Why unfair

[Moonstone Eterni]

Last night was a horrible night. What happened?

It all started as I prayed to God as usual, telling him his standards for conduct are too radical. God wants me to be perfect, otherwise he won’t get rid of the demons who are attached to my body and wrecking my life.

For years now I have begged God to do something about the demons and ensure they never return. The pleading has happened repeatedly, over and over and over, but to no avail: God does not want to remove the demons unless I am perfect.

What does perfection entail? It means if I do something completely harmless like have a glass of wine, then I am found “guilty” of committing an “atrocious” sin; and God says I must suffer with horrible demons as a consequence. In other words, I am not allowed to make any so-called mistakes, and often these “mistakes” are victimless things that offend nobody except God. The fault-finding over harmless little things never seems to end.

Apparently God thinks drinking wine is a monstrous crime. His logic doesn’t make any sense: He says that a very small percentage of drinkers kill people in car accidents, so therefore no one is allowed to drink. This way of thinking is extremely unfair to all responsible alcohol consumers who just want to experience a simple pleasure, never having killed anyone.

The way God reasons about alcohol isn’t any different than people with left-wing views who want to ditch the Second Amendment and ban all guns. They think that because a small number of psychopaths kill people with guns (such as school shooters or inner city people who commit gang-related violence) that nobody should be allowed to own firearms. That is very unfair to all the good Second Amendment supporters who never kill anyone.

Banning guns won’t stop criminals. It is very easy to get illegal drugs, illegal firearms, and anything illegal on the dark web or the black market in general. In the event that the government implements “gun control,” responsible people will follow the laws, but criminals won’t. Gun control essentially disarms good people and enables psychopaths who want to hurt people.

Prohibition is also ineffective. The government banned alcohol a hundred years ago, but it didn’t stop people from drinking. It basically enabled gangsters like Al Capone to make a fortune by producing alcohol illegally and selling it to speakeasies. A massive criminal underworld thrived because of Prohibition.

I have prayed to God many times, explaining his extremely unfair logic and way of treating me. But God doesn’t care: He never stops treating me unfairly.

So what happened last night? I prayed to God, and the demons didn’t like that I was praying, so they went to parallel dimensions and committed murder against my parallel self. Those parallel selves are all unsaved, and demons can get away with murder against people who aren’t saved. I’ve been told that I’m an atheist on 70% of the multiverse.

The demons don’t operate on a rational level. It doesn’t make any sense to commit murder against atheists (none of whom pray) because they don’t like that a Christian is praying.

God didn’t bother to stop any of this from happening. I was imperfect yesterday, so I have to suffer with demons—and they commit murder and destroy lives, and God refuses to do anything about it. But heaven forbid if I have a sip of wine and harm nobody! God judges me for harmless things and tells me I’m an atrocious sinner (and apparently I deserve to suffer with murderous demons), but God won’t do anything about demons committing murder.

I am sick and tired of God treating me so unfairly. The Bible says that Jesus redeems the sins of people who believe in him, so why the hell is God telling me I have to be perfect and walk on eggshells for the rest of my life or else suffer with horrible demons? That is extremely unfair and not consistent with Christian theology.

I asked God if the whole idea of “Jesus as redeemer” is misinformation, because God is clearly disregarding a core tenet of the Christian faith. As usual, he didn’t bother to answer my question.

Here is what I’m going to do today: I will not drink any alcohol, not even one sip. If God refuses to get rid of the demons tonight and instead chooses to be a complete jerk and find fault in me for something else, then I will not go to church tomorrow. I refuse to hear a preacher preach about God’s love when all I’m experiencing from God is extreme unfairness and a complete disregard for my feelings. Nobody is perfect!

Does God even try to understand what makes me drink? If he did, he would know that I drink because he makes me feel so hopeless by telling me I have to suffer with demons over miniscule imperfections.

Hey God, here is hint: Quit being a jerk by constantly judging me for harmless little things, then I’ll stop drinking alcohol because I won’t have a reason to drown out the misery that your radical standards cause!

I know exactly what is going to happen tonight: God will probably refuse to do anything about the demons even though I didn’t drink today. He will find a fault in me for something else like using nicotine.

Um, excuse me. It is extremely hard to quit multiple addictions at once. If God actually showed some compassion for once, he would remove the demons tonight even though I used nicotine. But no: I bet he wants me to forgo all addictions at the same time, which is too hard to do. What happens next? I will feel deeply hurt and insulted that God punished me for trying so hard not to drink, instead choosing to find fault in me for something else, so I’ll go right back to drinking! I can’t stand God treating me so unfairly!

