: for they know not the voice of strangers." John 10:4-5

We are, or should be, His sheep! If we are not that is something we need to talk to Him about...

My husband keeps saying to become the person God wants me to be. So I guess that's the same as walking by faith not by sight. It just gets difficult at times when you labor and labor and see the wicked prosper. I know of at least three people who are awful human beings who seemingly prosper after harming a lot of people. I've prayed for God's Hand of judgment but none is ever forthcoming. I tell Him that He's supposed to be a just God and yet I don't see much justice anywhere I look.

 

[Soverign Grace]

Sometimes it a very difficult thing when dealing with very sick, very dear and very elderly people. Now for these last few years, since my pastor's wife died [in 2012] I have taken or been given by God responsibility for much of his doings... especially secular. He is very frail and will be 94 years of age this coming July. Sometimes I pray that he will simply pass on from this life, but I recognize all too well that sometimes that has at least a selfish vein in it... because the responsibility for him weighs heavily on me. My wife understands when I have to take time for him, but she must be my primary responsibility and at times there is not enough time and I get weary. How much weariness can we handle?

"And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not." Gal 6:9

Pray for me in this!

You have a good heart to care for him.

 

[Soverign Grace]

Soverign Grace. I'm 77, many times I have been where you seem to be. No mater what we must go through there are hundreds of people that have a much bigger hill to clime then we do.
One thing I remind my self of from time to time was from Roger Kipling ( I complained because I had no shoes until I met a man that had no feet )

Prayer: yes, no, wait. Most of mine seem to be no, and wait. But we don't know what GOD is doing and why. There is so much going on in the unseen realm that it make s my brain ache.
People mention Job. Who was God testing? Job, the Devil, falling angels, Demons? one of them, all of them? we don't know what God is up to.

One time I was up for a job opening. A group chose me to fill it. some one didn't want me so they had a different group choose and they chose some one else. there were 5 people in the group. 3 against me 2 for me.
I didn't get the job. 5 yrs latter, the 3 that were against me had died. The 2 that were for me 25 yrs latter are alive and well. Was God involved in that? was God testing me ? Was God testing them ? Or do thing just happen.
Who is there to trust in but God... Though He slay me yet will I trust Him...

I like to hear from others who are honest about their times of testing and confusion. I appreciate you sharing your story about being turned away for a job. I think I walk close to God but I always question Him and times I get angry and tell Him so. When I read a particularly horrifying story I tell God that He's sick for allowing things to go on. But I get up the next day and seek Him. But I get very weary of it. I've been waiting a long time for some answers. I deal with a lot of physical/ emotional pain and sometimes feel I'm teetering on the edge of a precipice. I think I've gotten attacked more than most. A friend is a Christian and has seemingly lived a blessed life. She was raised Christian, never had anything serious happen, and sails through life. My life is the exact opposite. I've had severe trials that could bring an ox to its knees and every day live with physical pain. Nothing seems to make any sense. My friend was harsh one time and told me I was too negative, but when you've had harsh things happen it's hard to stay cheerful and rosy and paste on a smile. She can afford to be that way - she's had a pretty easy life. My husband insisted that she isn't telling me the truth but from what I see she has had it easy.

You're right that there is no other alternative. That's the circular way I always go and wind back up to God.

 

[Dave L]

My husband keeps saying to become the person God wants me to be. So I guess that's the same as walking by faith not by sight. It just gets difficult at times when you labor and labor and see the wicked prosper. I know of at least three people who are awful human beings who seemingly prosper after harming a lot of people. I've prayed for God's Hand of judgment but none is ever forthcoming. I tell Him that He's supposed to be a just God and yet I don't see much justice anywhere I look.

Here's a pamphlet (Calvinistic) explaining what you are seeing and why, better than any I've read. The Curse-Reward of the Wicked Well-Doer

 

[pompadour]

I like to hear from others who are honest about their times of testing and confusion. I appreciate you sharing your story about being turned away for a job. I think I walk close to God but I always question Him and times I get angry and tell Him so. When I read a particularly horrifying story I tell God that He's sick for allowing things to go on. But I get up the next day and seek Him. But I get very weary of it. I've been waiting a long time for some answers. I deal with a lot of physical/ emotional pain and sometimes feel I'm teetering on the edge of a precipice. I think I've gotten attacked more than most. A friend is a Christian and has seemingly lived a blessed life. She was raised Christian, never had anything serious happen, and sails through life. My life is the exact opposite. I've had severe trials that could bring an ox to its knees and every day live with physical pain. Nothing seems to make any sense. My friend was harsh one time and told me I was too negative, but when you've had harsh things happen it's hard to stay cheerful and rosy and paste on a smile. She can afford to be that way - she's had a pretty easy life. My husband insisted that she isn't telling me the truth but from what I see she has had it easy.

