so who finally decides the what and why and when - shall we just let Jesus be the example and the answer = repent and/or believe and be baptized = yes but not spoken or directed directly at us but at adult non Christians, including the Apostles and early disciples - obviously but seemingly not so obvious infants are not required or expected to repent or believe until they are children - so Jesus gave us the answer and the example and the reason and sequence for baptism as at Mark 1 where like John a human baptizes with water but Jesus/God baptizes with the Holy Spirit and at baptism we receive our passport and heaven is opened for us and only those with eyes to see this or with ears to hear hear a voice say "this is my beloved in whom I am well pleased and then the Holy Spirit descends for those with eyes to see - twinc