New and need help

[ruggedcross]

I am thankful I found this board. I am in desperate need of help. I am having some serious concerns with my wife and the path that she is on. We are both Christians and have been for many years. Recently a person came into her life that is special needs. That female has became a large part of my wife's life which I have no issue with. My wife feels that God has called her to become a mother figure to this young woman. My concern is ever since that young lady became a part of my wife's life thing have rapidly changed with both our relationship and also her beliefs. I don't want to paint my wife in a bad light, that's part of the reason I am glad to find a forum where no one will "know" her. I love my wife and am really concerned not only for her but for our marriage. There is no other way to put this but be blunt so here goes. My wife now believes that she can talk to people whom have passed away through her cell phone via text messages. This would include her bother, mother other distant relatives and even other people whom she says "come through". It only get's worse. She now also believes she can talk to God directly via text through her cell phone and is saying some very unbiblical things. When I have tried to address these thing that contradict the Bible she says the bible was written by men and translations have gotten lost. That's the kind of stuff I heard from non-Christians. This whole thing has morphed into something really big and I believe dangerous. Now she believes she has several adult special needs kids whom are really her children that she lost from miscarriage's years ago. She communicated with these adults through text. She has been promised money and all sorts of things that never happen. She chalks it up to "evil" trying to keep her from them. Thank you all for reading and any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am at a loss.

 

[Jay Ross]

Hello @ruggedcross,

I can hear your pain and concern for your wife.

All that I can suggest to you is that you ask God to protect her and to keep drawing her into His Loving Embrace and in a righteous relationship with Him. Then when you continue praying for her, thank God that He has heard your prayer that He will keep her safe and continue to draw her into His Loving embrace and a righteous relationship with Him by giving Him the praise and glory that He has heard your prayer for her and that He is working on fulfilling your prayer for your wife. Every Day thank the lord that He has heard your prayer and in His time, He will meet your request as your wife responds to being drawn to Him in righteousness.

Hand your concerns over to God and Let God resolve what the outcome will become, without you taking your eyes off of God and your righteous relationship with Him.

Honour God with your lips and your deeds, so that you become a light within your community within your circumstances so that God's Glory can be seen in and through you.

May the Lord bring healing into both of your lives.

Shalom

PS: - The above is my prayer for her and the same prayer is for you as well, that God will protect you and continues to draw you to Himself.

 

[Cassandra]

I am thankful I found this board. I am in desperate need of help. I am having some serious concerns with my wife and the path that she is on. We are both Christians and have been for many years. Recently a person came into her life that is special needs. That female has became a large part of my wife's life which I have no issue with. My wife feels that God has called her to become a mother figure to this young woman. My concern is ever since that young lady became a part of my wife's life thing have rapidly changed with both our relationship and also her beliefs. I don't want to paint my wife in a bad light, that's part of the reason I am glad to find a forum where no one will "know" her. I love my wife and am really concerned not only for her but for our marriage. There is no other way to put this but be blunt so here goes. My wife now believes that she can talk to people whom have passed away through her cell phone via text messages. This would include her bother, mother other distant relatives and even other people whom she says "come through". It only get's worse. She now also believes she can talk to God directly via text through her cell phone and is saying some very unbiblical things. When I have tried to address these thing that contradict the Bible she says the bible was written by men and translations have gotten lost. That's the kind of stuff I heard from non-Christians. This whole thing has morphed into something really big and I believe dangerous. Now she believes she has several adult special needs kids whom are really her children that she lost from miscarriage's years ago. She communicated with these adults through text. She has been promised money and all sorts of things that never happen. She chalks it up to "evil" trying to keep her from them. Thank you all for reading and any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am at a loss.

Perhaps what you could do is tell her that what she has found is interesting, and maybe you and she should share it with the pastor! Make an appt, and both of you go see him. He may be better able to handle this. but you have to get her there. Don't come off all six guns. Tell her it is interesting or amazing (don't know what word--just not critical) Let the pastor work on it. This way she won't think you are not on her side as a companion. You need to explain to the pastor what the plan is ahead of time. That way , he will know how to act and what to say before she shows up. He will be able to present a more calm spirit than maybe he would if he heard it from her first.

