We can all choose to be "victims" all our lives. Someone that other people always control. Or, we can decide to be who we want to be. It is OUR choice, NOT theirs. (Unless, of course our minds are so weak that we WANT to be "victims" controlled by someone else.)
Admittedly, it is a bit tough, because independence takes Personal RESPONSIBILITY. And some of us don't want to have to be responsible for our own thinking and feelings. We would rather just blame others for everything. (Ya know, the way children do.)