Here is my prayer request: I want God to tell me why the hell is he treating me so unfairly. God’s conduct towards me is not normal! It doesn’t make sense to tell me to be absolutely perfect or else suffer, since a core theological tenet of Christianity is that Jesus redeems the sins of believers, which means we don’t have to be perfect. Given all the suffering I have gone through because of God’s radical perfectionism, I believe it’s high time he gave me an answer.

 

[ScottA]

I will give you an answer.

You have the wrong idea. Life in the world is not the redeeming, but is rather for redeeming--all of it, not just that part before coming to Christ, but also that part after.

Endure to the end.

This too is good, but perfection does not come until the morning.

 

[Heart2Soul]

Suggestion: take yourself out of the picture and put someone else's needs before your own.
Phil 2 (NKJV)
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
¹ Therefore if there is any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and mercy,
² fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.
³ Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.
⁴ Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.
⁵ Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus,
⁶ who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God,

…
¹² Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling;
¹³ for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.
¹⁴ Do all things without complaining and disputing,
¹⁵ that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world,
¹⁶ holding fast the word of life, so that I may rejoice in the day of Christ that I have not run in vain or labored in vain.

“Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends.”
— John 15:13 (NKJV)

You see the answer to your complaints against God is to cease being a self-seeker and begin to put others before yourself.. become a humble servant ministering to the needs of others.

 

[Cassandra]

@Moonstone Eterni Please seek some help. It will make you feel better, and calm your mind down. Please call ♥♥

@Heart2Soul and @ScottA

This person is suffering psychologically and should be lovingly referred to a therapist.

 

[Moonstone Eterni]

Everyone else gets to have a life. They work their jobs, have a nice place to live, create families, etc. Success and a happy life is available for everyone who wants it—but it isn’t for me.

I want to work hard, own a house, marry a woman, and have a good family. But that dream has been taken from me! I have been deprived of my right to have a normal life—and it is all God’s fault! He refuses to get rid of the demons permanently unless I’m perfect. Since I cannot possibly achieve perfection, no matter how hard I try, it is never good enough for him.

I am stuck with demons forever, and they ruin my life. They cause untold suffering and misery, and God doesn’t care to do anything about it because I can’t be perfect. Why the hell does God think it’s okay to treat a Christian like this?

Last night I prayed to God and asked him to tell me why he is treating me so unfairly. Given that I’ll never be able to work, succeed, have a family, and will basically end up homeless and dead in the future (because I can’t live up to his radical standards), I am owed an explanation from him. My life is ruined because of God, and all I want to know is why he thinks he can do this to me.

As usual, my prayers were worthless. No response came. I couldn’t go to church because it’s too depressing to hear “God loves you” from a preacher when, in fact, my life is ruined because God won’t do anything about the demons unless I’m perfect (which is impossible), so my dream of ever succeeding is shattered because of God. But I did watch church TV. Unfortunately I didn’t hear anything relevant about my prayers from the TV preacher. Maybe God doesn’t care that he has ruined my life by imposing an impossible standard on me, which leaves me suffering with monstrous demons forever because I can’t be perfect.

I have given up on asking God to show some compassion and get rid of the demons permanently. He will never do it. He will always treat me so horribly because of my imperfection, so why even try anymore? God doesn’t care about my feelings. He doesn’t care that he has ruined my life.

Why do the same thing over and over and expect different results such as ask God to show compassion and get rid of the demons permanently despite my imperfections? He won’t do it, and apparently my feelings are worthless to him. But I will do this: I will ask God to explain himself. I want him to tell me why he is treating me so unfairly. He has ruined my life with his unfairness and lack of compassion, and I want an answer!

A core theological tenet of Christianity is that Jesus redeems the sins of believers. Christ is my savior, so it follows that I no longer have to be perfect and get judged for harmless little “sins”. For God to tell me I have to suffer with demons for imperfections, no matter how slight and insignificant, goes against what the Bible teaches. I want God to tell me why the hell he is treating me so unfairly! What he is doing to me is WRONG!

I don’t want God to tell me go and read the Book of Job. That is such a horrible cop out! The Book of Job has a happy ending where his life is restored, but that will never happen to me. Instead I will end up homeless and dead, and it’s all God’s fault for being such a jerk. He owes me an explanation. I want him to tell me why he is treating me so unfairly!