 

[amadeus]

@ruggedcross No more advice here. Just keep trusting always in God and stay in touch with Him. I have you and your wife in prayer.

 

[Rita]

I know this is going to sound weird but something just struck me in what you are sharing. Grief can impact people in so many ways. You mentioned miscarriages, and a list of people your wife feels she can contact, obviously people she had a connection to………..so that need to connect is all part of grief and loss. The situation with the person with special needs, relays to me that your wife is trying to fill a gap.
I don’t know how old your wife is or how long ago she experienced the losses, but maybe this is all part of it………..a desire to connect and feel needed.
Grief can create many problems and can be triggered by so many things. Also , sometimes we push it away when the loss happens, so it remains undealt with, I know because I have never really dealt with the grief I experienced when my oldest tried to end his life and later when my youngest did the same, about six months after I suddenly loss’s my mum. I only lost my mum, my sons survived but my world as a mum was changed in so many ways. The pain is deep within me still ……..

Could any of the above be a factor to consider and pray about, or seek advice over xx

 

[Mayflower]

I agree with things said above, and will keep both you and your wife in prayer.

 

[Heart2Soul]

I am thankful I found this board. I am in desperate need of help. I am having some serious concerns with my wife and the path that she is on. We are both Christians and have been for many years. Recently a person came into her life that is special needs. That female has became a large part of my wife's life which I have no issue with. My wife feels that God has called her to become a mother figure to this young woman. My concern is ever since that young lady became a part of my wife's life thing have rapidly changed with both our relationship and also her beliefs. I don't want to paint my wife in a bad light, that's part of the reason I am glad to find a forum where no one will "know" her. I love my wife and am really concerned not only for her but for our marriage. There is no other way to put this but be blunt so here goes. My wife now believes that she can talk to people whom have passed away through her cell phone via text messages. This would include her bother, mother other distant relatives and even other people whom she says "come through". It only get's worse. She now also believes she can talk to God directly via text through her cell phone and is saying some very unbiblical things. When I have tried to address these thing that contradict the Bible she says the bible was written by men and translations have gotten lost. That's the kind of stuff I heard from non-Christians. This whole thing has morphed into something really big and I believe dangerous. Now she believes she has several adult special needs kids whom are really her children that she lost from miscarriage's years ago. She communicated with these adults through text. She has been promised money and all sorts of things that never happen. She chalks it up to "evil" trying to keep her from them. Thank you all for reading and any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am at a loss.

I can see why you are concerned...I don't believe the special needs person has directly influenced her...maybe indirectly by causing her to relive memories of loved ones who has passed.
Are you well versed in scripture?
Meaning when she says she can speak to her lived ones who are dead then that is when you need to speak the Truth of His Word to refute that...
HERE ARE A FEW
The Bible says...
Deuteronomy 18:10-13 ESV

There shall not be found among you anyone who burns his son or his daughter as an offering, anyone who practices divination or tells fortunes or interprets omens, or a sorcerer or a charmer or a medium or a necromancer or one who inquires of the dead, for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord. And because of these abominations the Lord your God is driving them out before you. You shall be blameless before the Lord your God,

Isaiah 8:19-20 ESV

19 And when they say to you, “Inquire of the mediums and the necromancers who chirp and mutter,” should not a people inquire of their God? Should they inquire of the dead on behalf of the living? 20 To the teaching and to the testimony! If they will not speak according to this word, it is because they have no dawn.

Leviticus 20:27 ESV

27 “A man or a woman who is a medium or a necromancer shall surely be put to death. They shall be stoned with stones; their blood shall be upon them.”

 

[Heart2Soul]

The Word destroys the lies and deception of the enemy....and you/she will know the truth and the truth will set you/her free.

