How to respond to 13-year-old daughter who declares being gay

[Pearl]

Demonstrating love for her is easy and not an issue. I'm just wondering if it's damaging to discuss it beyond that.

Daughter: I'm gay.
Parent: That's okay. I love you no matter what.
End of story because you don't want to damage the kid.

Or should there be more discussion?

Daughter: I'm gay.
Parent: I love you no matter what, kiddo. Can you tell me what makes you say that?
Dialogue follows...

Definitely more on the lines of the second choice. And pray before, during and after the talk that may follow. Do you pray together?

 

[RLT63]

This is not addressing anything I posted.

Again, refute what I posted and stop stamping your feet.

Just waiting to see what you can do with this verse.

 

[TinMan]

Just waiting to see what you can do with this verse.

So you can't refute what was posted. Can we expect more foot stomping?

 

[RLT63]

From your link: "It’s a new word; we don’t know of any other instances of the word until Paul coins the word in 1 Corinthians 6 and 1 Timothy 1."
Philo said the word means "temple prostitute" in Philo, The Special Laws, III, VII, 40-42 Which predates Paul by about 30 years years.


"It’s a compound word: “arsen” means man and “koite” or “koitas” or “koitai”—depending on a verb or a noun—means bed. It’s men who bed with other men."
arsen = man, koitas = bed. Paul is condemning the lazy


" Look at the Septuagint, which is the Greek translation of the Hebrew Bible, and then just look at the Greek for the necessary passage in Leviticus 18 and Leviticus 20 and you'll see there (and in fact the words are right next to each other in Leviticus 20) this word for man (“arsen”) and the word for bed (“koitai” or “koite”)."
The two words appear right next to each other 17 times in the Septuagint. What did they mean all these other times?

Men who bed with other men doesn’t mean they are lazy

 

[Space_Karen]

Many parents believe they don't have to care about their kids or raise their kids properly, social security will "take care of them" when they are old.

Or they believe there is no need to teach or educate their children, tax funded schools will provide those services for "free".

That is where gay 13 year olds come from.

 

[Jay Ross]

For a parent, you can first ask God to include your daughter or son to be included among those whom He is drawing to Himself.

Then the next thing you can do is to continually thank God that He has hear your request/prayer and rejoice that He is working on your request to draw your child to Himself and continue with your worshipping of God.

As God quietly works on drawing your child to Himself, you will begin to see changes in your child that will gladden your heart such that your praise worship will increase as you see God's Glory in what He is doing to draw your child to Himself.

 

[ButterflyJones]

I know the default answer is to "accept" the daughter's position on being gay as loving parents, but is it okay to discuss it and maybe show the daughter that she's actually not gay after all? Or will that be perceived as, "My parents don't love and accept me for being gay."? She might have friends who push that stance about the parents, which could cause harmful division between parents and daughter. Maybe she just saw some things on social media about it and declared it without truly understanding it or thinking it through. How should parents respond to a young teen if this comes up, especially knowing that other kids are egging her on and celebrating her newly-declared stance?

How does one show their child the child is not gay after all?

 

[TinMan]

Men who bed with other men doesn’t mean they are lazy

where do you get more than one man? there is no plural, just one. A man in a bed...lazy

 

[TinMan]

where do you get more than one man? there is no plural, just one. A man in a bed...lazy

and still no refutation

 

[RLT63]

where do you get more than one man? there is no plural, just one. A man in a bed...lazy

"It’s a compound word: “arsen” means man and “koite” or “koitas” or “koitai”—depending on a verb or a noun—means bed. It’s men who bed with other men." To quote you

 

[RLT63]

and still no refutation

If Paul wanted to indicate that someone was lazy he would have just used the word lazy, not come up with a new word

 

[Ronald David Bruno]

I know the default answer is to "accept" the daughter's position on being gay as loving parents, but is it okay to discuss it and maybe show the daughter that she's actually not gay after all? Or will that be perceived as, "My parents don't love and accept me for being gay."? She might have friends who push that stance about the parents, which could cause harmful division between parents and daughter. Maybe she just saw some things on social media about it and declared it without truly understanding it or thinking it through. How should parents respond to a young teen if this comes up, especially knowing that other kids are egging her on and celebrating her newly-declared stance?

