Welcome Rodney Anderson.
I am not a Calvinist, but have studied it somewhat. Of course, any Calvinists are welcome to correct this. Total Depravity doesn't really say that we don't know good from evil, but that we are not interested in pursuing good. That everything that we do is tainted by sin. Every thought, every action. Even otherwise outwardly good acts are not good because the motivation of our heart is not to bring glory to God. Neither does it mean that we are as evil as possible. I agree with this much.
The Calvinists take this so far as to say that we cannot respond (or even perceive it IIRC?) to the conviction of sin to receive Christ on our own due to the extent of our depravity. We're that dead and depraved. I believe that we can, and must, respond to the drawing of the Holy Spirit in order to believe Jesus was crucified in our place, died, and rose from the dead. God convicts us of this and even gives us the faith to believe, but we can resist and refuse this or accept it. To the Calvinist, this free will choice is not available and God must do the choosing for us. He 'elects' us. Or not!
Of course this then places the fault of people not choosing God on God as He supposedly chooses them from before their birth for Hell. They are predestined and have no choice in the matter. But then this gets into other points of Calvinism.
I agree with CoreIssue that God not only can, but did, create us with free will. This seems to ruffle the feathers of the Calvinist because it is seen as an affront to God's Sovereignty. I do not have the same trouble reconciling the two. Man's Free Will versus God's Sovereignty.
I look at it this way. There is a father who is omniscient and omnipotent. He chooses from his own free will to bestow the marvelous gift of free will to his child. Even those who are not his children are given this gift due to the Father's generous and gracious nature. We all were not his child at some point. Tells the child that they can drive his car to the shopping mall. Then go see a movie and then drop off their friend, but must come straight home. And not go anywhere other than those places. Not to exceed the speed limit. Etc. (The Law)
Now since this powerful father can constantly monitor the child (even their thoughts and intent) and can recall the child and vehicle home at any instant, he has truly never surrendered his sovereignty. If the child strays from the instructions then the Father continues to have the sovereign choice of whether or not to recall the vehicle and child home or let them continue on making their own free will choices. With consequences.
This is not to say that He does not guide and lead them using GPS/text messages, er... the Holy Spirit's unction and leadings. If they are wandering off course, He gently lovingly attempts to steer them back on course. Since Free Will is His sovereign choice for them then anything beyond this would actually violate that. Except when He chooses to override the situation in order to bring about his sovereign choice in the matter. He never forfeits such veto power or sovereignty.
Given today's technology, this is almost possible to an ordinary earthly father. Its always been possible with the Sovereign King of the Universe over His creation. In other words, its God's Sovereign choice to give the freedom (free will) to his children and to watch what they do with it. (Not that He doesn't already know what choices will be made!) Able to intervene at any instant. In complete control. Never surrendering His sovereignty for one instant. Thus Man's (the child) Free Will and God's (the Father) Sovereignty can operate simultaneously without conflict.
“I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live:” (Deuteronomy 30:19)
In no way did the child participate in the arrangement of the event depicted above except that when the Father offered the car to go to the mall, the child said "yes". No 'works', no earning the privilege. It was a gift. And without giving the child the ignition key (faith) this would not be possible.
In short, I believe that the Elect are all those who do believe and receive God's gracious and merciful offering. The Calvinists tend to tell me that it is an even more gracious and wonderful act that God does the choosing for us. I see that point.
However, this is viewing it from man's perspective IMO. How might God feel if he gave no choice to the child, but the vehicle drove itself to the mall, the movies and then to the friend's and then home. All on a schedule like a train or a plane. How might he feel if he gives the child free will and the child goes nuts and races around, has accidents and disobeys his instructions? Ah... but how might he feel if the child could do all that, but does not because he loves his father, wants to please him and show thankfulness for the free will extended to him.
"Free Will... its God's sovereign plan."