 

[Heart2Soul]

@Moonstone Eterni Please seek some help. It will make you feel better, and calm your mind down. Please call ♥♥

@Heart2Soul and @ScottA

This person is suffering psychologically and should be lovingly referred to a therapist.

I am not a professional counselor to know when a member is suffering from a psychological disorder. To refer someone to see a therapist is close to diagnosing them. Gotta leave that to professionals.
Now the forum is a great place to seek prayer, wisdom and guidance from those skilled in the Word.
I have asked God for His Will and supernatural touch on Moonstone Eterni...
Most notably is the user name is referencing a pagan belief contrary to the Christian faith...idolizing the moon.
Eterni is a type of character in an anime game.

 

[farouk]

Now the forum is a great place to seek prayer, wisdom and guidance from those skilled in the Word.

@Heart2Soul Prayer and the Scriptures can be such an encouragement to the believer.....

 

[Behold]

God wants me to be perfect, .

You believe that God wants you to be perfect,.....but God is wanting something much more valuable for you.
He wants to Love you, and help you...at all times.........and He wants you to love Him Back.

Christianity is not about "being perfect"...Its only about How much God loves us., and we learn to lean on this love, and this is our power and our eternal hope.

 

[Moonstone Eterni]

Nothing changed last night. I continue to suffer with demons, and God still won’t remove them because he dislikes my imperfection. Because of the extremely unfair way God is treating me, my life is basically ruined. My right to work hard, succeed, have a family, and have a normal life has been taken away—and God is the one who did it.

Since God has practically ruined my life, he owes me an explanation. It’s because of him that I will end up homeless and dead in the future. Yet despite asking repeatedly, he refuses to tell me why he is being such a horrible jerk by refusing to do anything about the demons because he dislikes my imperfection. God’s conduct isn’t right; it isn’t consistent with Bible teaching; and frankly, it’s immoral. He knows his lack of compassion and radical perfectionism will lead to my destruction, so why not tell me why he is being such a heartless jerk? As usual, no response.

Now I want to hurt God. He won’t give me an answer to a very simple question that doesn’t require any effort for him to answer, and I deserve an answer. God should have to suffer for ignoring me and trivializing the harm he has caused. I will surely think of a way to hurt God in the hardest way I can, and believe me, he will pay for what he has done. He will pay for refusing to tell me why he has ruined my life. He will suffer just as he is making me suffer.

Hey God, here is a good idea: Try listening to my opinion for once. And here is my opinion: Permanently get rid of the demons first, then I will be able to follow your absolutely bizarre requirement of perfection. I cannot tolerate going through an entire day of suffering with demons while being perfect, the whole time not knowing if the demons will go away because of your habitual fault-finding. If the demons were gone, you would get what you want and I would be perfect, since the terror would be gone and I wouldn’t feel the need to drown out the misery with alcohol and whatever. But no, you won’t listen to me, will you? You think my opinion is worthless. You don’t care about my feelings. You are such a selfish jerk!

Hey God, do you need a reason to listen to my opinion? The suffering you have caused me should be reason enough to actually give me a chance for once, but I guess you don’t feel any guilt over what you have done to me, do you? You know if you didn’t force me to overwork years ago I wouldn’t have irreparable pain in my hands, wrists, arms, neck, and upper back. My carpel tunnel syndrome shouldn’t have happened, but it happened because you told me to work or else you wouldn’t do anything about the demons. I worked and worked and worked, typing away just to give the appearance of work, hoping it would be enough for you to show compassion for once and get rid of the demons. And then I was permanently injured, suffering with horrible pain because of what you told me to do. And you still didn’t remove the demons permanently! You owe me credit for this injury you caused, because if I weren’t injured I could kill time by playing a no-brainer FPS game and not sin, my time being occupied. Now I can’t do it, and it’s your fault! Why not show some remorse for once and give me the credit I’ve earned, meaning listen to my and get rid of the demons permanently first, and then I’ll live up to your horrible standards? But no: I bet you won’t do that, because you don’t care about my feelings. Is feeling remorse beneath you?

Hey God, you better not keep ignoring me—or you will suffer. If you ignore me again and refuse to speak to me or do anything soon, then I will make sure to hurt you in the worst way I can. I’m sick and tired of you treating me so poorly. I’m sick and tired of being ignored when I am crying out to you. You will listen to me, or else you will suffer!