 

[Heart2Soul]

I am thankful I found this board. I am in desperate need of help. I am having some serious concerns with my wife and the path that she is on. We are both Christians and have been for many years. Recently a person came into her life that is special needs. That female has became a large part of my wife's life which I have no issue with. My wife feels that God has called her to become a mother figure to this young woman. My concern is ever since that young lady became a part of my wife's life thing have rapidly changed with both our relationship and also her beliefs. I don't want to paint my wife in a bad light, that's part of the reason I am glad to find a forum where no one will "know" her. I love my wife and am really concerned not only for her but for our marriage. There is no other way to put this but be blunt so here goes. My wife now believes that she can talk to people whom have passed away through her cell phone via text messages. This would include her bother, mother other distant relatives and even other people whom she says "come through". It only get's worse. She now also believes she can talk to God directly via text through her cell phone and is saying some very unbiblical things. When I have tried to address these thing that contradict the Bible she says the bible was written by men and translations have gotten lost. That's the kind of stuff I heard from non-Christians. This whole thing has morphed into something really big and I believe dangerous. Now she believes she has several adult special needs kids whom are really her children that she lost from miscarriage's years ago. She communicated with these adults through text. She has been promised money and all sorts of things that never happen. She chalks it up to "evil" trying to keep her from them. Thank you all for reading and any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am at a loss.

Praying as well.

 

[Curtis]

I am thankful I found this board. I am in desperate need of help. I am having some serious concerns with my wife and the path that she is on. We are both Christians and have been for many years. Recently a person came into her life that is special needs. That female has became a large part of my wife's life which I have no issue with. My wife feels that God has called her to become a mother figure to this young woman. My concern is ever since that young lady became a part of my wife's life thing have rapidly changed with both our relationship and also her beliefs. I don't want to paint my wife in a bad light, that's part of the reason I am glad to find a forum where no one will "know" her. I love my wife and am really concerned not only for her but for our marriage. There is no other way to put this but be blunt so here goes. My wife now believes that she can talk to people whom have passed away through her cell phone via text messages. This would include her bother, mother other distant relatives and even other people whom she says "come through". It only get's worse. She now also believes she can talk to God directly via text through her cell phone and is saying some very unbiblical things. When I have tried to address these thing that contradict the Bible she says the bible was written by men and translations have gotten lost. That's the kind of stuff I heard from non-Christians. This whole thing has morphed into something really big and I believe dangerous. Now she believes she has several adult special needs kids whom are really her children that she lost from miscarriage's years ago. She communicated with these adults through text. She has been promised money and all sorts of things that never happen. She chalks it up to "evil" trying to keep her from them. Thank you all for reading and any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am at a loss.

I’ll stand with you in agreement in prayer for God to open her eyes to the truth.
In this situation He’s the only way to get through to her.

Shalom Aleichem

 

[Windmillcharge]

My wife now believes that she can talk to people whom have passed away through her cell phone via text messages.

Your wife needs medical help, somehow you need to get her to talk to her doctor about this.

 

[Aunty Jane]

Sadly this sounds like declining mental illness and needs professional help. If she is delusional, then nothing will convince her that what she is doing is not real. Delusions are their reality, so tread carefully and try to get a mental health assessment. I agree with Cassandra that encouraging her to share her amazing abilities with a health professional might be a better approach.
This is bigger than a Pastor is trained to handle.

 

[ruggedcross]

I know this is going to sound weird but something just struck me in what you are sharing. Grief can impact people in so many ways. You mentioned miscarriages, and a list of people your wife feels she can contact, obviously people she had a connection to………..so that need to connect is all part of grief and loss. The situation with the person with special needs, relays to me that your wife is trying to fill a gap.
I don’t know how old your wife is or how long ago she experienced the losses, but maybe this is all part of it………..a desire to connect and feel needed.
Grief can create many problems and can be triggered by so many things. Also , sometimes we push it away when the loss happens, so it remains undealt with, I know because I have never really dealt with the grief I experienced when my oldest tried to end his life and later when my youngest did the same, about six months after I suddenly loss’s my mum. I only lost my mum, my sons survived but my world as a mum was changed in so many ways. The pain is deep within me still ……..