You're right that there is no other alternative. That's the circular way I always go and wind back up to God.

You must be very strong ( stronger then you think ) God only gives the toughest jobs to the strongest people.
God must have a lot of faith in you. NEVER GIVE UP. Trust in God and He will strengthen you. God always honers faith because faith honers God.
God Bless.

 

[amadeus]

My husband keeps saying to become the person God wants me to be. So I guess that's the same as walking by faith not by sight. It just gets difficult at times when you labor and labor and see the wicked prosper. I know of at least three people who are awful human beings who seemingly prosper after harming a lot of people. I've prayed for God's Hand of judgment but none is ever forthcoming. I tell Him that He's supposed to be a just God and yet I don't see much justice anywhere I look.

This world on planet Earth was all created by God, but man has formed or reformed it according to his own purposes rather than as God led him.

God has given us the reins to our own lives, but He wants us to give those reins back to Him and to keep on giving them back. When we do we learn also to be content with where we are in Him, but that does not mean that the world around us, the world of men, will improve for everyone else. The evil will continue while men continue to live evilly. The vision we need to have is of God and the things of God. Don't expect evil men to ever do things like God would like to see them. He gave each of us the dominion [the reins] for us only. We can and should help others if they will allow it to the extent that we are able. We cannot make their decisions for them. God does not force feed anyone and we should not try to do that either.

 

[1stCenturyLady]

I know that this struggle is as old as the hills but I'd still like to get feedback from other believers. I've seen some prayers miraculously answered; I knew it was from God. Yet other answers - very deep and heartfelt longings and prayer for good things for family members and answers have not come to pass. I go before God many many many times throughout my day and pray for things that I believe are in keeping with His will, yet my prayers result in nothing.

I know that other believers have this happen and I wonder how you deal with it? I've had people say that there must be some sin in one's life, (Job's friends) or that God's timing is not ready yet, but the petitioning to God continues to bear nothing and yet I know God hears me.

When my mother was dying of cancer she prayed and no healing came. I remember her telling God: "I know you hear me." That's where I think we as believers have an even greater struggle than unbelievers: We know God hears us, yet withholds answers.

I spoke with a lawyer one time who handled a well-known case of priests molesting youth. I knew he was struggling when he said: "There is no God! That's why you're suffering!" I knew instinctively that the horrid things he heard had caused him to lose his faith. There have been many times when I felt like turning my back on God, and at times I have. But then I learn there is nowhere else to go. ("Whom have I in heaven but you?")

So how do you reconcile the suffering in this world - and your own - of good people and the seeming non-suffering of heathens? I've read Psalm 73 a number of times but it still doesn't cut it. I still petition God and ask Him to answer.

Are you Spirit-filled? IOW do you have any of the gifts of the Spirit for supernatural hearing a prophecy, word of wisdom or word of knowledge, or interpretation of tongues? That is what I use to FIRST listen expectantly for God to speak WHAT I am to pray for. He does, I repeat it, and it comes to pass 100% of the time since 1977.

 

[Earburner]

God is not there to make our lives easy.
We pray because we want to talk with our heavenly Father, not because we want things.

When life is tough and our prayer for life to be comfortable aren't answered, we have a choise.
To trust God and continue or to reject God.

When life kicks one in the teeth and stamps on ones hand it is hard to choose to trust God.

No where are we promised an easy, comfortable life, if anything the promise is that we will have a cross to carry to our exceution site.

What are you trusting in? A comfortable life or in a place with Jesus!

Exactly!
Jesus said in John 16[33] These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.

And this: Mat. 6[31] Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?
[32] (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.
[33] But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
[34] Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.
> right there, is "having faith as a little child".

Mark 10[15] Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein.

 

[Earburner]

^ correction: smiley face is accidental.