 

[Dropship]

..if I do something completely harmless like have a glass of wine, then I am found “guilty” of committing an “atrocious” sin..

Lighten up mate, there's nothing evil about wine and booze, remember Jesus changed water into wine, and he supped wine at the last supper.
It's only drunken bums who overdo it and get it a bad name..

 

[Moonstone Eterni]

Earlier I apologized to God for writing my rant post from this morning. But my anger is understandable: I am deprived of my right to work hard, succeed, marry a woman, have a family, and live a normal life. Instead I am confined to my parents house at age 33, having received many monthly SSI checks for over a decade now. My parents aren’t going to live forever; and they will eventually pass away, leaving me homeless, destitute, and eventually dead on the street. A truly agonizing death.

Yet my destruction shouldn’t happen in the first place. All my hopes and dreams of living a great successful life as a Christian should be able to come to fruition. Unfortunately that can happen only when God decides to remove the demons who have been wrecking havoc on my life, terrorizing me, and making my life a literal living hell.

I went to Walgreens shortly after my previous post, and new medicine arrived: It was Ativan, an anti-anxiety drug that assists with quitting alcohol, since alcohol withdrawals make me incredibly anxious. Ativan also helps numb the head pain from nicotine withdrawal, at least enough to soldier through it without extremely distressing pain in my brain; and though it doesn’t alleviate the cravings, that is a moot point because I don’t really crave the drug in first place (I crave relief from head pain more than anything).

So I was all good to go. I prayed to God that I was sorry for my previous anger rant that I posted, making sure to apologize multiple times; and then I apologized yet again, truly feeling bad about it.

Was I forgiven? Would God give me a second chance to be perfect today despite having used nicotine earlier? No alcohol was consumed up until that point (and I still haven’t had a drink all day today and don’t want to), so I thought all would be well. Thus, I prayed to God and asked for a second chance at perfection. Surely this would be the day to earn my permanent freedom from demons, never having to suffer with them ever again.

But my hopes proved to be worthless. Just completely worthless.

Shortly after taking the Ativan, I felt a bit sleepy. It’s a benzo pill where one of the main side effects is mild tiredness. Ten or fifteen minutes passed, and I needed a slight rest, so I went to lay down in my bed. I didn’t sleep, though: I merely rested my eyes, not bothering anyone and minding my own business.

What happened next was truly dreadful.

The demons didn’t like that I was resting my eyes, so they started threating to kill unsaved people on parallel dimensions. I begged and pleaded with God to stop it from happening, telling God that I’m doing what he wants, that I’ve been given a second chance, so please help me and stop the murders from happening. But to no avail: The demons committed several murders.

The murders were true acts of evil that resulted in profound tragedy for the victims and their families. I earned the right to be free from demons, having been given a second chance to follow God’s perfection requirement. Everything was all lined up: I would take the detox pill, withdraw from the addictions, and God would be happy, right? But no: It didn’t happen that way. Instead the demons were victorious—even though I did what God wanted!

Murdering other people for no legitimate reason—or for any actual reason—is truly depraved. But I wonder: Since I had been calling out to God to make it stop, telling him that I have all the tools to be perfect as he wants and get through the withdrawals, and he didn’t prevent those murders from happening, would anyone else agree that sounds depraved as well, even a little bit? God also remained silent as the murders were happening, and he still hasn’t said anything many hours later. Would anyone else agree that seems depraved too?

Surely God isn’t depraved. Surely the Bible is right about God being characterized as the epitome of love, mercy, and kindness. I believe that, because that is what the Bible teaches. That is why Jesus came into this world: He so loved humanity that Christ died for all believers, offering mercy and kindness to all beliers so that we can be saved. Yet my horrible experiences with demons, as well as God’s stark indifference to it all that I cannot possibly explain rationally, isn’t lining up with my Christian views.

I’m very upset about all this. And yeah, the depression I am suffering from is a consequence from these terrible experiences; it is truly killing my soul. I feel dead inside. I just wish God would reach out to me for once and say something. Just please, I want him to say anything!

I feel like a Jewish person who lived in Europe during the 1940s. What a Holocaust survivor felt is exactly what I feel. Jews in concentration camps (among the ones who survived) were incarcerated there for only a handful of years. As for me? My suffering has lasted over ten years now, and no end seems to be in sight. Ten years from now, will God still hold the belief that he won’t remove the demons who attach onto my body in the event that I make a mistake, including harmless mistakes that don’t offend anyone except God? Will God hold this view 20 years from now? How about 30? Maybe God will never relent; and if that is the case, a life of untold misery awaits me—and then death as a homeless man. My life will have turned out to be an abysmal failure, destruction having awaited me the whole time—and none of it would have happen if God decided to listen to me for once and show a compassionate heart.