Could any of the above be a factor to consider and pray about, or seek advice over xx

I have thought about this as well. She has several miscarriages when she was younger. That has been at least 25 years or more. Maybe she never really dealt with that from her past. She never mentioned it mush and it never has been an issue or discussion in our marriage. As for some of the other people she feels she is communicating with I can almost understand. She lost her brother 3 years ago to suicide. Their relationship was very strained so I am sure some type of guilt after his death is possible. Her mother recently also passed away and that was very hard on her. So again I can see how this type of behavior could be attributed to grief. The concern is this all started before the passing of her mother. She feels she speaks to people whom have been listed as missing and other things. My main concern is she has shifted her beliefs from a spiritual stand point. She now believes the bible is not all right, and that God does not know everything. That scares me really bad. Thank you all for your comments and suggestions. I have spoken to our pastor and he agrees this is something that while he can address from a theological standpoint, he is not equipped to deal with from a mental health stand point.

 

[Rita]

It could be a mixture of things, but our minds are so complex and mental illness is something that people observing notice more than the person themselves. Can you talk to a family doctor about your concerns. I am so sorry as it must be really difficult to know what to do.
Rita

 

[Eternally Grateful]

I am praying as well.

Don't judge her. Love her. sometimes that is hard to do I know..

 

[Angelina]

Wonderful sharpness and sensitivity to the Holy Spirit's leading in this thread. Praying into this situation as well. What is hidden in the darkness will be revealed in the light [Luke 8:17] xox

 

[farouk]

The Word destroys the lies and deception of the enemy....and you/she will know the truth and the truth will set you/her free.

@Heart2Soul Reminds me of Hebrews 4.12:

"For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart."

 

[Heart2Soul]

@Heart2Soul Reminds me of Hebrews 4.12:

"For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart."

Amen...
And this song just really stirs me up!

 

[quietthinker]

I am thankful I found this board. I am in desperate need of help. I am having some serious concerns with my wife and the path that she is on. We are both Christians and have been for many years. Recently a person came into her life that is special needs. That female has became a large part of my wife's life which I have no issue with. My wife feels that God has called her to become a mother figure to this young woman. My concern is ever since that young lady became a part of my wife's life thing have rapidly changed with both our relationship and also her beliefs. I don't want to paint my wife in a bad light, that's part of the reason I am glad to find a forum where no one will "know" her. I love my wife and am really concerned not only for her but for our marriage. There is no other way to put this but be blunt so here goes. My wife now believes that she can talk to people whom have passed away through her cell phone via text messages. This would include her bother, mother other distant relatives and even other people whom she says "come through". It only get's worse. She now also believes she can talk to God directly via text through her cell phone and is saying some very unbiblical things. When I have tried to address these thing that contradict the Bible she says the bible was written by men and translations have gotten lost. That's the kind of stuff I heard from non-Christians. This whole thing has morphed into something really big and I believe dangerous. Now she believes she has several adult special needs kids whom are really her children that she lost from miscarriage's years ago. She communicated with these adults through text. She has been promised money and all sorts of things that never happen. She chalks it up to "evil" trying to keep her from them. Thank you all for reading and any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am at a loss.

The idea that one can communicate with those who have died is the natural extension of the belief that ones goes to either heaven or hell when one dies. All it requires is a bit of tweaking afforded by circumstance and bingo, the belief that one is talking with the dead has people liaising with demons......and given time, the upshot results in instability.

 

[Heart2Soul]

@Heart2Soul Reminds me of Hebrews 4.12:

"For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart."

I am a bit stirred up tonight....I can't help it...I feel it...it's here! His prophesy to pour out His Spirit is here!