Does God repent for you or do you use his gift to allow you to repent?
Yes.
12 Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; 13 for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure. Philippians 2:12-13
Christians have been arguing these points since the Reformation so I doubt we can resolve them on a forum for amateur theologians over the course of a few posts.
The real argument is over "will" and whether or not we possess "free will." It's a mistake to equate freedom of choice to free will, but many do.
My beliefs are built on scripture rather than worldly thinking, and scripture is clear about our fallen state, our inability to seek God out, much less choose to believe Him, unless He draws us to Himself, unless He teaches us.
This doctrine gives God the glory as our only Savior in opposition to our own works for salvation and the state of mind called self righteousness.
Jesus called the Pharisees hypocrites. This was because they made much of their works to be righteous before God, but Jesus made it clear that God doesn't weigh the good deeds of people "under law" against their evil deeds.
There are no heavenly scales of justice for the Jews or the Christians, but heaven has clearly weighed the heathen in such a fashion. When we read of heaven's decrees we tend to assume that these come from God, but God appointed rulers, powers, principalities, and an entire heavenly host to rule over men until the reign of Jesus Christ, a truly righteous reign.
The reign of heaven is by law and the heathen of this world have always had law based upon their fallen nature. Even the simplest tribal peoples have forms of law, but not always righteous law.
Jesus said that whoever sins is a slave to sin. He said this to Pharisees and men who took pride in their own righteousness, but these same men wanted to murder Him, the Lord of glory.
If we have a fallen nature, and we all do until God gives us a new nature in a new birth, then all of our choices serve ourselves. But, we were not created to serve ourselves. We were created to serve God.
15 Then the Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to tend and keep it. Genesis 2:15
This was man's original "job" or purpose, to serve God by tending and keeping God's garden. The first sin wasn't just breaking God's commandment, but Adam's choice to serve himself, regardless of his reasons. Since then all men serve themselves, follow their own will, and sin in disobedience to God's will.
For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10
Jesus didn't die on the cross to redeem us to ourselves, but to God, to buy us back from that sinful self serving nature to serve Him.
He does this in direct opposition to our own will.
Our will wants to serve ourselves, to be pleased in ourselves, to satisfy our vanity, our pride. But, God says our correct relationship to Him is one of humility, submission to His will.
In Christ, that submission is to extend to all created in His image.
It is impossible to have a right relationship with other people without having a right relationship with God, simply because our self serving will always responds poorly to what we see as evil behavior directed at us or at what we love. It's natural for us to love those who love us. We're built that way as social creatures. But, it isn't natural to love our enemies, to do good to those who attack us, or slight us, or do evil against what we love.
God gives those who believe His Son the power to receive His Spirit and be called sons of God. His Spirit gives us power to do His will in submission to Him, to serve Him by serving others, regardless of their own self will. The saints have real power to choose between our own will and God's will, because we've been freed from the bondage of sin, the fear of death and condemnation.
The unregenerate have no such power. Their will is subject to their fallen nature. This isn't my idea, but the teaching of scripture, the teaching of Christ.
Those who try to bind the conscience by using the law and the prophets can have no effect upon the saints, only the unregenerate. They mishandle scripture, not recognizing the authority of Christ or the redemption paid in His blood. The Spirit of God is not deceived, nor is He bound by law.
Blessed is the man to whom the Lord shall not impute sin. Romans 4:8
(For until the law sin was in the world, but sin is not imputed when there is no law. Romans 5:13
The self righteous hate these verses because they don't apply to self righteousness.
12 Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body, that you should obey it in its lusts. 13 And do not present your members as instruments of unrighteousness to sin, but present yourselves to God as being alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God. 14 For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace. Romans 6:12-14
These instructions are only for the saints, because the self righteous have no power to cease from sin. Only the saints are able to make free will choice to serve themselves or serve God, and God has told us the consequence of serving ourselves:
There is a way that seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death. Proverbs 14:12, Proverbs 16:25
This was important enough for God to say it twice.
Obedience to God is a choice, but one that only the saints can make. Consequently repentance follows faith and is a work of His grace in us. It doesn't seem that way to us because it's our choice, but it isn't a choice that we can make without God's grace.