Pray to dissolve these desires of your daughter, pray for her wisdom.
Kids are just foolish and do foolish things. A 13 year-old does not understand what life is about, you must explain it to her. God tells us in His word.
Simplify it.
We were created male and female for a purpose - Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. God intended for all of us to have a mate of the opposite sex. Only few were made to be eunuchs.
We are all sinners. God's Ten Commandments gives us a basic idea of what sin is, when we violate them.
"Honor your parents" is one of them. Obey them, they guide you, help you not to stumbled and fall into habitual sin that leads to darkness. Read through Romans 1 line by line.
We all have inclinations, desires, impulsive and powerful as they may be, we must learn to control them.
Food, drink, anger, words, lusts, our actions, etc., are things we need to learn how to control. Just because we like a person, enjoy being with them, talking to them, more than anyone, doesn't mean we should have sex with them. There are boundaries, rules in life. We are not to have sex with our parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins ... nor those of the same sex.
People have fits of anger towards someone which might lead to thoughts of killing them. But they must control their actions, stop and dismiss those thoughts because they are dangerous. So we need to dismiss lusts of sexual desires in the same way. Control ourselves. If not we descend into a dark place where the longer you remain, the more difficult it is to get out of.
There are consequences to sin. Some are temporary but some can ruin your life. God chastises those He loves, as we should chastise our children if they disobey and rebel, in a loving way. Tough love they call it.
Control your thoughts emotions and actions!

 

[amigo de christo]

and racists claim that black people acting as the social and moral equal of whites is sin.




just like anyone who says anything evil about anyone they should be rebuked

Warning the church about sin and not do so is not being evil . Being evil , is being evil .
Following the pattern that Christ and the apostels taught is good and right . changing or omitting the pattern
they set and taught is wrong . Ps , racism is wrong . so is murder . so is hate . so is lying
so is homosexuality and etc . And to warn the church not to partake in such things is good .
To correct error within the church is good .

 

[amigo de christo]

I have no interest in watching propaganda, can you summarize?

You dont have to listen to a word tucker says . rather just watch the interview and behold the evil getting glorfied .
Do take note that the so called priest , preacher or bishop is doing the works of darkness .

 

[Lambano]

"It’s a compound word: “arsen” means man and “koite” or “koitas” or “koitai”—depending on a verb or a noun—means bed. It’s men who bed with other men." To quote you

And to elaborate on that: koimaō is the verb that the Septuagint translators used for the Hebrew שָׁכַב ("sakab"), meaning "to lay with" in Leviticus 18 and 20 when talking about illicit sexual relations. Paul characteristically will use echoes from the Septuagint to point his Greek-speaking audience to certain passages.

And this is why I think "sleeping with" is a stupid euphemism. The one thing they ain't doin' is sleepin'.

 

[Lambano]

Since this thread is about a daughter, I should point out that all these verses (OT and NT) are about men. Other than an oblique reference in Romans 1:26, the Bible pretty much gives lesbians a free pass.

 

[RLT63]

And to elaborate on that: koimaō is the verb that the Septuagint translators used for the Hebrew שָׁכַב ("sakab"), meaning "to lay with" in Leviticus 18 and 20 when talking about illicit sexual relations. Paul characteristically will use echoes from the Septuagint to point his Greek-speaking audience to certain passages.

And this is why I think "sleeping with" is a stupid euphemism. The one thing they ain't doin' is sleepin'.

Genesis 19:1–13; Leviticus 18:22; 20:13; Romans 1:26–27; 1 Corinthians 6:9; 1 Timothy 1:10).

 

[TinMan]

"It’s a compound word: “arsen” means man and “koite” or “koitas” or “koitai”—depending on a verb or a noun—means bed. It’s men who bed with other men." To quote you

It's not a quote from me. But let me give you a quote, one i actually posseted: "Compound words don't derive their meaning form the meanings of their root words."

 

[TinMan]

If Paul wanted to indicate that someone was lazy he would have just used the word lazy, not come up with a new word

If Paul wanted to indicate that someone was gay he would have just used the word for gay and not use Philo's word for temple prostitute.

 

[TinMan]

Warning the church about sin and not do so is not being evil . Being evil , is being evil .
Following the pattern that Christ and the apostels taught is good and right . changing or omitting the pattern
they set and taught is wrong . Ps , racism is wrong . so is murder . so is hate . so is lying
so is homosexuality and etc . And to warn the church not to partake in such things is good .
To correct error within the church is good .

Its also a sin to say something evil (your words) about anyone, even LGBT people.