Earlier today I tried to reason with God. I gave several very compelling reasons why he should remove the demons permanently and grant me my permanent freedom. I’m not so sure my prayers will work, though. My prayers for God’s compassion never seem to work. I feel so hopeless. And do you know what makes me feel even more hopeless? It's what comes after God doesn’t answer my prayers for compassion: I ask him why won’t you listen to me? Why not give me a chance at life? Why not show mercy, compassion, love, the Bible having described you as all those traits? And he doesn’t tell me why. No answer. Nothing. Just silence. Cold, deafening silence. That is the truly bone-chilling part that is wrecking my soul: To have the all-loving Creator refuse to get rid of the demons because he dislikes my imperfection; and when I ask why, he says nothing. That hurts more than anything else.

 

[Dropship]

..My parents aren’t going to live forever; and they will eventually pass away, leaving me homeless, destitute, and eventually dead on the street..

Lighten up mate and stop worrying..
When I was released from jail in 2002 (a 3-month vigilante rap) I was homeless, jobless, and living rough in a tent in a remote wood but my sense of humour was intact. "Oh great" I thought, "I've ended up as Bigfoot".
But I soon got out and up, no problemo..

 

[Moonstone Eterni]

Lighten up mate and stop worrying..
When I was released from jail in 2002 (a 3-month vigilante rap) I was homeless, jobless, and living rough in a tent in a remote wood but my sense of humour was intact. "Oh great" I thought, "I've ended up as Bigfoot".
But I soon got out and up, no problemo..

I can't lighten up.

Jesus is my savior; he died so that I can achieve salvation by having faith in him. I believe this theological tenet with absolute certainty. It isn’t possible for me to disavow Christ, because doing so would entail perdition and eternal suffering in hell.

Unfortunately I learned that Jesus doesn’t redeem sinners. Christ’s redemptive powers, which are transferred onto believers when they have faith, are supposed to forgive their sins; which of course implies that we no longer have to be perfect, because our “faith has made us whole,” as taught in various Bible verses like Luke 17:19. This core theological tenet of Christianity (that Jesus redeems the sins of believers) is misinformation, as I have sadly come to find out.

Yesterday I did a great thing: I quit drinking alcohol, not having even one little tiny sip. But God didn’t even care that I tried so to forgo a sin that is really hard to forgo in my abject circumstances: I still had to suffer with demons—because God found fault in me for being imperfect in some other area.

All I did was use nicotine. I’m addicted to both alcohol and nicotine. It is reasonable to quit one addiction first, then work on quitting the second addiction afterwards. Quitting two very addictive substances is very hard to do and probably has a much lower success rate than quitting one addiction at a time. But God doesn’t care about reason or fairness. He doesn’t care about my feelings.

Based on God’s history of being a complete unmerciful jerk and pathological fault-finder, I knew he didn’t want to help me get rid of the demons last night, so I tried to reason with him. In fact, the reasoning I used was very good (though none of it convinced God to show some compassion for once). Here is what I said:

Through a series of events (which I don’t want to elaborate on at this time), I found out that communist dictator Joseph Stalin is in heaven now. It seems odd that someone who presided over a Marxist empire with masses of penal camps could be in heaven, so I did some research on the internet. What did I find out?

Stalin had once been a very pious Christian who studied to be an Orthodox priest. He loved God with all his heart, and initially he was going to spend his life as one of his vicars (representatives). Unfortunately he was kicked out of the seminary for having a copy of Karl Marx’s manifesto. His teachers assumed the worst of him, so they disfellowshipped him.

The US is anti-Russia, so it follows that a lot of misinformation is out there about Stalin. One such piece of misinformation is that Stalin became an atheist after reading Charles Dawin’s Theory of Evolution book. However, the sources for this “fact” are doubtful (I researched it myself). There isn’t any evidence that Stalin ever turned his back on God. The fake quote was probably invented by a young earth creation activist to make well-established scientific theories look bad through association, because the YEC thinks science hurts his religion (it actually doesn’t).

I did more research and found out that Stalin regularly went to church throughout his life, even at the height of his power. He had frequent visits with his priest and went to confession often. What he said during confession is confidential, because priests aren’t allowed to share that with others. But yeah, based on everything I read, it sounds like Stalin was a good Christian who loved God. That is why he is in heaven now.

I’ll have to do more research on the Soviet penal camps. To be honest, I don’t think Stalin was organizing them and sending millions of victims to do horrible labor. It was probably lower ranked NKD officers (or whoever) who did all that, so maybe Stalin isn’t responsible for the gulag deaths. (Again, I need to research this some more, but I think I’m right here.)

But still, a lot of bad happened during those days, and Stalin presided over the nation at the time. So I said to God: “If Stalin can preside over a communist empire where widespread human rights abuses happened and get forgiven, why can’t I be forgiven for using nicotine? Then I made sure to tell God I tried really hard to quit alcohol that day, so it seems humane to let me quit one addiction first, and another addiction later.

As usual, God didn’t listen to me. I made a good argument, indeed a very logical and fair argument. But apparently it was worthless, indeed my feelings are worthless to God. He doesn’t care about how much distress and emotional harm he is causing me!

And you know what else? God didn’t even bother to feign an insincere apology for being such a jerk. Is God’s tact really so awful that he can’t pretend to be sorry, knowing that I know he is lying about being sorry? I guess even acknowledge the suffering he causes me by being a jerk is beneath him, isn’t it?

And you know what else I didn’t hear from God? He didn’t bother to send any encouraging messages. God can control my dreams, and in the past he made lucid dreams of events in the future (like certain victories over hell). God didn’t make a dream congratulating me on quitting alcohol or encouraging me to stay quit from drinking. He make a dream showing a Christian—or a person who represents a Christian—slaying a demon—or a thing that represents a demon—and then imply this will happen soon.

So yeah, I’m left feeling miserable and abandoned. Why God? Why?

 

[dev553344]

Everyone else gets to have a life. They work their jobs, have a nice place to live, create families, etc. Success and a happy life is available for everyone who wants it—but it isn’t for me.

I want to work hard, own a house, marry a woman, and have a good family. But that dream has been taken from me! I have been deprived of my right to have a normal life—and it is all God’s fault! He refuses to get rid of the demons permanently unless I’m perfect. Since I cannot possibly achieve perfection, no matter how hard I try, it is never good enough for him.

I am stuck with demons forever, and they ruin my life. They cause untold suffering and misery, and God doesn’t care to do anything about it because I can’t be perfect. Why the hell does God think it’s okay to treat a Christian like this?

Last night I prayed to God and asked him to tell me why he is treating me so unfairly. Given that I’ll never be able to work, succeed, have a family, and will basically end up homeless and dead in the future (because I can’t live up to his radical standards), I am owed an explanation from him. My life is ruined because of God, and all I want to know is why he thinks he can do this to me.

As usual, my prayers were worthless. No response came. I couldn’t go to church because it’s too depressing to hear “God loves you” from a preacher when, in fact, my life is ruined because God won’t do anything about the demons unless I’m perfect (which is impossible), so my dream of ever succeeding is shattered because of God. But I did watch church TV. Unfortunately I didn’t hear anything relevant about my prayers from the TV preacher. Maybe God doesn’t care that he has ruined my life by imposing an impossible standard on me, which leaves me suffering with monstrous demons forever because I can’t be perfect.

I have given up on asking God to show some compassion and get rid of the demons permanently. He will never do it. He will always treat me so horribly because of my imperfection, so why even try anymore? God doesn’t care about my feelings. He doesn’t care that he has ruined my life.

Why do the same thing over and over and expect different results such as ask God to show compassion and get rid of the demons permanently despite my imperfections? He won’t do it, and apparently my feelings are worthless to him. But I will do this: I will ask God to explain himself. I want him to tell me why he is treating me so unfairly. He has ruined my life with his unfairness and lack of compassion, and I want an answer!

A core theological tenet of Christianity is that Jesus redeems the sins of believers. Christ is my savior, so it follows that I no longer have to be perfect and get judged for harmless little “sins”. For God to tell me I have to suffer with demons for imperfections, no matter how slight and insignificant, goes against what the Bible teaches. I want God to tell me why the hell he is treating me so unfairly! What he is doing to me is WRONG!

I don’t want God to tell me go and read the Book of Job. That is such a horrible cop out! The Book of Job has a happy ending where his life is restored, but that will never happen to me. Instead I will end up homeless and dead, and it’s all God’s fault for being such a jerk. He owes me an explanation. I want him to tell me why he is treating me so unfairly!

We all have problems we face. I have similar problems, but I don't blame God. I have accepted that I am mentally disabled and work with doctors. Praying for you.

 

[Dropship]

..Yesterday I did a great thing: I quit drinking alcohol, not having even one little tiny sip...I still had to suffer with demons—because God found fault in me for being imperfect in some other area.

All I did was use nicotine. I’m addicted to both alcohol and nicotine.
..Through a series of events (which I don’t want to elaborate on at this time), I found out that communist dictator Joseph Stalin is in heaven now.
..There isn’t any evidence that Stalin ever turned his back on God.
..I did more research and found out that Stalin regularly went to church throughout his life, even at the height of his power. He had frequent visits with his priest and went to confession often.
..I’ll have to do more research on the Soviet penal camps. To be honest, I don’t think Stalin was organizing them and sending millions of victims to do horrible labor. It was probably lower ranked NKD officers (or whoever) who did all that, so maybe Stalin isn’t responsible for the gulag deaths. (Again, I need to research this some more, but I think I’m right here.)

1- Nothing wrong with booze or nicotine, just don't overdo it..
"Fruit trees of all kinds will grow on both banks of the river.Their leaves will not wither, nor will their fruit fail. Their fruit will serve for food and their leaves for healing" (Ezekiel 47:12)

2- If Stalin is in heaven I swear to God I don't wanna go!
Any dictator can go to church to confess his sins to hopefully get forgiven by God, but not a chance because "confessional" is just some nonsense cooked up by the catholic church..

3- Stalin was a real rotter, read the true book '3000 Days in Siberia' by Sim Kessel, he was an innocent guy rounded up like thousands of others to go work as slaves in the mines.

PS- you keep mentioning demons that are attacking you. How exactly are they attacking you?

 

[Moonstone Eterni]

The word “hate” has been diminished by leftists who overuse the term to describe conservatives who express common sense opinions. When a conservative says something progressives don’t like, they say he is guilty of “hate speech.” Many of them can’t tolerate hearing opinions other than their own, so they want to hurt and censor a conservative who says something like, “men belong in men’s bathrooms.”

Let’s pretend that leftists didn’t exist and the term “hate” never lost any meaning. It is indeed a very strong word (before progressives began labeling conservative views as hate), and it describes a very strong emotion.

I can’t help but admit that I’m feeling actual hatred towards God. I’m a Christian who has accepted Jesus as savior, yet I feel so much hatred for God because he refuses to give me a chance at living a normal life; he refuses to get rid of the demons; he refuses to even speak to me. I’m sick and tired of having to wake up every morning with demons attached, God having rejected my prayer from the previous night where I asked for his help—all because he dislikes my imperfection.

Do you know what I feel like in the morning? I feel so awful that God told me no. I feel horrified that I have to go through an entire day walking on eggshells to pass God’s bizarre perfection test with no guarantee that he will remove the demons (so many times in the past I was perfect, but he told me no because he found imperfection in some other area). It hurts. What God has done to me hurts. And now I hate him and want to hurt him.

My hatred towards God is growing increasingly larger, day after day. God does not have a right to treat a Christian this way! If anyone cares, then please pray to God and ask him to talk to me for once. I’m tired of not hearing from him. He needs to speak to me, or else I will keep hating him more and more. (Hint: Making cool Atari-like dreams doesn’t count as communication. I want him to actually speak to me, or else something bad will happen.)

 

[Moonstone Eterni]

PS- you keep mentioning demons that are attacking you. How exactly are they attacking you?

The demons attack me in many ways.

I’ll be laying on my bed, minding my own business and offending no one. Suddenly a demon will use a shocking device on my arm or head to shock me hard, and it hurts. I did nothing to them; they just decided to attack me for no obvious reason, and God didn’t stop it from happening.

The demons also inject me with poison throughout the night. I’m not sure what the poison does, but I think it exacerbates cancer development. They are killing me slowly as I sleep, and I can’t defend myself.

There is another demon who rapes and molests me in my sleep, and I can’t defend myself from him either.

The worst is their multiverse devices. They have devices where they can travel to parallel worlds where they kill my parallel self who is an atheist. They do this every single day and taunt me about it, having caused profound tragedy. It has happened over 2,000 times now.

And do you know what is the saddest part of all? Not a word from God. He won’t talk to me. Please pray and ask God to talk to me for once and listen to the distress he is causing me. And yes, it is God causing the distress: He says he won’t get rid of the demons unless I’m perfect, and I can’t be perfect.

 

[Moonstone Eterni]

1- Nothing wrong with booze or nicotine, just don't overdo it..
"Fruit trees of all kinds will grow on both banks of the river.Their leaves will not wither, nor will their fruit fail. Their fruit will serve for food and their leaves for healing" (Ezekiel 47:12)

2- If Stalin is in heaven I swear to God I don't wanna go!
Any dictator can go to church to confess his sins to hopefully get forgiven by God, but not a chance because "confessional" is just some nonsense cooked up by the catholic church..

3- Stalin was a real rotter, read the true book '3000 Days in Siberia' by Sim Kessel, he was an innocent guy rounded up like thousands of others to go work as slaves in the mines.

PS- you keep mentioning demons that are attacking you. How exactly are they attacking you?

By the way, do you know why else I’m mad at God? It’s the fact that I’m 33 years old, and I haven’t had sexual intercourse with a woman before—and it’s all God’s fault.

I couldn’t date during my high school days because I was heavily bullied, and there were two bullies who really inflicted a lot of psychological damage (one of them is in hell now, but the second one who did even more harm isn’t).

Fortunately I didn’t have to deal with human bullies for my entire adult life. (Well, there was one occasion where I stayed at a half-way house for three months, and a pretty rough crowd was there: Crack-smokers, former convicts, meth heads, etc. Some of them picked on me, but I’m old and wise enough to deal with unprovoked aggression appropriately: I just smiled, laughed, and pretended to be their best friend when they were hostile. I continued to be nice to them and show them kindness despite their aggressive teasing. Eventually they felt bad about it and apologized, and I said don’t worry about it. We got along fine after that.)

But my entire adult life has been plagued by actual demons who are attached to my body. I’m wise enough to know how to successfully deal with human bullies as an adult (as described in my previous paragraph). But these demons are on an entirely different wavelength. They aren’t even human: They are murderers whose only purpose is to destroy me because I am a Christian. The psychological harm they have caused me has been a thousand times more severe than what I experienced in high school.

Because I am so mentally and emotionally crippled by what the demons do to me, I can’t work a job and succeed. What kind of woman would want to marry a 33-year-old man who collects welfare payments and lives with his parents? None that I know—except perhaps for a gross prostitute, who only wants money and will give me a disease for life. No way will I do that!

Even if God decides to show compassion and get rid of the demons permanently (which seems like a pipe dream), how the hell am I supposed to find a wife afterwards? I resent that I’m a virgin and most women are not. Under no circumstances will I date/marry a woman who has been sexually intimate with another man before. I cannot tolerate that I’ve had to spend my entire adult life in an infernal prison while everyone else was dating and so happy. I resent that she had sex but I didn’t. So I’m basically s*** out of luck here unless God decides to find me a wife who hasn’t ruined herself by having sexual relations with someone else or other people.

 

[dev553344]

The demons attack me in many ways.

I’ll be laying on my bed, minding my own business and offending no one. Suddenly a demon will use a shocking device on my arm or head to shock me hard, and it hurts. I did nothing to them; they just decided to attack me for no obvious reason, and God didn’t stop it from happening.

The demons also inject me with poison throughout the night. I’m not sure what the poison does, but I think it exacerbates cancer development. They are killing me slowly as I sleep, and I can’t defend myself.

There is another demon who rapes and molests me in my sleep, and I can’t defend myself from him either.

The worst is their multiverse devices. They have devices where they can travel to parallel worlds where they kill my parallel self who is an atheist. They do this every single day and taunt me about it, having caused profound tragedy. It has happened over 2,000 times now.

And do you know what is the saddest part of all? Not a word from God. He won’t talk to me. Please pray and ask God to talk to me for once and listen to the distress he is causing me. And yes, it is God causing the distress: He says he won’t get rid of the demons unless I’m perfect, and I can’t be perfect.

My doctor told me that neural shocks can be coming from low chemical levels in the brain. You might want to see a doctor and give up this demonic idea.

 

[amadeus]

"And they stoned Stephen, calling upon God, and saying, Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.
And he kneeled down, and cried with a loud voice, Lord, lay not this sin to their charge. And when he had said this, he fell asleep." Acts 7:59-60